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I feel like such a failure



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I was sleeved almost 3 months ago and I'm already gaining weight back. I have gone through 2 stalls that lasted 4 weeks each which makes me very frustrated. The weight should have been falling off of me since I have to lose so much but instead my sleeve seems to be stretched out so I eat way too much. I just want to give up, I guess I was meant to be a blimp the rest of my life. I come on here to learn from others but instead I just get really depressed since everyone is doing so well.

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What do you believe caused your sleeve to stretch? I am on my 6th week and still can't eat a whole meal.

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Are you sure it is stretched or are you eating incorrectly? I would go back to the basics and start over. Are you drinking enough Water? I didn't think the sleeve could stretch. I was told they cut out the stretchy part. Maybe others had some thoughts on this.

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How many calories are you eating each day? How much Protein and how many carbs? That's what you need to track. The sleeve is just a tool. You still have to follow a proper diet or it's not going to work.

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i was told your sleeve cannot stretch.it can only relax a little over time but definitely not in the first three months.maybe ur calorie intake is high?i would talk to the dr and let him know whats going on

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Butterthebean...has a link to a great article on stalls. Im on wk 3 and have stalled already. I was upset until I read the article. I'm just going to concentrate on getting my Protein and fluids in. I'm not going to look at the scale for now. I met a lady that didn't get her Protein in so a peg tube was placed...well I refuse to go there! I hope you start losing soon!!

hugs,<br />alma

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The past two weeks I have been eating a few bad things but still trying to get all my Protein in. I have been on so many diets and can't handle the scale not moving, I get really depressed if my efforts aren't getting me anywhere. I average 60 grams of Protein a day but my doctor wants me to have 90 grams. I have to just suck it up and drink nasty Protein shakes since I don't eat fish and not big on meat. I gave in to my diet coke addiction so that is probably why my stomach has stretched. Some days I get full quickly but last night had a piece of pizza and didn't feel full :-( Going back to basics today and try to shrink my stomach.

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Don't give up! The sleeve can work for u if u work the sleeve. I sometimes feel scared that I can eat too much food. I find that if I am eating Protein first I become full faster and don't eat as much and I stay full longer. I try to do this when I feel like I can eat too much or if I haven't seen the scale move etc. I can eat a whole PB and j sandwich- that's a lot of food IMO. But it's carbs! I can eat a whole lot more carby foods in one sitting- this is why they r called slider foods.

Hang in there! Try not to get discouraged and go back to Protein first and drink ur Water.

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I typically weigh myself every 3 weeks so I don't get discouraged. After 3 weeks I so far have always lost weight. I am at 3 & 1/2 months out and I am starting to lack motivation in being off sugar, I found out unfortunately that I don't have the dumping syndrome so I have been eating skinny cow icecream. I ate 3 in one day and feel like I can't stop. I know I need to throw them away. Anyone else had this experience and made it back to the "good side"?

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You aren't meant to be a blimp, and you haven't failed. You are at the beginning of a very long journey.

How much weight have you gained? It is normal to fluctuate up and down. Just because you aren't losing as fast as you planned, doesn't mean it isn't working.

When I was five months out and 60lbs down and could look back at my success, I realized that I should have never worried about how much I was or wasn't loosing in those first few months.

You said you ate a slice of pizza and were not full. Was your stomach full? Or was your head not full? Feeling hungry and having a full stomach are different. It could be that you need to work on your head.

I posted this for someone else earlier today:

About 8 weeks after surgery, I could eat just about anything I wanted in smaller portions. If I just eat smaller portions and cut out the Snacks, I will lose weight because I have so much to lose. On the other hand, if I cut the carbs and greatly increase my Protein and Water, I will lose weight much faster. All of this was true before and after surgery.

Here is where you have a personal choice to make. You can lose weight faster or slower depending on which route you chose to go. Personally, I don't feel that either route is right or wrong. The one thing you MUST do is figure out how to be healthier for a life time.

