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How come my husband doesn't find me attractive? I wear hat from sun up to sun down but for the past days I fix my hair & not wearing a hat. He haven't said a world. The thing is I find him so sexy & attractive. He's in the late 50's in my eyes he's so fine. He never tells me I'm beautiful sext attractive. I look nice. Or even I like that color hair you got. I'm always checking him out. His interest is only me cooking & him having sex & telling me your all mine right? Then saying I'm all yours. I can't get enough of him he is so handsome & fine. I just don't get it. I don't want him saying nice stuff when I slim. I wanna hear it now.

I'm I whining or sound like a child??

Nope not childish. I know how you feel. And it ain't fun

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I would talk to him!

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The grass is greener on the other side because its fertilized with bullshit

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Before my surgery me and my husband separated because he still wants to be a kid and my weight could of been and issue as well but he always said to me that my weight never bothered him not that I'm 70lb lighter I slowly see him tryin to sneak back in my life! But I'm not about that!! If you didn't like me when I was fat don't come around now that I'm smaller because this chick is never settling ever again I deserve way more better!!

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I would talk to him!

I don't want him to know how I feel. If he doesn't know it by now he will never know after over 16 years.

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Before my surgery me and my husband separated because he still wants to be a kid and my weight could of been and issue as well but he always said to me that my weight never bothered him not that I'm 70lb lighter I slowly see him tryin to sneak back in my life! But I'm not about that!! If you didn't like me when I was fat don't come around now that I'm smaller because this chick is never settling ever again I deserve way more better!!

Well said!

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How come my husband doesn't find me attractive? I wear hat from sun up to sun down but for the past days I fix my hair & not wearing a hat. He haven't said a world. The thing is I find him so sexy & attractive. He's in the late 50's in my eyes he's so fine. He never tells me I'm beautiful sext attractive. I look nice. Or even I like that color hair you got. I'm always checking him out. His interest is only me cooking & him having sex & telling me your all mine right? Then saying I'm all yours. I can't get enough of him he is so handsome & fine. I just don't get it. I don't want him saying nice stuff when I slim. I wanna hear it now.

I'm I whining or sound like a child??

You are not whining Mami you are venting.."totally different :-) I know you don't want to talk to him but seriously my husband is always asking me to please tell him how I feel about things because he said he seriously cannot tell by my actions etc. he admits to being clueless although I really do think he tries but some husbands just need it said loud and clear so there is no gray area.

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You are not whining Mami you are venting.."totally different :-) I know you don't want to talk to him but seriously my husband is always asking me to please tell him how I feel about things because he said he seriously cannot tell by my actions etc. he admits to being clueless although I really do think he tries but some husbands just need it said loud and clear so there is no gray area.

He is old fashion & think there is only 4/5 ways of having sex. I want him to grab me coming threw the door of course when kids are in school. He is 55 I'm 33 this is the 2nd marriage 18 he lasted last one. If he doesn't know there's many sex position by now. Can't tell me I'm beautiful or nice things. I dont wanna be with him.

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He is old fashion & think there is only 4/5 ways of having sex. I want him to grab me coming threw the door of course when kids are in school. He is 55 I'm 33 this is the 2nd marriage 18 he lasted last one. If he doesn't know there's many sex position by now. Can't tell me I'm beautiful or nice things. I dont wanna be with him.

Can't say I blame you there Mami! My husband is 50 but he is not old fashioned and does give me compliments often. I agree it's hard to keep things spiced up if only one of you is trying.

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Miami- if your husband won't do things on his own to you - then it sounds like you need to take control of the situation! Plan a night, get a babysitter, and YOU SHOW your husband how and what you want & like! I can't imagine any man not wanting to participate!! Good luck :)

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Jealousie is stupid. If my wife wants to run off with another man, then I am ok with that. I want her to be happy, and I want to be wanted. If she wants someone more than me, then she should go. I say that with no malice at all. I have never doubted her in 20 years of marriage, and I won't spend time/energy worrying about it. Stop the pussyfooting, and find a nice gentle decent way to tell the spouses to grow up. As for flirting in marriage: There is a definite difference between flirting and coming on to someone. If you don't know the diff, then don't flirt. Simple.

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Jealousie is stupid. If my wife wants to run off with another man' date=' then I am ok with that. I want her to be happy, and I want to be wanted. If she wants someone more than me, then she should go. I say that with no malice at all. I have never doubted her in 20 years of marriage, and I won't spend time/energy worrying about it. Stop the pussyfooting, and find a nice gentle decent way to tell the spouses to grow up. As for flirting in marriage: There is a definite difference between flirting and coming on to someone. If you don't know the diff, then don't flirt. Simple.[/quote']

Love the statement!!!!

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 1 reply
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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