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BIG secret... good or bad?



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I told close friends and family before surgery (along with some co-workers because I was out three weeks). I got one stupid comment from a thin person who said surgery wasn't necessary to lose weight, but I tried not to get too upset. Some of my family members were freaking out about me getting my stomach cut out. I was sick of my painful lap band and knew the sleeve was for me. So glad I now have my wonderful sleeve! I do get lots of questions about how I have lost the weight. I tell most about the surgery. I did get one negative response. A heatlh conscious friend was excited about my weightloss until someone told her how I did it. She says "I cheated!" Yea right! Honestly though, 99% of people are supportive of my sleeve.

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Anyone who I am good friends with or see often has been told about my surgery, my family knows too. I did have a few people who initially were very much against me having the surgery and they are now very supportive, except the person I thought was my "best friend", she completely abandoned me within weeks of the surgery. If people ask I tell them, especially those that struggle with their weight too and if I am going out to eat with someone who doesn't know I tell them too. I choose to tell those people because it honestly looks like I have an eating disorder to those who are not aware now. Between how quickly the weight came off and how little I eat I have had quite a few assume I have fallen into an eating disorder and I would much rather them know the truth than think that of me. In the end it is a very personal decision and you have to decide what you are comfortable with.

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Guest Rosalind

The best thing about my transition is the people who see me the most know that I have become really serious about my diet. My husband said in the beginning that if people saw I had lost weight, they won't think anything is unusual. Since I am almost 40lbs down now, it won't look so drastic. My uniforms and pants were already very big on me and all the smaller clothes in my closet fit now. I am out of work for 2 months because of another surgery and plan to get wls while I am out. When I go back, they will just think I have dieted and worked out a lot.

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I have told very few people as well. Not sure what to say to my supervisor other then i will be having a surgical procedure and expect to be out x number ow weeks. Any ideas? I would love to hear them. I work in a new office and am not sure what to tell people when I return to work, you know how nosey people can be - HELP please I would love to hear from all of you on this topic.

My suregery date is 8/24/11

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Guest Rosalind

I have told very few people as well. Not sure what to say to my supervisor other then i will be having a surgical procedure and expect to be out x number ow weeks. Any ideas? I would love to hear them. I work in a new office and am not sure what to tell people when I return to work, you know how nosey people can be - HELP please I would love to hear from all of you on this topic.

My suregery date is 8/24/11

The great thing about the new privacy laws is that you don't have to say anything other than you are having a medical procedure. If it is the diet you are worried about, don't eat around people. Also, you will recoup fast. Don't reveal. People will sell your loss short!

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Everyone is different. Some tell and some don't. Do what feels best for you. Before surgery I told only two people. After surgery, I told my immediate family. Personally, I don't feel the need to tell anyone else but that doesn't mean I wont at another date. Take it one day at a time and remember do what feel best for you. Good Luck.

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The great thing about the new privacy laws is that you don't have to say anything other than you are having a medical procedure. If it is the diet you are worried about, don't eat around people. Also, you will recoup fast. Don't reveal. People will sell your loss short!

At my work they wanted a letter from the Dr. saying how long I should be out of work..... it was on Bariatric Surgery letter head....Now I didn't care if they knew, but someone else might....

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At my work they wanted a letter from the Dr. saying how long I should be out of work..... it was on Bariatric Surgery letter head....Now I didn't care if they knew, but someone else might....

Same thing happened to me -- the official 'stamp' that the doctor signs on says something like nutrition and metabolic medicine, translates like bariatric clinic essentially. Great, thanks... <_<

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At my work they wanted a letter from the Dr. saying how long I should be out of work..... it was on Bariatric Surgery letter head....Now I didn't care if they knew, but someone else might....

Your HR departement cannot divulge anything about your medical history to anyone, that would be a HIPAA violation and there would be serious consequences so I think you're fine..

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Guest Rosalind

At my work, we use standard FMLA forms provided by the Department of Labor. These forms are submitted to HR. Our manager/supervisor has no idea what your health issue is unless you tell them..........AND THEY CANNOT ASK YOU EITHER!!! I am glad because I have not intentions of telling any of them.

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I'm a sleever from Indy also! My husband, children, and immediate family know. I couple a friends, but no one from work or church. I figure it is my business and not there's. I ask a coworker prior to the procedure about what she thought of surgery to help someone lose weight, boy did I get an ear full, not positive. I decided then to keep it my business. I don't want to be judged!

I am a very private person and I have decided to share this journey with only my husband (and those of you reading this!). I am very close to my family and I have wonderful friends but I just don't want to let anyone in on my decision to have this procedure. I feel like a failure for all the times I have started a diet and had high hopes only to lose 10lbs and gain back 20. It has happened more times that I can count. Now here I am getting ready for this (8/18 is the big day) and I am just excited and nervous and sometimes in tears thinking "what am I doing?!"! I know this is the right decision for me. I still plan to let no one know about this procedure after it is done. Just me and my hubby :-) And he is so wonderful and supportive. How many of you out there have kept your surgery a secret? After your procedure did you end up telling people? Thank goodness for this site... I am going to need all of you to lean on! I go in a week from tomorrow. My new chapter can't begin soon enough!

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I am a very private person and I have decided to share this journey with only my husband (and those of you reading this!). I am very close to my family and I have wonderful friends but I just don't want to let anyone in on my decision to have this procedure. I feel like a failure for all the times I have started a diet and had high hopes only to lose 10lbs and gain back 20. It has happened more times that I can count. Now here I am getting ready for this (8/18 is the big day) and I am just excited and nervous and sometimes in tears thinking "what am I doing?!"! I know this is the right decision for me. I still plan to let no one know about this procedure after it is done. Just me and my hubby :-) And he is so wonderful and supportive. How many of you out there have kept your surgery a secret? After your procedure did you end up telling people? Thank goodness for this site... I am going to need all of you to lean on! I go in a week from tomorrow. My new chapter can't begin soon enough!

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Hi!! I had to check for a second and make sure I didn't write this post!!!! You sound just like me!! I had surgery on Aug 10th and it's my 1st day of feeling better.

I think any decision regarding your Heath IS very personal and it's your prerogative as to wether you want to share it or not. I have someone I know who said the same thing as us and now she could be the poster child for gastric bypass. So yes... For now I AM keeping it a secret!!!

Best of luck to you on your upcoming surgery. Keep me posted!!!

Hugs!!!

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Hi!! I had to check for a second and make sure I didn't write this post!!!! You sound just like me!! I had surgery on Aug 10th and it's my 1st day of feeling better.

I think any decision regarding your Heath IS very personal and it's your prerogative as to wether you want to share it or not. I have someone I know who said the same thing as us and now she could be the poster child for gastric bypass. So yes... For now I AM keeping it a secret!!!

Best of luck to you on your upcoming surgery. Keep me posted!!!

Hugs!!!

Wow! You just had your surgery... how are you feeling?

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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