I can eat the same things as before, but I also chose not to do so. I made a choice to use the sleeve as a tool to correct the bad habits that led me to this point in my life. Since I am not starving and having cravings all the time, I use it to make better choices. Before surgery, I ate a lot of fast food, drank nothing but soda or sweet tea, and could eat candy, chips, ice cream or Pasta as a meal (often my only 'meal' of the day). (I also hate eating meat and protein) Now, I get in a Protein shake in the morning mixed with my coffee. For other meals, I eat my Protein first, veggies second, fruit third, and treats (breads, sweets, etc) last if there is room. I rarely skip a meal. I drink more Water and less soda. I do have a treat most days of the week - half can of soda, part of a candy bar, some ice cream. I take my Vitamins. I move my body more. This is what works for me. I know I could lose a lot more weight if I was a more diligent, but I am not in a hurry.

So what if you aren't getting in a full 90g of Proteins. Averaging 60g is pretty good. Figure out how you can get that up to 65 next week. Keep pushing forward. Find protein you do like and fill up.

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I know I need to throw them away. Anyone else had this experience and made it back to the "good side"?

YES! YES! YES!

Allow yourself to have a treats, but bring them home in limited amounts. You know yourself. You know what you can and can't handle. Don't bring home things that you can't handle.

One of the benefits of the sleeve is that you can't quit being sleeved.

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It really sounds as if you are having trouble making the lifestyle changes that have to be made for the surgery to work. We all know how hard it is so don't fear our judgment! Just work on your head. Then work some more.

Sugar has always and will always be my demon. I didn't eat fast food, chips, dips, alcohol and so many other fattening things. Just sugar.

And here it is in my first post-op holiday season, and candy and Cookies and such are lying around everywhere at work. My eyes are drawn to it every time I pass. My arm actually moves to reach toward it. I will NOT let that damn sugar undo me! I will allow myself ONE piece of candy per day from now through Christmas Eve. On Christmas Day I will drink nog with my man. Then NO MORE.

I have been successful, in my eyes, because I do not deny myself everything, but I absolutely CONTROL the exceptions to my normal dietary plan.

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Remember, your goal isn't to feel full. You mention

The past two weeks I have been eating a few bad things but still trying to get all my Protein in. I have been on so many diets and can't handle the scale not moving, I get really depressed if my efforts aren't getting me anywhere. I average 60 grams of Protein a day but my doctor wants me to have 90 grams. I have to just suck it up and drink nasty Protein shakes since I don't eat fish and not big on meat. I gave in to my diet coke addiction so that is probably why my stomach has stretched. Some days I get full quickly but last night had a piece of pizza and didn't feel full :-( Going back to basics today and try to shrink my stomach.

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Okay you ate 1 slice of pizza. But it wasn't the whole pizza and let's be honest... most of us here could order a whole pizza just for ourselves before this surgery. So your stomach isn't stretched.

You said that after your 1 slice you weren't full. That's okay!! The key is were you hungry still? The goal isn't to be full after every meal... it's to not be hungry after your meal.

Here's what I do. I'm 2 months out and it works well. I portion out my meal and then eat half. Sit it down and wait. If I don't feel hungry I don't finish the second half and if I am feeling hungry then I do. This largely depends on the consistency of what I am eating too. Chili vs. chicken fill me up very differently.

Also if you are gaining during the first 3 months consider the type of food you are eating. Pizza isn't the best diet food.< /p>

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I gained 7 pounds in 1 week but not sure if it was because I lost a lot the 2 week before. My weight loss has been crazy which doesn't help me at all. The first 3 weeks I lost 19 pounds then I didn't lose anything for 5 weeks, then for 2 weeks I lost 2 or 3 pounds every day. Tomorrow will be 3 months and I have lost 36 pounds which isn't too bad but when I read people my size are losing 60-90 pounds the first 3 months it drives me crazy.

Yes, pizza is not a good diet food and I have messed up a lot lately but I will go back to what I know. I use to eat smart ones but my NUT doesn't want me to eat preservatives, this is hard when I can't cook. I never know what to eat anymore, she has me on a 1,000 calorie diet which seems like a lot compared to how much others eat but it's obviously less than I use to eat.

I may not have been mentally ready for surgery but didn't have a choice. I was diagnosed with a head condition which doctors don't know what causes it but find its mostly overweight women in childbearing age that get it. The Fluid surrounding my brain doesn't drain down the spine like its suppose to so everyday when the body makes more Fluid it puts pressure on my eyes. I was having spinal taps every 3 months and losing my vision on top of taking medicine that made me lose my memory.

I have to lose this weight and need to find the strength to fight off all temptations, I just wish I was one of the people that the weight just fell off.

Thank you all for the suggestions and support!

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Doughgurl

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      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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