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help! less than 3 weeks away from surgery, STILL undecided!



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I made the decision to get sleeved in January, but the sooner the surgery is getting, the more I'm having doubts! I was so confident in my decision that now all I can think about is things I'll be missing. Like all my favorite foods & alcohol, and not being able to drink with my meal. Are these just simple pleasures I can give up? How did everyone else deal with it? I just want to know if its worth all of that, I'm confused if its my "fatness" coming out thinking of these things... I've been heavy my entire life so I really don't know any different. Is it worth it?

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You are asking us to tell you if it's worth it, I think all of us post-op will resoundingly say, yes, it was worth it for us. The questions you might actually be asking yourself is Are you ready? The things you are worrying about are really minor when compared to the more energy, the better health, the longer life you might live because of the surgery, in my opinion. Also, I don't want to sound like a negative nelly, but it sounds like your worries may be hiding some deeper issues for you. Have you talked to your Psychiatrist about these fears?

For many of us, it's an 'easy' road, but there are those out there also who have suffered complications, and their journey is different, and more difficult. The truth is, eventually you will be able to eat your favorite foods again, you will be able to drink alcohol, and if you want, you can drink while you eat. The other half of that coin is our favorite foods probably contributed to how we got to where we needed surgery in the first place, alcohol is a lot of empty calories, and sadly some people find it too easy to trade their food addiction for alcoholism, and drinking while you eat fills you up faster, makes your food digest faster, so you are hungrier sooner, and can make you really uncomfortable, and possible cause you to vomit.

Having the sleeve is not like a magic pill. It doesn't make you skinny automatically, it is a great tool for encouraging you to make better choices, but if you're afraid of those better choices before you get the tool, you might not know how to use it once you get it, and that could make you more miserable. I don't think anyone can answer for you if it's worth it, because only you know yourself, but do be sure that you know yourself enough to know you are ready and can face the challenges, because this is a change for the rest of your life, it's not reversable, and yes, you will have to make sacrifices. I hope you can do some soul searching. Good luck on whatever you decide.

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Thank you so much. you definitely shed some light on alot of things. your right, it is minor things getting in the way of the big picture.

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I know when I made the decision to get the sleeve I was sick of being obsessed with food and was tired of all the time and guilt I put in thinking about food. I look forward to loosing my hunger and being able to feel full quickly. Time will tell but I'm optimistic for this change. You will be able to eat most of what you want eventually just in smaller portions. Thi tool will hopefully help us make better choices. Good questions to ask yourself good luck.

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Everyone is different. food used to be one of the only things I enjoyed in life. I ate because I was bored most days. Now I've found I enjoy things much better than eating my favorite foods. I never thought that would happen because I was a major food addict.

And you can still have your favorite foods from time to time. You just won't be able to overeat on them. Other of your favorite foods you probably will lose a desire to eat it all together. Like before surgery I was always eating snack cakes/little debbies and french fries. After surgery, I have not had any snack cakes period. I have actually no desire. Super sweet foods are sort of a turn off for me now. And I have had french fries but not every week or even every month, and when I did it was a small portion, not the super sized.

But other things that I enjoy now are walking outdoors/hiking/writing/photography etc. I've joined several meet up groups and am always exploring new things to do.

So yes the surgery is worth it. My only regret is not having it sooner.

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Oh my word! We have be sailing in the same boat! Im 3 weeks away from surgery. Everyday seems like the Last Supper. Not copious amounts of food, but whatever snack that I think I want to eat. I started to doubt that I wanted the surgery!

Honestly, I think that I had to mourn the loss of my old eating habits. I have given up soda and do not drink with meals to trying to prepare and trying not to eat candy, etc. I was just struggling from knowing I won't be able to snack incessantly. Thankfully this week, I am getting excited once again. I don't want to eat mindlessly anymore. I feel ready!

I think that I had to go through the emotions of giving up a part of me. I'm ready to change! I want this. I know it is a tool and not a magic wand. Maybe you, too, are going through emotions of the huge changes that lie ahead.

The decision is still yours to make!

Linda

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Oh my word! We have be sailing in the same boat! Im 3 weeks away from surgery. Everyday seems like the Last Supper. Not copious amounts of food, but whatever snack that I think I want to eat. I started to doubt that I wanted the surgery!

Honestly, I think that I had to mourn the loss of my old eating habits. I have given up soda and do not drink with meals to trying to prepare and trying not to eat candy, etc. I was just struggling from knowing I won't be able to snack incessantly. Thankfully this week, I am getting excited once again. I don't want to eat mindlessly anymore. I feel ready!

