Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Thirtysomething women, no kids?



Recommended Posts

TexasRose,

I feel much the same way that you do. I'm 37, single, no kids, and not dating anyone at the moment. I've always struggled with my weight and now that I'm losing, I think "What happens if I meet someone and decide to have a child?" I have a feeling that plastic surgery is somewhere in my future, so I don't know if that will change the way I feel about things.

I teach, so I'm around kids all the time and I've three nephews and a neice, so my mom has grandkids and doesn't pressure me.

At the moment, I'm happy with life and my three cats and working on my master's.

Audra

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Liz - never think you have to settle for one or the other. I'm happily married, starting my PhD next year, and well-established in a professional career. I will plug along until pregnancy comes (at least another year away), then work as much school in as I can. Work will always be there. I love what I do, and make more than DH, so if either of us stays home it'll be him. He loves what he does too, but could make more money doing it as a freelance contractor anyway. And I can work from home. :confused:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm going to be 29 in a month (I relate with older people better, probably because I feel like I'm in my 40's), and have a serious fear of commitment. After a year, I just freak out. I can't do it anymore. I've met someone the past 6 months that is almost the male version of me, and to deal with someone who has the exact same hangups as me is not good. I'm not crazy but I am eccentric, and a hard worker, and a hard player. I do want to have kids someday, and realize the band is something that you can have kids successfully someday. I worry (especially lately, as all of my friends are getting married in the next 18 months or so) that I've missed the boat. I want to go back for my masters degree, and secretly I hope I'll meet someone in the school atmosphere. I have a really hard time not finding creeps, and I'm not a bar chick, those never seem productive. Sigh!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm 36 and I have no kids (THANK GOD!!!). I feel that children really ruin relationships and lives. I thank my lucky stars every day that I have total freedom to live life on MY terms and do what I want to do every moment without being enslaved to a child. I've been married for nine years and I love every single solitary second of my gloriously child-free existance!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wheetsin,

Most of the guys I meet are already married though! I can't find one that's not just a total loser that's not. :confused:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Most of the guys I meet are already married though!

Well... umm... are they happily married? :confused:

You know, if I weren't already married, I have NO IDEA where I'd go to meet guys. No clue. DH and I kind of just ran into each other... and good thing, b/c I'm really bad at meeting people. I definitely can empathize.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am 32 with no children. I was in a LTR and had 2 miscarriages cuz I have polycystic ovarian syndrome. Hard time ovulation and making the egg "stick" .. Now I am single and would love children someday. So banding will help me with that I am sure so I am blessed to have had the surgery.. In fact, just had it 2 days ago!

DonnaMarie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm 37 and single with no children.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I met my husband on yahoo personals. We got married 5 months later. Met in Mid July and got married Dec. 18, 2004. hahaha. YES we are crazy but it's been 2 years since we met and we haven't killed each other yet. I do agree though. It's very hard to meet people!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm 36 and I have no kids (THANK GOD!!!). I feel that children really ruin relationships and lives. I thank my lucky stars every day that I have total freedom to live life on MY terms and do what I want to do every moment without being enslaved to a child. I've been married for nine years and I love every single solitary second of my gloriously child-free existance!!!

In my opinion, parenting is just like everything in life: some people are into it and some people aren’t. I’m 31, child-free and plan to stay that way. I’ve known since the age of seven that children are not part of my life plan.

For those of us who don’t want children, it can seem like children ruin relationships and lives, and it likely would – for us. But I think for people who DO have the desire or urge to be fruitful and multiply, children bring a special dimension to their lives that people like me will never relate to or understand. I’m an independent career girl. I do what I want, when I want. My sister is a stay at home mother of three. I would never want to live her life and she would never want to live mine.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm 33, single, no kids, and thought I was the only one! I'm not sure if I want to have kids or not, but I definitely want to get married (particularly if I can convince him to live next door -- just joking). I figure it'll be easier to untangle all that with some of the weight gone.

Anyway, good to meet you all and know there are others like me.

Take care,

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I just turned 38 a few days ago and am childless by choice. Have been with my husband for 7-8 years (I forget) and married since last Fall. He's getting snipped next week :-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×