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If You Had The Choice - Would You Do It Again?



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Absolutely NOT, glad to hear all the success stories keep up good work, but there is no way I would do this to myself nor my family if I had it to do again. Ok I am 41 3kids and married. 5'4 286# was my highest weight had surgery july 24th tired all the time, cant sleep except flat on my bk. Living in fear what to eat what to drink, worry more about food than I ever have, gas only have 1bm a week. Scared to enjoy myself outside bc leaks n infections, scared to be intimate with spouse besides no sdrive. Skin dry had to go to er heart problems never had heart problems before. No if loosing weight was going to make me miserable and suck all enjoyment out of living. I would rather be fat and happy. N yes I was happy. I had the surgery bc I wanted to be healthy an enjoy life more. All I had was Migraines, guess what I still do. Plus heart issues only since surgery. Each person has their on opinion, this is just mine. My mother was considering it I said no. I will walk with her cook for her, join gym with her just plz no. so yes I have lost 40# but there is no other up side for me. So be sure to consider all options and whatever your choice is it is the rest of your life.. Good luck.

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Absolutely NOT' date=' glad to hear all the success stories keep up good work, but there is no way I would do this to myself nor my family if I had it to do again. Ok I am 41 3kids and married. 5'4 286# was my highest weight had surgery july 24th tired all the time, cant sleep except flat on my bk. Living in fear what to eat what to drink, worry more about food than I ever have, gas only have 1bm a week. Scared to enjoy myself outside bc leaks n infections, scared to be intimate with spouse besides no sdrive. Skin dry had to go to er heart problems never had heart problems before. No if loosing weight was going to make me miserable and suck all enjoyment out of living. I would rather be fat and happy. N yes I was happy. I had the surgery bc I wanted to be healthy an enjoy life more. All I had was Migraines, guess what I still do. Plus heart issues only since surgery. Each person has their on opinion, this is just mine. My mother was considering it I said no. I will walk with her cook for her, join gym with her just plz no. so yes I have lost 40# but there is no other up side for me. So be sure to consider all options and whatever your choice is it is the rest of your life.. Good luck.[/quote']

How far out from surgery are you?

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Almost 4 wks. Everyone says it will get better, but even at your best your life revolves around food, reading labels n praying that u dont vomit. And sugar free everything. Yuk..... Rt now I just hate my choice I was never a big eater which I was told that y im over weight pepsi and late night eating after going all day without. Now im still going all day without. It is heartbreaking and frustrating, ppl should no the ups n the downs at this point there are more downs for me...

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I really do hope things get better for you!

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I had my surgery 2 months ago and I have lost 62 lbs, and even with the pain from surgery and a stitch I popped inside by my belly button which was very painfull, I would still do it over again!!!! I am 47 and I was not living, I was in so much pain every day from carrying around 334 lbs, had sleep apneia, had heart problems, was on blood pressure meds, and my legs and ankles swelled every day, I was miserable!! This surgery gave me my life back, I have my sex drive back and it has been gone for a long time, I have been married for 32 years and would not let my husband touch me because I was so ashamed of what I had done to myself. You have to make the decision for yourself but I can say 100% it was worth every penny I paid for this surgery (my insurance did not pay a dime on anything!)

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I'm 5'1" and so I have to be 132 to be a normal BMI. Yes, what I've lost is great, but it would be even better to be normal one day and not overweight. It is depressing that the weight loss has frozen.

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NO. I would have the gastric bypass instead. Everyone I was in support groups pre-op who had the same amount of weight to lose as me (1 year ago) is already smaller than me. My weight loss has stopped and theirs has not. I may never be a normal BMI and they will or already are. Lots of regret....but on the flipside, I was 233 and now I'm 145. Just not "normal" in the BMI yet.

Hi Sue! I was wondering how tall you are? You have got to be getting pretty close. And you still might be able hit your goal. Most sleeve studies show best excess weight loss at 18-24 months post op. And after about 3-5 years the % of excess weight lost from gastric bypass and the sleeve look to be about the same. I wish you all of the best. I know it's disheartening and yes bypass people lose faster but they don't necessarily keep it off longer since the weight loss evens out.

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I'm 5'1" and so I have to be 132 to be a normal BMI. Yes, what I've lost is great, but it would be even better to be normal one day and not overweight. It is depressing that the weight loss has frozen.

On the positive side, you are only 13 lbs away! Aside from not reaching a magic number, (of which BMI is a range and not always 100% correct) how do you feel? How do you feel you look in your clothes? There are people in my support group who have had bypass that look downright gaunt and unhealthy. I would not want to be there. There are others who have stretched their stomas (correct spelling) and are gaining their weight back. The grass is not always greener...even though it may seem that way sometimes. Your signature has a great line that says :"The best goals reached are the ones hardest earned" If your goal is to lose those last 13 pounds, then go back and redouble your efforts and you will get there! Look at what you are eating, how much you are exercising etc and see if you need to shake things up a bit. I hope this is coming across more as a pep talk than a lecture. You didn't ask for advice, only stated your opinion to the question. I just hate to see you so disappointed when you are so close! :)

