Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

No support from Gynecologist!



Recommended Posts

Ok so I had a appointment with my Gynecologist today and I spoke with her regarding the VSG surgery and my reasoning for wanting to do it (PCOS, endometriosis, high cholesterol, Achilles tendonitis and to become more heathy and build endurance and breathing). She says she does not support the surgery and strongly suggest that I dont have It because its the easy way out. She stated that I would appreciate it more if I did it without surgery. I just feel like no one knows the struggle of a overweight person until you have been. I was hurt because she didnt support me for she has been my doctor for 8 years and has helped me through somethings. She said that shebhas patients that have the surgery and are unhappy after 3 or more years because they gain the weight back. What do you do when someone who is a medical professional tell you their negative views? How do you refrain from running scared? I believe this is the right decision for me and I believe that this is just a tool to help not a permanent fix. I just dont want to regret my decision. Can I have some opinions please , would be greatly appreciated.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Any Dr. that took that attitude, would not be my Dr. much longer. People that take the attitude that this is easy, are super clueless. I am really surprised that she said that you would "appreciate it" more? Appreciate what exactly? Either through surgery or the old fashioned way, the result is still the same, you going to be MORE healthy. Is there a risk of regaining the weight? Sure, but isn't that the case if you took the weight off the old fashioned way? I mean hellooooo reality check here please. Stay strong here. If the surgery is going to help you, then stay with it. Drs. are just people with degrees, some have more smarts than others. Sounds like your's might have missed a class or do along the way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"appreciate it more . . " oh puleeze! That's ridiculous. That's a shame she wasn't supportive. As a doctor I'd think she'd support whatever path you took to be healthier. Sounds like she's pretty ignorant on WLS overall and the issues people who are overweight deal with.

What has your primary doctor said? And, just as with anything you can regain the weight, but you're more likely to be successful with than without WLS.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You're dr is not very professional. My PCP hated the fact that I went for the band (many times), but not once did he say I shouldn't do it. Only time he said anything was after the final time it was removed. After, He stated his opinion, but added that he is a health provider and is there to provide care for me in whatever ways I need it. Before I had lapband WLS , I never asked for his opinion therefore he didn't give it.

Unless it's for insurance reasons you don't need your OB/GYN personal approval so .. Don't sweat it. She's never had a problem so she may never care to understand.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

WOW. Just WOW. I didn't think doctors could be that ignorant.

-Kendra

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That is really sad, but not surprising as many doctors really have no clue to the real struggle with obesity and some of the reasons for it. If it was that "easy" and we all "appreciated" it more doing it our selves, we would all be skinny! The reality is, it just doesn't work that way. I have lost way many times, had to work my butt off to do it, only to gain it back and feel like a failure. I have maintained on the sleeve longer now than any diet I have ever been on. I am happy and healthy and that is what it really comes down to. This doctor of yours has obviously never struggled with her weight and is uneducated. If you want to approach the subject with her, give her information to read to help her really understand the surgery and obesity. Knowledge is power, and when we know better, we do better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I did not tell very many people before I had surgery, but I did discuss it with my internist and my gyn. I don't want to throw them under the bus, but neither were very supportive. My pcp really has not had much experience with patients having a sleeve and he was at least honest enough to say this. His experiences were related to lap-band and rny patients. His primary concern was (is) that I will gain back the weight. His comment to me was "your brain will find a way to make you eat". The next appt I had with the weight management MD, we discussed this exact possibility and his response was "Yes, you can gain back weight, but it is so much harder to do and you can get a handle on it much easier." Decision made. I didn't mention surgery to my ob-gyn until just a few days before I was to have surgery. Just as Msantiband said, I didn't need her approval, I was just keeping her in the loop as one of my providers. Her response was more neutral, but I didn't get the "great" I was hoping for.

I am sorry you didn't get the support and approval you were seeking. Unfortunately, physicians (especially specialists) often do not have any more knowledge about a topic out of their area of expertise than the general public. To many perpetuate prejudice and ignorance in relation to obesity and weight loss surgery and your experience demonstrated this. My advice is to ignore her. If you decide to keep her as a provider (since you did say she has helped you with other areas of your healthcare) then live your life as an example regarding how successful a vsg can be. Perhaps you will help to educate her and change her outlook. Your other option is to change ob-gyns. Do not for one minute think there aren't other great doctors in your area that will help with your gyn issues and provide the support you need as a wls patient.