I think that I had to go through the emotions of giving up a part of me. I'm ready to change! I want this. I know it is a tool and not a magic wand. Maybe you, too, are going through emotions of the huge changes that lie ahead.

The decision is still yours to make!

Linda

Thank goodness I"m not the only one! I just got off a week long cruise and I think i tried at least one bite of every single thing that i saw! It's like I am stuck in the mindset that I will never be able to eat again! I am aware of it and am getting myself back on track with one month left until surgery. I feel like the fat is trying to steal me from my decision. The other day I found myself wondering what I am going to replace food with. Every weekend, every trip, every day has been an obsession over what I'm going to eat for so long that I'm not sure what I can enjoy as much as I have enjoyed eating all these years. I need to get a new hobby or interest - and quick!!!!

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Thank you to everyone who replied to my topic! Each of you truly helped me in some way in making a decision!

I'm very excited to say that I am getting the surgery on March 26th and I couldn't be happier! I look foward to my new lease on life :-)

If anyone else is considering it, I found out that its okay to not know... this is a huge deal. But if an oppurtunity presents itself, take it!

Good luck to everyone!

:) Lisa

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Had my sleeve 1/4/13 and its been a tough road, but i'm finally seeing the light! 60 pounds down!

I too did everything u guys mentioned-i put on 15 pounds getting ready for surgery and then backed out because i was scared!

The first two months are hard physically, but only because i felt sick, not hungry. after that u start to settle in quickly. You wont have cravings like u do now. Its hard to imagine, but true. I loved McDonalds, cant think of it now without gaging. You'll see the first 20 pounds drop and get so excited, you'll want to start being anorexic, in a good way, of course! u will have " mind hunger" only because the liquid weeks r the hardest, but once you get thru them, you ladies will be dancing the skinny jig!

This surgery isn't for everyone, but i was a binger and there was no other way i would have stopped myself! I see that now so clearly. Post op sickness initially made me have regrets. I wanted "off the ride", but now I see myself for what i had turned into...Hell, I still try to overeat, even through the sleeve, but the feeling of sickness stops me quickly. Thank goodness!

Good luck!

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I felt much the same way as you do. I made up my mind to do it so my family would stop worrying so much my many health issues. I knew I could do it pre-op. Then came post-op!! I went through major food withdrawals and mourned not eating everything in site. I would cry it was so bad!

Then about 2-3 weeks post-op it started to ease a little bit. Now that I'm coming up on 6 weeks I don't mourn a thing! Most of my old foods actually sound disgusting to me. My point is, you will be ok with this new way of life. It's tough, just like kicking any addiction, but once that is over its fun and exciting eating new healthy foods.

Remember, you will have your favorite foods again, if you want them. All in good time. As someone told me on here, what have those foods done for you? Made you fat and unhealthy! Why give them any more thought :)

Good luck on your journey. You will find a lot of support here to get you through the tough times!

All my best!

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Wow! All of your posts sound so much like me. I have my surgery in 10 days. I started my pre op diet Mon and doing well. I went through all that mourning of food before I started the pre op diet. Surgeon said I could have the surgery 4/8 but I changed it to 4/15 so I could eat at my 60th birthday party and while my relatives were here from out of town and then there was Easter. It was non stop last suppers with some guilt. I gained 10 lbs since seeing the surgeon. I kept thinking of all the things I wouldn't be able to eat any more. Even said I probably wouldn't go to any more buffets. I liked to go to buffets by myself so nobody would judge me on what I was eating. Me and food were best friends. Typing this is making me cry. I guess I am still mourning the loss of my best friend but I will be ok.

Mon I started the pre op diet and said no more cheating. Today is day 5 and I have lost the 10 lbs I gained over those 10 days. I was so worried that I wouldn't lose it all and would not be able to have surgery. I am now at the wgt I weighed at the surgeon's office. With 10 more days to go, I should be ok. I am totally following the pre op diet. No more cheating! I am 100% sure I am doing the right thing for me. I seem to be an all or nothing person and now I am all in for the surgery. I have waited years to do something and at 60 I better do something before it is too late.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I may go reread them if I start to have doubts. I know I am doing the right thing. I wasted a lot of time trying to figure it out. I think reading and preparing yourself helps. My bariartric team really explains every step. Sometimes I thought no way could I do this but then I would work through it and I would be ok with it. Each step was hard for me but now I am there and ready to have the surgery.

I wish my fellow sleevers good luck!

Karen

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