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"you're Fat (And That's The Cause Of All Your Problems)"



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This just makes me so angry on behalf of you and all overweight people. I went to a doctor one time and said, "I'm having a lot of hand pain." He said, "Lose weight and that will get better." I looked at him with disbelief and replied rather sarcastically, "Excuse me, but I don't walk on my hands." Another time, I had fallen on the ice and could barely walk. I went to the doc and he said it was arthritis and I'd just have to live with it. Miraculously, my "arthritis" was completely healed in about 8 weeks with no medical help whatsoever! Unforunately, treatment like this caused me to stop going to doctors, and I have many permanent problems now that I may have been able to head off if I had been seen earlier. Don't give in to being dismissed and lectured! Insist on tests and proper diagnosis!

Its a miracle!!!! dumbass doctors

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Heh. Yeah.. I recently had a total hysterectomy, at the age of 32... because I was allowed to lay in a hospital for almost a week with a burst dremoid ovarian cyst. The doctors at the hospital insisted that I was constipated due to being "so overweight" and that was causing my pain and fever. They eventually discharged me with a script for some colace. I went straight to another hospital and almost straight into emergency surgery. One would have thought that this was the end of my drama, but no.... When the estrogen they gave me post op wasn;t working for my menopause symptoms, I was told that my issues were not hormonal, that the hot flashes were caused by my weight! I marched to my PCP, who gave me a different hormone med, and miraculously, the issue resolved. I'm SO SICK of this all. In fact, I plan to get to goal, and go to my yearly with the gynecologist who did this to me, just so I can tell her off, and walk out.

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Sorry your doc was such a b*tch about it. Mine was a real charmer but still brought be back to the same issue, blood pressure, blood sugar, shoulder pain, back pain arm pain, knee pain, adrenal gland issues, low testosterone, shortness of breath, dry patchy skin - all had roots or were the direct result of being obese. Now that I've lost 170+ pounds it's all gone away.

It's too bad more docs can't be the way moine was, gentle, caring yet truthful. It's hard to be that without being a doctor, having to see people all day who a majority probably have weight issues just makes it tougher. Take it, as they say, with a grain of salt. If it really, really bugs you or you think it's really inappropriate then see about switching docs.

We al wish you the best of luck on your journey.

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Yes, doctors generally do not have good bedside manners and are jerks (in my book). BUT, that being said I do understand why they do it. I don't agree with it, and I do feel like they tend to ignore other things going on when they see obese patients. Weight is a huge health issue, and yes so many ailments can be helped by losing it. And I know they see so many overweight patients, and the old saying says, "When you hear hoovesteps, think horses, not zebras!"

Still, I lost count of how many times I cried myself all the way home from doctor's offices. How many times I went in for pain, and left untreated to resolve by myself. The worst of the bunch was my ortho surgeon. I feel down on concrete stairs and slammed my right knee in 2007. From day one, she was a total b***h to me about my weight. She barely believed me when I told her I weighed 135lbs at my college graduation in May 2004. I tense up and have anxiety every time I have to go back for a check up because she harps on it every time I go. But little do they understand my knee is a big reason I struggled the past 5 years -- the pain when I try to take up a new exercise regimine is horrific and dibilitating. So this time, I'm taking matters to the next level by getting my sleeve. I'm pushing through the pain now, icing my knee every night. My last MRI 3 weeks ago show a lot of inflammation in the cartiledge and a few arthritic cysts.

I go in for my check up last week and she starts in on the weight thing and I said, "I had VSG two weeks ago." She blinked, not knowing what that was. She asked details, and when I told her the diet restrictions she then proceeded to barade me about, "Well that doesn't sound healthy at all! I don't think that's the right way to do it."

There is no pleasing her -- AND I DON'T CARE!!

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...all medical professionals seem to say to me....

Now, are they SAYING that? Or is that just what I'm HEARING?

A rant:

I sat down today with a primary care physican/internist to ask about a consistent, aching knot that has been living in my right shoulder blade for about 5 years. I figure it is from stress, or tension, or improper posture, or poor ergonomics at work. Sometimes a massage helps, but it never works it all the way out. I wanted some medical info on this, to see if massage really helps with muscle tension/pain, but what did I get instead?

A lecture. On being overweight. About how my gut and my boobs are too big, and how that causes back pain....

But wait, doc! I was asking about a knot in my shoulder! And I'm exercising, eating healthy, and having VSG in a few months! Can you please give me some actual advice relating to my shoulder pain?! She just kept veering back to the weight issue. Because, for me, it's hard to try to stand up to a doctor, and I'm usually not the one steering the conversation.

She eventually told me to try some Vitamin D or a heating pad. OK, fine. I'll try that. But I feel like I'm WELL aware of all of the detrimental effects of obesity. That's why I'm trying to get the weight off! Sometimes, I just want a doctor to give me an answer, and not relate it to the one medical issue I am fighting tooth and nail.

Thanks for letting me rant, VSG Talk friends. I feel better :)

(HUGS)

SF

Ya, you could go in with a gunshot wound and they'd tell you to lose weight and exercise. Go to a chiropractor. I had the same knot, and it would SPASM all the time. It was bad. It was coming from my neck which was horribly out of alignment. Mine is 100% better now. My chiro never said ONE word about my weight. He knows I know I'm overweight and what that means. My two cents...

