Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Do I have the right to ask MD.....



Recommended Posts

So I read a post about googling your doc and reading reviews. All the reviews on my surgeon going back to 2003 are great and fit in with everything I have heard about him. According to his office, he has done over 5000 procedures and has had only 1 leak, an no other major complications. But what also came up is that he got a DUII in April. My question is do I have the right to ask him about this and if so how on earth do I bring it up? On a side note his DUII was received at 152 am on a Friday, and he is off that day. It is less concerning than had it been mid week, though I am so against drunk driving that it still irritates me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So I read a post about googling your doc and reading reviews. All the reviews on my surgeon going back to 2003 are great and fit in with everything I have heard about him. According to his office, he has done over 5000 procedures and has had only 1 leak, an no other major complications. But what also came up is that he got a DUII in April. My question is do I have the right to ask him about this and if so how on earth do I bring it up? On a side note his DUII was received at 152 am on a Friday, and he is off that day. It is less concerning than had it been mid week, though I am so against drunk driving that it still irritates me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it's up to you. My guess is he won't be thrilled with you bringing it up. But if it's a genuine concern of yours, you could try something like "I know you weren't on the job, but I was a little nervous when I read about your DUI."

My surgeon also had a great record, but was sued a couple years ago for refusing to operate on an HIV-positive patient. I was deeply troubled by that, as the risk would be nearly nothing as long as they are using proper surgical technique. A good friend of mine is HIV positive and he once accidentally cut himself cooking, and in helping him tend to his wound, I forgot about everything and ended up getting HIV-infected blood all over my skin. That was years ago, and I didn't get infected. Point being I saw it as a knock on my surgeon's ethics.

I weighed it, but ultimately decided that nobody's perfect, and went ahead with it. There's stuff in my past I'm not thrilled about...we all make poor choices sometimes.

But only you can decide if that's a deal-breaker. I imagine that if a good friend was killed by a drunk driver, I'd chose a different surgeon....I would feel too strongly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it's up to you. My guess is he won't be thrilled with you bringing it up. But if it's a genuine concern of yours, you could try something like "I know you weren't on the job, but I was a little nervous when I read about your DUI."

My surgeon also had a great record, but was sued a couple years ago for refusing to operate on an HIV-positive patient. I was deeply troubled by that, as the risk would be nearly nothing as long as they are using proper surgical technique. A good friend of mine is HIV positive and he once accidentally cut himself cooking, and in helping him tend to his wound, I forgot about everything and ended up getting HIV-infected blood all over my skin. That was years ago, and I didn't get infected. Point being I saw it as a knock on my surgeon's ethics.

I weighed it, but ultimately decided that nobody's perfect, and went ahead with it. There's stuff in my past I'm not thrilled about...we all make poor choices sometimes.

But only you can decide if that's a deal-breaker. I imagine that if a good friend was killed by a drunk driver, I'd chose a different surgeon....I would feel too strongly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is tough. Only you can truly decide how you would like to proceed with this. It definitely would concern me, but he is human. He's not void of faults just because he's a Doctor. If he's getting great reviews by his patients then that should speak for itself. I mean if he cheats on his wife, is that any of your business? We all have personal lives outside of our professions and it seems his patients are happy with the end result. How many pilots have a few drinks before take off and we still get in that plane? Just my opinion. Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is tough. Only you can truly decide how you would like to proceed with this. It definitely would concern me, but he is human. He's not void of faults just because he's a Doctor. If he's getting great reviews by his patients then that should speak for itself. I mean if he cheats on his wife, is that any of your business? We all have personal lives outside of our professions and it seems his patients are happy with the end result. How many pilots have a few drinks before take off and we still get in that plane? Just my opinion. Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would only ask him about it if you think his answer will have an impact on your decision to use him as your surgeon. In order to do that, you should visualize asking him the question, and imagine different answers that he might give. Personally I can only imagine his saying something along the lines of "Yes it was a terrible mistake. We had gone to a party and I usually don't drink, but I had a couple of drinks and ...."

I can't visualize a situation where he says "Well I usually get drunk every Friday night, and that night I got unlucky and got stopped. And I usually have a drink or two before the surgery just to steady my hands."

Since I can't imagine an answer other than the first one, I personally wouldn't ask him about it, but you should certainly ask if you want to.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would only ask him about it if you think his answer will have an impact on your decision to use him as your surgeon. In order to do that, you should visualize asking him the question, and imagine different answers that he might give. Personally I can only imagine his saying something along the lines of "Yes it was a terrible mistake. We had gone to a party and I usually don't drink, but I had a couple of drinks and ...."

I can't visualize a situation where he says "Well I usually get drunk every Friday night, and that night I got unlucky and got stopped. And I usually have a drink or two before the surgery just to steady my hands."

Since I can't imagine an answer other than the first one, I personally wouldn't ask him about it, but you should certainly ask if you want to.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would only ask him about it if you think his answer will have an impact on your decision to use him as your surgeon. In order to do that, you should visualize asking him the question, and imagine different answers that he might give. Personally I can only imagine his saying something along the lines of "Yes it was a terrible mistake. We had gone to a party and I usually don't drink, but I had a couple of drinks and ...."

I can't visualize a situation where he says "Well I usually get drunk every Friday night, and that night I got unlucky and got stopped. And I usually have a drink or two before the surgery just to steady my hands."

Since I can't imagine an answer other than the first one, I personally wouldn't ask him about it, but you should certainly ask if you want to.

Yep. It's gotta be your call...only you can decide how important the issue is.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would only ask him about it if you think his answer will have an impact on your decision to use him as your surgeon. In order to do that, you should visualize asking him the question, and imagine different answers that he might give. Personally I can only imagine his saying something along the lines of "Yes it was a terrible mistake. We had gone to a party and I usually don't drink, but I had a couple of drinks and ...."

I can't visualize a situation where he says "Well I usually get drunk every Friday night, and that night I got unlucky and got stopped. And I usually have a drink or two before the surgery just to steady my hands."

Since I can't imagine an answer other than the first one, I personally wouldn't ask him about it, but you should certainly ask if you want to.

Yep. It's gotta be your call...only you can decide how important the issue is.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Either you trust your surgeon or you don't . If you don't then I'd suggest you start looking for a new doctor.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Either you trust your surgeon or you don't . If you don't then I'd suggest you start looking for a new doctor.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What answer are you expecting to get from him that would make it OK for you to proceed? I suspect that nothing he would say would make you comfortable. If that is so, switch doctors now, unless you just want to punish him by putting him on the spot. I don't approve of drunk driving either, but personally I would never confront my doctor about it. That's just me, though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What answer are you expecting to get from him that would make it OK for you to proceed? I suspect that nothing he would say would make you comfortable. If that is so, switch doctors now, unless you just want to punish him by putting him on the spot. I don't approve of drunk driving either, but personally I would never confront my doctor about it. That's just me, though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×