Just remember...... She. Is. Wrong.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi I just have to chime in on this one. I understand that it is important.to have the support of the Dr.'s that are involved in your health care. However, some just will take the time to do the research. I am willing to bet you are more informed on this subject than this Dr. is....... The painful truth is we will not get support from 100% of the people in our lives...be it a Dr., friends or family. Sorry this Dr. let you down. As long as you know it is best for you than that is all you need. Best Wishes

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Easy I would like to see her do the Clear Liquids for 2 weeks, get a new doctor and keep it moving no need to take her thoughts into consideration.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I lost over 107 lbs several years ago and after an injury and depression and lack of support from weight loss plan regained about 80 lbs before deciding on surgery. My PCP has been so compassionate and helpless in helping me get a handle on my weight regain. I had already decided and started on qualifying for surgery before I told her. She knew nothing of VLS, but is so excited and supportive of the process and eager to learn more. I may have a hang up with insurance but she will be my ace in the hole if I need her. If I could have lost the weight the old fashion way I would have. It was a lot of work, but I felt so strong and confident and when I gained it back I felt defeated and weak. I don't want to feel like that one more minute. I am taking back my life and making a decision that will give me the support and best chance of success. Good luck and own your life!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

She is just stating her opinion and everyone does not have to agree with the choices that you make. I would thank her and advise her that I made my decision. They are physicians and are helpful, but the choice is yours. If she is a good physician I would continue to see her.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi guys thanks for the responses and advice. I think she is wls ignorant. She is a small petite doctor and she doesnt understand why it would be beneficial because she never has to go through it. My pcp is very understanding although he doesnt like the methods. He is willing to help me through the process. I agree either way u loose you have the chance of gaining back. Its all up to the individual self as to what your success is with either way you choose to become healthy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I did not tell very many people before I had surgery' date=' but I did discuss it with my internist and my gyn. I don't want to throw them under the bus, but neither were very supportive. My pcp really has not had much experience with patients having a sleeve and he was at least honest enough to say this. His experiences were related to lap-band and rny patients. His primary concern was (is) that I will gain back the weight. His comment to me was "your brain will find a way to make you eat". The next appt I had with the weight management MD, we discussed this exact possibility and his response was "Yes, you can gain back weight, but it is so much harder to do and you can get a handle on it much easier." Decision made. I didn't mention surgery to my ob-gyn until just a few days before I was to have surgery. Just as Msantiband said, I didn't need her approval, I was just keeping her in the loop as one of my providers. Her response was more neutral, but I didn't get the "great" I was hoping for.

I am sorry you didn't get the support and approval you were seeking. Unfortunately, physicians (especially specialists) often do not have any more knowledge about a topic out of their area of expertise than the general public. To many perpetuate prejudice and ignorance in relation to obesity and weight loss surgery and your experience demonstrated this. My advice is to ignore her. If you decide to keep her as a provider (since you did say she has helped you with other areas of your healthcare) then live your life as an example regarding how successful a vsg can be. Perhaps you will help to educate her and change her outlook. Your other option is to change ob-gyns. Do not for one minute think there aren't other great doctors in your area that will help with your gyn issues and provide the support you need as a wls patient.

Just remember...... She. Is. Wrong.[/quote']

Thank you soo much for this. ..you have excellent points. She has helped me and I will have my surgery and become an example to show her that its not as negative as she believes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I lost over 107 lbs several years ago and after an injury and depression and lack of support from weight loss plan regained about 80 lbs before deciding on surgery. My PCP has been so compassionate and helpless in helping me get a handle on my weight regain. I had already decided and started on qualifying for surgery before I told her. She knew nothing of VLS' date=' but is so excited and supportive of the process and eager to learn more. I may have a hang up with insurance but she will be my ace in the hole if I need her. If I could have lost the weight the old fashion way I would have. It was a lot of work, but I felt so strong and confident and when I gained it back I felt defeated and weak. I don't want to feel like that one more minute. I am taking back my life and making a decision that will give me the support and best chance of success. Good luck and own your life![/quote']

That sounds good to me. "Own your life"! I have been through sooo much! My dads sickness, stress and drama work, my brother being diagnosed with schizophrenia, loss of a great friend/sister of breast cancer. I felt as if nothing was in my controll. The only thing I realized that I can control is ME! So yes I will own MY life with the best choices for me! Thank you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm sorry you got that response frome her... As others have said, not everyone will agree and many are not informed... My OBGYN is actually the reason I had my surgery, we had a long talk about my weight and his concerns about my fertility since I was recently married and he referred me to my surgeon... Good luck!! I hope you Have lots of success and give her a real example of wls... As they say, success is the best "revenge" ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 2 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×