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The best comback line ever (Adult)

Tired_Old_Man

By Tired_Old_Man, in The Lounge

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Tired_Old_Man    1

Tired_Old_Man
Posted

The best comback line ever

The police arrested Ward Branham, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Lethbridge, Alberta, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m., on Friday. Ward will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Calgary courthouse on Monday.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop."You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around there for miles. "At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview. Ward went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need." "I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.In the process, Ward apparently failed to notice a police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until Officer Brin Taylor (female) approached him.

It was an unusuall situation, that's for sure," said Officer Taylor. "I walked up to Ward and he's just working away at this pumpkin." Taylor went on to describe what happened when SHE approached Ward. "I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?"

Ward froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight in the face and said, 'A pumpkin? Damn, is it midnight already'?"

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Gaffer    1

Gaffer
Posted

I lived in Lethbridge for 8 years, and my wifes family lives there. I am pretty sure that this is false. I have never seen or heard of a pumpkin patch near there. The weather is not really great to grow pumpkins as Lethbridge is practically a desert. I know there are no pumpkin Patches in Calgary as it is too cold & close to the mountains

Being from Calgary, I am pretty sure that they would arraign him at the courthouse in Lethbridge.

Sorry to ruin the joke.

A

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lisah25    3

lisah25
Posted

All I can think about is the edges of the pumkin. Ouch!

That's very practical of you! I was thinking about how cold the inside of a pumpkin would be... :faint:

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Wheetsin    714

Wheetsin
Posted

I'm with Laurend. My first thought was - ouch - pumpkin edges are pretty damn tough. And then I thought, "He better hope he drilled the hole big enough."

Only thoughts insofar as the joke was a story, of course. :rose:

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    • Alisa_S

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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