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Anyone Else Hate To Eat Out?



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This week I'm on my first business trip since I was sleeved on Nov 7th. It's also my first experience with eating in restaurants. I hate it. Why did I not realize before how absolutely HUGE portions are at most restaurants? And without exception, every waitress/waiter looks shocked at how "little" I've eaten, asking if everything is ok (I always assure them it is) and always ask if I want a box. I've just started getting one and taking it back to the room with me because it seems less awkward. But then I feel terribly guilty about all the food I'm throwing away. Not guilty enough to eat it (I couldn't even if I wanted to). I know it won't be so bad once I'm back home because at least there I can take the leftovers home and eat a few more meals from them or share with family. If I were by myself I'd just go back to my room and eat the leftovers. But eating out is actually part of the trip (working lunches and dinners) so not much I can do. Anyone care to share your clever comments for those inevitable questions from strangers or others that don't know about the surgery and it's not really appropriate to share the truth?

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My family never cook so I eat out every weekend. I get by by just ordering off the kids menu but I still take home left overs just not as much. I have had the waitress ask if I was ok before I just answered by saying that I wasn't able to eat a whole lot. Most places that offer kids chicken tenders are usually fried but if you ask they will grill them for you. Believe it or not I can stick pretty close to my diet even eating out it just about making better choices. I hope I helped! Smiles!!!

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I hear you about the comments from the wait staff... I ordered a cup of chili for lunch the other day and got through maybe 1/2-3/4 of it, and when she came back and took it away it was obvious there was some left and she was like " Did you not like it?" and like you I had to assure her that I just couldn't eat much.. to which I'm sure she was like 'ya right fat guy' under her breath, but oh well.

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I sometimes just order an appitizer. I just pick at it, and eat what I can. Dont worry about what the waitress thinks.... its none of their business why you arent eating all of your food. Just assure them that you are happy with it, and ask for a to go box.

I love going out to eat now because I dont feel like everyone is staring at the fat woman eating. I also dont worry about them thinking..... she shouldnt be eating that, or she doesnt match her family. I always felt like someone was watching me eat, or looking at my family (all really skinny) and thinking how are they all skinny and she is so fat, she must not feed them and steals all their food. I know that it was silly thinking, but that is honestly how I felt.

Now I just pay attention to the people that are with me and how good the food tastes....and the conversation...nothing else. It is so freeing. :)

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I eat out all the time. I usually get 3 meals out of going out to dinner.

Sometimes I order from the kids menu or the senior menu, and sometimes I just order Soup or an appetizer.

You can say you aren't feeling well. You are getting over a stomach bug, or you had a late lunch, etc. Sometimes I just say "I am watching my girlish figure"

You are very early out. Later on, you'll be able to eat a little bit more and it won't seem so strange that you have such tiny portions.

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So funny - the SoCal support group was just talking about this at our last meeting. I have had chefs come out to apologize and offer to pay for my meals.

One of SoCal group members had a great tip. Their surgeon hands out cards which you give to a waiter/waitress which explains you have had surgery. He went on to say many restaurants will allow you to order off the childrens menu. Know he also said in Vegas the buffets will let you pay childrens price. I think Sizzler does too along with many other eateries.

Still embarassing to have to "announce" you have had surgery to a complete stranger perhaps better than a battle with wait staff who are mad you are sharing a meal along with only ordering Water plus a take out box. Can you scream cheap? HA HA, I love this sleeve.

Here we are worrying about eating out because we eat too little. Today, post sleeve (15 months out) I still enjoy the atmosphere of dining. Yes, the food tastes good and now I eat very small portions. Remember eating before dining so you did not gorge in front of others? Again, I love this sleevie wonder of mine.

iegal

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"i cracked/chipped my tooth earlier and it hurts to eat anything"

" i feel a cold coming on and I dont feel like eating much"

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I feel so strange going out to eat. I'm so used to finishing an entire entree and still being hungry. Now I eat a few bites and don't even want to see/smell the food afterwards.

It's so much easier to get the food "to go" so I don't have to worry about people "wondering". I'm significantly lighter than I was before surgery, but I still feel like the fat girl that people assume eats tons of food.

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I push my food to the side to make it look like I ate more than I did.

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My family and I eat out maybe once a week. I don't order Entrees anymore. Most restaurants have "add ons" like shrimp or scallops (Outback has those) and I order that. I have also heard that many places have half portions or lunch portions.

The few times I have ordered something larger was when we had a BOGO coupon (like at Ruby Tuesdays) and when I order that I ask the waiter/waitress to bring a box and i'll say something like "i had a late lunch, i'll never be able to finish it" and it normally keeps the comments or looks down.

Good luck!

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A nurse from my clinic told me that the first thing I need to do when I go out to eat to a restaurant is to ask for to go box when they bring you the food smile.png in that way you will remove all the food you won't eat and just leave in the plate whatever you are able to eat =). Don't worry about the waiter's wink.png I seen a lot of people doing that ( asking for a to go box first before they start eating ) I am sure you will get use it biggrin.gif

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The issue for you right now is that you are on a business trip and can't really save the food. When you are home and go to eat out its not going to be that bad. You can order an appetizer or a favorite entree and then take 2/3s of it home for some more meals! It actually will make eating out cheaper.

Also - I noticed you live in Harrison, Arkansas. Small world.....I lived there when I was 4-6 years old. My mom worked with the govt on something with the Buffalo River at that time. I don't remember much except my neighbor grew a lot of weed on his property and there was a raid one day. LOL. Is there still a place called Dogpatch USA? Like a theme park? Fuzzy memories of that too.

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Finally home! I know it's going to get better. Sometimes I just feel the need to come here and vent. I know no one else gets it like everyone here. And there are some great suggestions - thanks!

To top off the week, the waitress yesterday morning was like all the others. But she took it a step further. When she brought our check, she said that she had removed the cost of my meal because she couldn't charge me for something I didn't eat! That was awkward in front of everyone.

Doggz109 - it is a small world! There is still an office for the BNR here (it's part of the national parks system). Dogpatch however, is long gone. I had some fun childhood memories of that place too (that crazy rickety roller coaster and the barrel). It changed owners several times and fell into disrepair before finally closing down. It's kind of sad. It's a massive property just sitting empty. The locals keep hoping someone will buy it and do something with it.

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Breakfast is the hardest one for me to eat when I have to go out to breakfast. I drink a Protein Drink for breakfast and I have for the past 5 years. So when I go out to eat, I have no idea what to order. I don't like eggs, and everything else is carbs.

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It's all about appetizers for me. I went on a biz trip about 2 momths after my sleeve and it was tough. Luckily, the breakfast was a buffet and I had a little yogurt and then shoved a yogurt and packet for hot Cereal in my purse for later. I went out to nice restaurants and I had the experience of not only the waiter, but 2 managers come out and ask me about the food and why I didn't eat it. EMBARRASING!!

I am a big fan of ordering an appetizer plate or single side dish for my dinner. A couple of scallops, a single skewer of chicken, whatever they have. Another fav of mine is to order a cheese / cured meat appetizer - you know with salami, prosciutto, mustard, etc. You will usually be able to get someone to share a little of it and you can just pick at it. I also find I eat a lot of Asian food now. It is usually served family style so you can take a small portion for yourself and enjoy the meal without having a giant plate in front of you. Spanish tapas are also a good call.

It is really uncomfortable at first, but it gets easier. No one knows about my sleeve.

Don't be afraid to order a small plate of food. That will keep you from having the waste anxiety. Also, don't eat the bread they put on the table - you will be full before dinner comes :-)

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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