Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

I want to help my friends but i can't



Recommended Posts

My coworkers are killing me. All day long all they talk about is weight loss, eating right and getting in shape. They're talking about it right now. They ask for my opinion and I mention low carbs and logging their food....but nooooooo, that's too much trouble. They say they just want to "watch their portions." Does that work? Who here hasn't tried that? I watched my portions for 40 years...watched them get bigger and bigger. All I can do is wish them the best.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah that doesn't work for me. Unless I see it in a log it's to hard to keep track of. Even with the sleeve my eyes are bigger than my stomach. I don't pull out nearly as much as I used to before surgery, but it is usually still a bit to much.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Never worked for me. I don't know how you watch your portions without tracking and measuring. You need to measure at least a few times to figure out what a serving size is on most things. All you can do is suggest, hopefully they are successful. If not, maybe they will take your suggestions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Most people who "watch their portions" have no idea what a portion should be.

Even my husband, who has never had a weight problem, was amazed when I talked to him about his portions of Pasta and rice.

I don't see a practical way for you to demonstrate to them that won't come off as preachy, but the one thing that really hammered home my out of control portion sizes was seeing the models of what a portion of each food should look like. I'd heard the "deck of cards" and "fist sized" thing before but actually seeing how much larger (and grotesque) my portions were impacted me.

It didn't help me lose the weight but it was a piece of info I carried with me and the comparisons are easy to visualize.

In any case, you can't change a person's mind or attitude about anything. When someone really wants to lose weight, and by that, I mean they want to lose weight more than they want to keep eating, they'll do the work and find a way to eat healthier. Most people (even sleevers are guilty of this) want to keep eating the same horrible way but lose the weight. It's why people flock in droves to by miracle pills to help shed weight but never adopt the simple habits that would probably help without the side effects.

~Cheri

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had some very obese relatives talk to me about the weight loss. The number one advice I gave them (in their 20s very very very high BMI) is to just stop gaining weight. Make that a priority - I can think of all the weights I was at that if I had just STOPPED right there, i would never have needed surgery.I

It is such an individual journey, there frankly isn't much we can do for others until they are ready to make fundamental changes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think like everyone else said..people are curious about people who are successful, but do they really want to do what it is necessary..probably not...especially if its going to be remotely difficult. You know..my turning point was the diagnosis of pre-diabetes..why I thought high cholesterol and high blood pressure was "ok"...I can take a pill..but watching family members die from complications of diabetes..was serious for me. So until they have the OMG moment...they won't change..but I bet you are inspiring people to look at themselves and you may just be a catalyst for their own self discovery and change!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

there are folks even on this board who when I mentioned that I count out almonds and weigh, measure and log my food told me that I was too consumed by it all and why don't I just eyeball things. I told them that it takes maybe 5 minutes to log the food and 20 minutes to prepare and pack my food and Snacks for the next workday. I told them: "What's the big deal about less than half and hour out of my life to make sure I'm on track?"

I wasn't ready to hear anything until I finally had that "Straw that broke the camel's back" moment. Then I started asking REAL questions for REAL and not just complaining.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I weighed everything in the beginning because you cannot be sure what you're eating otherwise. One of my issues prior to surgery was overeating and grazing. It would be too easy for me to eat the entire bag of almonds mindlessly while reading a book or watching the boob tube.

How else can you accurately track your calories? Guesstimating? That's not much help, is it?

Being consumed by surgery and healthy eating? I'd argue that it's paying attention to what I'm putting in my body, something that might have prevented my obesity in the first place. If you're willing to have life altering surgery and remove an organ, you should probably be willing to invest at least a few minutes each day into the other parts of the equation: what you put in your body, and how much/why you're putting it there.

Now that I'm so far out I seldom actually need to break out the scale, though every now and again I do it just to check myself. But if I'm going to indulge in a junky food, like those flamin hot cheetos I ate last night (something I'd normally avoid but sounded oh so good to me) you better bet your hind end I'm counting out the 21 cheetos that make up a portion. No way will I allow myself to eat the whole bag like I used to.

Oh, and I only ate ten of them and put the rest back. I think I just wanted something spicy and would have been just as satisfied with a scrambled egg covered in hot sauce. chips and the like never went stale in my house prior to surgery, but it's something we have to watch out for now. :)

~Cheri

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wasn't ready to hear anything until I finally had that "Straw that broke the camel's back" moment. Then I started asking REAL questions for REAL and not just complaining.

You just gave me an epiphany. I think my coworkers are really just complaining rather than sincerely asking for help. I don't know why I didn't recognize that before....I'm an expert on complaining.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My coworkers are killing me. All day long all they talk about is weight loss' date=' eating right and getting in shape. They're talking about it right now. They ask for my opinion and I mention low carbs and logging their food....but nooooooo, that's too much trouble. They say they just want to "watch their portions." Does that work? Who here hasn't tried that? I watched my portions for 40 years...watched them get bigger and bigger. All I can do is wish them the best.[/quote']

You could just explain a portion is in terms of ounces, either weigh with a scale or volume with measuring cups. For us, it started at 1-3 ounces and advanced to more over time. For them, it would be a higher number of ounces and will give them an opportunity to eating more healthy too by making better food choices. After all, how often are they going to be measuring out brownies, cake, ice cream, etc without being reminded of why they are measuring. Just a thought.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes....it is amazing that friends are so interested and conversant about weight loss with me now. They want to know what the "tricks" are and same as you, when I talk about getting high protein/low carb in, and logging food, they mostly find reasons why that is too much work or why it won't work for them. Oh well....we were there once. Best to just let it go, I guess. Everyone's journey is personal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wasn't ready to hear anything until I finally had that "Straw that broke the camel's back" moment. Then I started asking REAL questions for REAL and not just complaining.

You just gave me an epiphany. I think my coworkers are really just complaining rather than sincerely asking for help. I don't know why I didn't recognize that before....I'm an expert on complaining.

Just wondering how your going after all this time. Is it easy for you to maintain this far out ?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't been to work in over a month and a half, but we are a very tight knit bunch since we work in a highly stressful environment, I have been lucky to have such an extended support group, most of my nurses, and co- workers do cardio, weight training or crossfit, I do get upset when I get the occasional "oh I hope you don't get like ######, she's already fat again" or "was it easy???", but once people started to see my results and I posted pics, a lot of it turned into being asked about my diet and food choices, I did take a couple of my nurses serious since they went out of their way to text and call me for information on using my kitchen scale, how I do low carb, and one of them even called me all weekend once because she went out and bought a Wok, and wanted to learn to stir fry, that was my midlife crisis gift until she becomes a doctor, then I get the obligatory new vehicle, lol, when you hear people talking and complaining it is because it's "the flavor of the week" but when one of them is sincere try to help, I believe in paying it forward, I try to be humble buy I'm really feeding off the whole

"Wow your looking awesome" humble humble humble!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×