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On the positive side, you are only 13 lbs away! Aside from not reaching a magic number, (of which BMI is a range and not always 100% correct) how do you feel? How do you feel you look in your clothes? There are people in my support group who have had bypass that look downright gaunt and unhealthy. I would not want to be there. There are others who have stretched their stomas (correct spelling) and are gaining their weight back. The grass is not always greener...even though it may seem that way sometimes. Your signature has a great line that says :"The best goals reached are the ones hardest earned" If your goal is to lose those last 13 pounds, then go back and redouble your efforts and you will get there! Look at what you are eating, how much you are exercising etc and see if you need to shake things up a bit. I hope this is coming across more as a pep talk than a lecture. You didn't ask for advice, only stated your opinion to the question. I just hate to see you so disappointed when you are so close! :)

Thank you for the encouragement and much-needed pep talk. I am much smaller now, so I SHOULD be happy! I would love to see "normal" one day, so I WILL redouble efforts and get back to basics. :-)

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Hi Sue! I was wondering how tall you are? You have got to be getting pretty close. And you still might be able hit your goal. Most sleeve studies show best excess weight loss at 18-24 months post op. And after about 3-5 years the % of excess weight lost from gastric bypass and the sleeve look to be about the same. I wish you all of the best. I know it's disheartening and yes bypass people lose faster but they don't necessarily keep it off longer since the weight loss evens out.

I am 5'1" and it probably seems like I'm whining, but I really want to be in that "normal" BMI range. It is SO close but frustrating that the weight loss has stopped. I'm going to get back to basics and track everything I put into my mouth. I injured my hip a few months ago and was unable to run. The ortho doc and PT said I still cannot run, but can start walking now. Maybe it will pick up with excercise. THank you for the motivation!

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Absolutely NOT, glad to hear all the success stories keep up good work, but there is no way I would do this to myself nor my family if I had it to do again. Ok I am 41 3kids and married. 5'4 286# was my highest weight had surgery july 24th tired all the time, cant sleep except flat on my bk. Living in fear what to eat what to drink, worry more about food than I ever have, gas only have 1bm a week. Scared to enjoy myself outside bc leaks n infections, scared to be intimate with spouse besides no sdrive. Skin dry had to go to er heart problems never had heart problems before. No if loosing weight was going to make me miserable and suck all enjoyment out of living. I would rather be fat and happy. N yes I was happy. I had the surgery bc I wanted to be healthy an enjoy life more. All I had was Migraines, guess what I still do. Plus heart issues only since surgery. Each person has their on opinion, this is just mine. My mother was considering it I said no. I will walk with her cook for her, join gym with her just plz no. so yes I have lost 40# but there is no other up side for me. So be sure to consider all options and whatever your choice is it is the rest of your life.. Good luck.

I'm sorry to hear that you feel so awful. I hope things will turn around soon. I'd be willing to bet good money that you will be singing a whole different tune not too long from now. Things GET BETTER!! And so will you, so hang in there and BELIEVE! :)

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3 months 4 days post op. Honestly, I 100% regret it right now. I've spent a decent amount of time over 5 stays in the hospital. Spleen complication, white cell count/enzymes sky rocketed, salvatory infection and my face blew up, jaundice, leak, stent to fix the leak, gall bladder removal, stent complication. Not trying to scare you, but I wish I had not blown off complications as something that would never happen to me. There were many days I don't remember, and many nights I slept with my face in a bucket wishing I would just die already, not even caring that I'm only 25. Feeling horrible for what my fiancé family and friends had to watch/go through. I never realized how much this surgery effects others as well until I was sick as a dog, one test after another, and drs shrugging their shoulders. Yeah, I'm 54# down, but I wish I just tried 1 more time to just watch my diet and exorcize. I was pretty healthy per med standards for my weight (246). Now I can't stand for a minute or 2 without being exhausted. I stand up and things go fuzzy for a few seconds. I'm still primarily on full liquids, and can't seem to quench my thirst.

My advice is make sure you're truly ready. Try to watch your diet and exorsize, the surgery is not a magic pull, you still have to do it afterward anyway. I didn't take it seriously enough, make sure you do and you're prepared mentally for it. If it does by any chance, most importantly, cry if you have to, scream if you have to, but look towards the future. That's what keeps me going, I know one day I'll look back and go d*mn, I'm a survivor, but I'm doing d*mn good!!! Even in the beginning most people have a "buyers remorse" and it'll help you through that too. We're all the little engine that could :)

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I want to say THANK YOU to all of you who have posted. Your stories are an inspiration to all of us out here who have had difficulties and those who continue to suffer from unexpected complications.

Living one day at a time and making it better than the day before,

Rhonda

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I will look back and go d*mn, I'm a survivor, but I'm doing d*mn good!!!

regarding post #73

RqwrrAshlee3

sad you have gone through many complications these past 3 months , jaundice, leak, stent and gall bladder removal etc. :( referring to post above #73

impressed that after all of the above - you see the light at the end of the tunnel. your optimistic feelings ring loud and clear :)

many people on the board say"things do get better" - its true , in all honesty we can't forget there are people like you who have delt with many problems - but i see you as getting stronger from what you've gone through :)

your positive attitude shines , and you want/need to succeed in getting better, taking full advantage of your new tool the sleeve, it will become your best friend as you heal and after

wishes for your improving health, recovery, and enjoying your new sleeve ;)

good luck

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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