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Do therapists work?



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I'm considering going to see the therapist that did my eval. I know I have underling issues that need to be worked out but do they really help you figure it all out? I am hoping to hear from people who have both had success and possibly didn't. I want the entire picture. I'm not asking anyone to give me details they don't want to share. Just if it worked!!

You and I have talked about this some already. I am completely certain I wouldn't be where I am at without a therapist. Trying to do WLS without one would be disastrous for me. But that's me. I do EMDR, which is used for PTSD and anxiety. If this is part of your problem then I highly recommend it. Finding the right therapist is key. The thing I think helps the most is that my therapist doesn't let me bullsh*t her. I can rationalize the hell out of something. I work in a social services type field, so I know all the lingo to make myself seem mentally fine. She holds my feet to the fire and keeps me honest. And the times when I have had real mental breaks she has been available to talk me off the ledge and get me in for an appointment preventing me from being hospitalized.

My experience with my psychologist who screened me for surgery was completely different. I was open and honest with him because I thought that was the right thing to do. But he wouldn't be someone I would see outside of the required screening. In talking to him he sees things very black and white. It's his way or it's wrong. Example, my screening showed I have depression and anxiety (things I already knew). He thought I should be on meds and I disagreed. He also said I shows signs of "adjustment disorder." My response to that was that I am sure if there is something I have some uncomfortableness then there is a "disorder" diagnosis to go with it.

Which makes me think of another reason things work well between me and my therapist. We agree on my treatment plan. I went in there knowing I didn't want to be put on meds right away. I wanted to go through treatment and would discuss meds if my issues were affecting my ability to work and function in life. She agreed. Thankful we did this cause I am now being monitored for a possible bi-polar II diagnosis that we wouldn't have discovered had I already been medicated. I believe life should have moments of extreme joy and it's set of struggles. My therapist agreed and supported me in my decisions. Things work between my therapist and I because we can be very candid with my mental health overall. It's this type of relationship that I have come to value in my therapist. Okay - I feel like I am writing a book. I hope this helps you make some decisions. If you want to know more about EMDR and how it works just send me a PM and I can go into greater detail. It's not the typical "talking things out."

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Yep!

With the right therapist it can and does help!

I've been through several therapists in the past.

I must admit some of them where a waste of time. I wasn't ready for change with one' date=' and another cried when I told my truths (trust me you don't want a therapist that empathizes so much she cries :P)

It takes work, in therapy of course, but also the leg work into finding the right one. I'd say don't just go and stay with the first one if it doesn't feel right. :)

[/quote']

Heh, I had one therapist get visibly angry when I told mine.

Therapy has been good for me but it took a while before I was really ready to be honest and do the work. Sometimes I wish that readiness had come about in my 20s vs in my 30s, but the important thing is it happened.

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Yep! With the right therapist it can and does help! I've been through several therapists in the past. I must admit some of them where a waste of time. I wasn't ready for change with one' date=' and another cried when I told my truths (trust me you don't want a therapist that empathizes so much she cries :P) It takes work, in therapy of course, but also the leg work into finding the right one. I'd say don't just go and stay with the first one if it doesn't feel right. :) [/quote']

I think it should be a general rule that the only one allowed to cry during therapy is the patient, not the therapist. Smh

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I'm seeing a therapist right now n half the time I think she learning it just as I am. We talk and exercises on coping skills that work n learning to accept bad feelings etc. I personal thinks its a waste of my time and all that I'm being taught to understand is common sense. They put all the responsibility on your should and do away way external factors as if that's the key to everything. While I think therapy can help but it depends a lot on the doctor, their experience and method. To each their own.

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I'm seeing a therapist right now n half the time I think she learning it just as I am. We talk and exercises on coping skills that work n learning to accept bad feelings etc. I personal thinks its a waste of my time and all that I'm being taught to understand is common sense. They put all the responsibility on your should and do away way external factors as if that's the key to everything. While I think therapy can help but it depends a lot on the doctor' date=' their experience and method. To each their own.[/quote']

That's exactly what my thinking is and hence my reason for the question. I feel that if I'm just talking about stuff then I can do that alone. I think I may give it a try, can't hurt to see what's its all about.

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I do therapy for a living and I think that the basis of therapy is getting a person too finally admit things to themselves sometimes it may seem like you're talking and talking and not getting anywhere but as you talk therapist will look for patterns and questions and you may not see what they're doing right away but sooner or later you'll begin to admit things to yourself that your defenses wouldn't let you before.. Most therapist won't answer questions for you that will work with you to get you to answer the questions for yourself. The same kind of thinking that got us to the wait we were at is the same kind of thinking that the therapist will try to get you to admit to yourself. For me I made a lot of excuses and told myself a lot of lies to get to the place where I was with my weight and it wasn't until I was ready that I saw what was really going on therapists in essence kind of open our eyes just depends on what are ready for most therapist will never tell you exactly what your problem is because if we're not ready to hear it they will never believe it . I would say give it a shot be honest with them and be honest with yourself and find somebody that you can really trust and you don't feel that you're being judged if you feel uncomfortable then it will never work good luck to you

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I do therapy for a living and I think that the basis of therapy is getting a person too finally admit things to themselves sometimes it may seem like you're talking and talking and not getting anywhere but as you talk therapist will look for patterns and questions and you may not see what they're doing right away but sooner or later you'll begin to admit things to yourself that your defenses wouldn't let you before.. Most therapist won't answer questions for you that will work with you to get you to answer the questions for yourself. The same kind of thinking that got us to the wait we were at is the same kind of thinking that the therapist will try to get you to admit to yourself. For me I made a lot of excuses and told myself a lot of lies to get to the place where I was with my weight and it wasn't until I was ready that I saw what was really going on therapists in essence kind of open our eyes just depends on what are ready for most therapist will never tell you exactly what your problem is because if we're not ready to hear it they will never believe it . I would say give it a shot be honest with them and be honest with yourself and find somebody that you can really trust and you don't feel that you're being judged if you feel uncomfortable then it will never work good luck to you

Thanks for that!!!

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I used a speaking text device on my phone and didn't realize that there's no grammar in my last post it's very hard to read ..I apologize

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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