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I am being sleeved in April and not telling anyone but my boyfriend and a close friend. So, for those of you out there that have kept this a secret, how do you explain the weight loss and different eating habits? And , although I am not concerned about not being able to drink alchoholic beverages anymore, I'm not sure how I explain that I won't be at social events. I'm concerned that there will be questions about the changes and family concerns over them.

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Hi there....

i just want you to ask yourself this question : why did you do it ?

I guess we all did this because we wanted to have a better life. why are you so concerned with what people might say ? tell them all...at some point you will need thier support.

you might think that No one will ever understand it, but you can't be sure

Be happy for your new life and enjoy every momnent.

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I still go to social functions. I know people still occasionally drink, but i have decided not to. So i just go and have Water, juice, tea, etc. i am very open about my surgery, but if people ask, i just tell them i choose not to drink alcohol anymore

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I am being sleeved in April and not telling anyone but my boyfriend and a close friend. So' date=' for those of you out there that have kept this a secret, how do you explain the weight loss and different eating habits? And , although I am not concerned about not being able to drink alchoholic beverages anymore, I'm not sure how I explain that I won't be at social events. I'm concerned that there will be questions about the changes and family concerns over them.[/quote']

If you are hell bent on not telling people about your choice to have WLS then keep it simple. You have completely changed your lifestyle and <insert food/beverage here> are not apart of your lifestyle change. Then immediately thank them for their understanding which should hopefully minimize anyone insisting you "indulge".

Amanda Rae

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I agree, the decision to have weight loss surgery is a personal one, as is the decision of who to share it with. If you don't want to share, then just tell them you are cutting back and eating healthier in an effort to lose weight and improve your overall health. If they ask why you are not drinking you can say research shows that alcohol inhibits your ability to lose weight and therefore you choose not to partake of it right now.

Sent from my iPad using VST

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Thank everyone. I wish I was surrounded by people that would understand and be supportive on my decision but I am not so this is the way it has to be.

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Sherri, I'm right there with you. My husband is supportive and I've told my sister (only cuz I need her help to watch the cat). But she is really trying to talk me out of it. So I can only take dealing with one person's negative attitude.

As for work, I've already started my shakes and eating very light around co-workers. I lost a lot of weight four years ago (gained it all back of course) so they are used to seeing me watch my diet.

I say start now with new eating/drinking habits and telling folks you are going to try to take off some weight and eat better. Then when it starts really happening you will look like a real success.

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That's a good idea. Ill start changing my evil ways now. It won't seem as suspicious after the surgery. I vacation in July with my sister and friends where it's a big party with alot of eating and drinking. By then I should be down some in weight and would rather not have to deal with it but I have already purchased my tickets. Oh well...ill look good anyway! Thanks!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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