I cannot believe what I'm doing...don't I get it?

[AdiosPlusSizes 19]

Hi Sleevers,

I am in need of some tough love.

I am probably one of the very few that has fallen off the wagon so early on. I am only 11 days post-op and I've already cheated. Today, I had such a giant craving for some bread that I drove down to Trader Joes and bought myself some rolls. My only saving grace, I think, is that I chose the rolls that seemed the healthiest because one roll had 10 grams of Protein and 5 grams of Fiber. Well, I took those puppies home and ate one with a small bowl of creamy Tomato and bell pepper Soup. I did not eat it all at once, as it would not fit, but I did manage to eat it. It did feel somewhat weird in my stomach for a bit but it do not come back up or cause me pain.

What is wrong with me? Why am I already messing up? I am supposed to be on full liquids for 3 more days and then transition to pureed foods, but I'm already eating bread.

I paid for the surgery myself, so I was able to get it very quickly and without any hassel. I did not have to see a nutritionist or lose weight to qualify or anything. Maybe this is why I am being so weak, so early on. I've already dropped a total of 15 pounds since starting my 7 day pre-op diet, and I'm feeling good about how I look. This might also be why I'm veering from my path, or maybe I'm subconsciously afraid to get thin, or something. I don't know what is wrong with me, but if I don't straighten myself out now, then I can be sure that more and more cheating will soon come.

Does anyone have any good words for me? I appreciate your help and support.

Adriana

[ktmac26 6]

You gotta remember why you chose to have the surgery, and why would you already start to sabotage yourself. What works for me is I have a pair of short on my bedroom door that are my goal size. Every morning I see them and every night I see them. That helps me!

[sue8925 17]

Dont beat yourself up. Its hard, hard hard to change. Try again tomorrow

[Deanne 22]

I was only a few days out when my son brought donuts home and I just couldn't resist, I cut off a tiny piece and ate it and it hurt so it stopped me from eating anymore. But I totally understand, I get cravings for food that I've not had in awhile and want to eat it. I usually end up just tasting it for the flavor cause I know it's going to hurt. I'm 2 months out now and only drinking Protein Drinks and munching on whole wheat crackers when I need something crunchy, Not sure if they are good for me but they make me feel better.

[Ms.AntiBand 2,984]

It's not just your weight loss you're messing with.. You may do a lot of damage or cause yourself some serious sleeve issues. Does this not scare you? I died twice with band complications and getting the sleeve was my final chance at not failing or sabotaging a WLS.. I refuse to play games with things now. My life and success is very important... Please value yourself too! Be careful

[ShrinkingBiker 121]

It seems like you realize that you did wrong, so just throw out the remaining rolls and move along. I would be more concerned with doing physical damage to yourself that far out over screwing up on a food item.

You are a day ahead of me, and while I do crave breads I fear what I might do if it where to get stuck. From that I can imagine the inside of your stomach looks like a zipper of sorts right now, that's a lot of little areas that something might lodge and cause issues.

Just tough it out and remember why you did this, and how good it makes you feel when you step onto the scale and see that number smaller each time.

Now, this is something that I am kinda speaking out of my ass with, but maybe you should look into a support group.. I know my Doc offers one, but I don't partake in it right now because I chose a doc that is over an hour from my house. Just some thoughts that may help.

[newoutlookonlife 46]

I think your doing the right thing by coming on here and seeking out support. Dont beat your self up too badly. it is hard to change life long habits. Right now what you need to remember is that you don't want to increase your chances for a leak in your incision so for safety reasons you really want too stick to the list op diet that your dr has you on. Make sure you are getting in all your fluids, I found that helped curb the any hunger as well as find things to preoccupy your mind. I started listening to audio books in my spare time and it helped curb the head hunger.

[NewAshes 232]

You could have at least blended it up! Lol

[AmandaRaeLeo 2,145]

Too much too soon. food addiction aside, the potential for damage to your healing stomach?!?! Not worth it.

I know I'm addicted to food and so I'm planning to join Overeaters Anonymous. Maybe there is one in your area? It couldn't hurt to check. *Disclaimer: I'm not implying you need therapy, just offering a potential solution.

Amanda Rae

[tb21872 31]

Don't beat yourself up too much for cheating. It is going to happen! Just do better tomorrow. If it makes you feel better, I have been licking chocolate and raw cookie dough off my fingers all day prepping for Easter tomorrow! Ugh! Lol.

My concern would be the safety of eating all that bread so soon after surgery. I am 3 months out and STILL have issues with bread. Be careful and good luck!

[BigFatLoser 331]

You did a great thing by coming here and being accountable. Hug.

This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I had some wheats kesnthe other day. And a cookie. Had to sleep off the nausea. I took a breath and gathered myself and I'm back on track. I'm only a little over 2 weeks out, so im right there with ya.

Don't do it again. It's dangerous and it's self destructive and you deserve so much better than that. You can do it.

[BigFatLoser 331]

Wheatables*

[fyre_storm 1,412]

Uh bread expands your tummys still healing. Kaboom. Ouch. Not worth it.

[Takingcontrol 467]

You craved something, you had it! Craving should be satisfied...throw the rest out & keep on trucking! It's called life..& it happens! Don't beat yourself up over it!

[AdiosPlusSizes 19]

Okay, I threw the rest of the bag away. Why did this not occur to me before? I not only threw them away but I soaked them in dirty Water, crumpled them up, and then threw them away.

No more messing around!! liquids only, for the next three days. No excuses!

I guess I thought this was going to be easier than it turned out to be. I've read many posts where people say that people are not even hungry post-op and their tastes have really changed. Well, I am still craving most all of the same junk, but it still remains to be seen if I still enjoy the same stuff. Right now, it's all these craving in my head, fueled by the idea that I'm not getting enough calories. I've heard people say that post-op they shoot for about 800 calories a day, but in my mind that is way too low. I think that I should be eating between 1,200 and 1,500 calories each day, to lose weight steadily but not too fast. It's all just excuses, I suppose.

Thanks everyone for your support. Please keep the suggestions coming. I need all I can get. I have to beat this!

Adriana