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Telling Wveryone Or No One



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I took several weeks off work' date=' then came back and lost 125 pounds in less than 5 months. There is no way people weren't going to guess I had surgery. So I tell everyone who asks. I haven't heard anything negative.[/quote']

I am not going to "keep it a secret". I will tell everyone after the fact. As soon as I mention it, the first thing I hear are going to be the horror stories and how bad an idea this is and how dangerous the surgery is and on and on and on. Get the idea.

All I have to do is tell my mother-in-law and she will yell it from the rooftop. I don't want that. In fact if I can I would rather not "ever" tell her. But that is not possible. You heard the old saying-"telephone, telegraph and tell a woman?" Get my drift?

All kidding aside, I have my consult on 10/11 and until this is over it will be just my hubby, my daughter and the doc's office.

Thanks so much for the advice and concerns and of course I will keep you all updated.

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-"telephone, telegraph and tell a woman?"

In my neighborhood it was -"telephone, telegraph and tell Mrs. Showers"

She was the viral video of our day. :huh:

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Hi

I am not sleeved yet, will not be until January because of staffing issues at work. I will be self pay and going to Mexico. After much research and thought I decided to go ahead with the sleeve back in June, and at first I told no one except hubby (whom I had been discussing it with) and my two kids. The support I get from them is great. I have told a few close friends, mostly those who have had the band with good success and they too are very supportive, they too understand completely why I am going this route. I have also told my brother and sister in law in the hopes that he would consider it, as he is in the same boat as I, with many more health problems of a much more serious nature - he is thinking hard about it but I think he is waiting to see how it goes with me! I will not tell my parents or my sister because I know that they would be horrified, I know my sister would think it is purely cosmetic and not understand. I have also hinted at my intentions to a few others who were also horrified. I try to explain that I am considering it for health reasons, they don't get it.

I try my best to subscribe to the "you can't please everyone, so please yourself and the ones you love" motto. In the beginning I was so excited about my decision I wanted to tell everyone but after a few negative reactions I will not be telling anyone else for now.

I have decided that after the surgery if anyone asks specifically, I will tell them. If they ask why, I will tell them. I agree with many previous posts that it is my decision, made for my own reasons, and as I typically try not to judge anyone else, I will not accept the judgement of others, God alone will be my judge.

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I just want to say to everyone here who has not been sleeved (and you may already know this), when you start losing weight people are going to be coming out of the wood work to congratulate you and tell you how good you look. And the next words out of their mouth will almost always be "how did you do it?" Answer that however you please, and I am passing no judgement or giving no advice. I just want you all to be prepared for that question to be asked 1000 times, because everyone is hoping you will tell them some super secret easy method that they have never heard of.

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It is completely up to you! Whatever you feel comfortable with. I'm still in the approval process, but most of my family, friends, and Co-workers know that I intend to have this surgery. I've had mixed responses, but most have been supportive. The bottom line is that nobody has to live inside your body except you so it doesn't really matter what anyone says. You want to be healthy and you want to look good! Do what you feel is right for you. as for those that won't support your decision, just thank then for their input and let them know the topic is off the table for discussion of they are going to be a constant voice of doubt. They should respect your choices for your life, even if they don't agree with or understand them.

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I told limited people before I went to Mexico. I was sick of hearing everyone say I was crazy for getting it done and going to Mexico. When I got back with zero complication I told everyone. I like to tell my story to maybe help someone else out since most people are not aware of the sleeve.

I like you skyjack. You tell it like it is. I have been keeping up with your beer question!! ;)

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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