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It took me 5 years of switching doctors almost constantly before I landed with the PCP I have now. She is awesome, supportive, willing to listen. Best of all, she thinks my weight comes from my hormonal and metabolic issues, NOT from being a fat, lazy, eating machine. Once I found her, I was able to get on the right meds to stop gaining, though losing is still really hard if not impossible. She feels that the sleeve is almost necessary, because I won;t be able to eat little enough for my slow metabolism to allow me to lose without hunger. I think about of people are like me, and doctors just don't want to admit that we can't all fit into the same mold. Some of us are square pegs...

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I'd like to mention that I too had a slew of aches and pains all over my body when I was larger. They are all gone now... so I just wanted to put it out there that YES it can be due to being overweight/obese.

I think it is helpful to try to reconcile with what our health professionals are trying to tell us rather than constantly pushing them away simply because they are telling us something we don't want to hear. For me, it has turned out to all be denial.

I'm NOT saying it CAN'T be something else... rather it IS a possibility it is, and it serves no purpose to deny it simply because it's not what we wanted to hear.

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There is a difference between weight related health issues that should be addressed by healthcare professionals and outright size discrimination. I think most of what the people described here was clearly size discrimination. Sorry, but you go to a doctor to TREAT your pain or illness. If they are unwilling to do so because of your size, then that is discrimination and they are not doing their jobs. These doctors make fat people unwilling to seek medical attention. This is something that needs to be addressed and I am sure this is a compounding factor in why obese people have health problems. They go to the doctor for treatment and are turned away! Duh, if you go to a doctor for help and don't get it, by the time you do get help, it has gotten to be a serious illness or chronic pain (and chronic pain contributes to depression and weight gain, derp doctors, derp!)

I've been lucky enough to find a PCP that actually helps me when I need help and doesn't lecture.

http://www.prevention.com/health/healthy-living/weight-and-obesity-discrimination-doctors

This one made me laugh even though I have a hard time believing it

http://danceswithfat.wordpress.com/2009/12/15/so-my-doctor-tried-to-kill-me/

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I have a good story. I had just moved to a new city and didn't have a PCP yet, so I went to a Patient First. I get bronchitis every winter like clockwork and I know the signs. So off I toddle to the doctor and the jerkoff told me that they wanted to run a bunch of tests on me because (and get this) my coughing and pain when I breathed could be a sign of a heart attack because I'm overweight. So I refused an EKG because, well, I had bronchitis. So the jerkoff was standing right outside of my curtain talking to the other doctors about me and how I was refusing care and gererally mocking me. So I whipped the curtain open, told him the next time he wanted to mock a patient that maybe he shouldn't be on the other side of a curtain, and asked him if he cheated his way through med school as I had serious doubts about his competency and IQ. As I walked away I pulled out my phone and dialed the Patient First hub number and spoke to a customer service supervisor and filed a formal complaint. I don't know if it did any good, but the look on his face when I glanced back was priceless. Trust me, if I have to I can do the stereotypical "big girl with attitude". Oh, and I went to a different doctor that same day and it turned out I had (surprise!) bronchitis.

I think a lot of doctors look at overweight people as lazy and that all our ailments are because of our weight. Granted, many of them are, but somtimes it pays to dig a little deeper into a problem.

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Ya know, its not even all to do with weight- we have a lot of LAZY doctors in this country. Before i was even overweight - when I got sick, I went to EIGHTEEN doctors trying to figure out what was wrong with me. 9 of them didn't even draw blood, others just did basic blood tests and each one of them handed me a prescription for an anti-depressant - and one even suggested mineral supplements - I wasn't depressed - I had heavy metal poisoning and a defective liver!

YOU, yes YOU are your own best advocate for your medical health. If you don't agree with what the doctor says - tell them - if they refuse to look deeper, get your medical records and find a doctor that will!

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I do agree that doctors should be able to address our weight with us. BUT they should not be doing this instead of looking at other possible causes for our issues. To blame our issues on our weight before asking questions is ridiculous.

And, in my case, I have a PCP who I see on a regular basis and who is well aware of my weight. We talk about it all the time. Why a "new-to-me" gynecologist should wait for me to get my pants off to go off on a tangent about my weight is beyond me. We have no relationship of trust or caring. It comes across as completely judgmental, like good grief, medical care requires shaming me for stuff I am already trying to handle with my PCP.

And the key point here is that apparently some of these doctors don't ask questions or listen to fat people.

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I think alot of Dr.s want to be right or the easy answer. I went to a urgent care because my GP's office was closed. I went because I thought I had phnomia. She took a xray, saw the sleeve and said I had to go to the ER, because she didn't know what the sleeve was. I asked her if my lungs were clear and she said she doesn't know what to tell me because of the sleeve. Her focus went somewhere it didn't need to. I was so mad. I looked her in the eye and asked ,"Do I Have Phnomia?!?". " No, but you need to sign a wavier that you refuse to go to the ER."

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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