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I'm turning off the cloaking device now....



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Hi all!

I've been stalking these forums for a while now but since my surgery date is fast approaching I thought I'd make my grand appearance! LOL!

I'm Beth, I'm a 40 year old SAHM of two - a dd10 and ds7, married for almost 16 years to my college sweetheart and have struggled with my weight since the onset of puberty. Like many others, my condition is a result of a combination of poor eating habits, lack of exercise and genetics - pretty much every family member on each side is heavy and heart disease is commonplace on my Dad's side of the family. My oldest brother was diabetic, 300+lbs and dropped dead of a massive heart attack at the age of 44 in 1998. My Dad died 7 years ago at age 73 during open heart surgery he underwent to replace a valve and do a quintuple bypass - he had suffered from congestive heart failure & diabetes for years and was overweight ever since he retired from the military. My 2 remaining brothers are each 300+ lbs each and I have three 1st cousins on my Dad's side who tip the scales around 400+ lbs. Most everyone else is just regular obese. :)

I started looking into WLS back in 2006 - I hovered between 180 and 200lbs most of my adult life but after my Dad died I was very depressed and grew to 260lbs in no time. Our insurance specifically excluded WLS so I started researching Mexico and the Lapband since RnY seemed too drastic for me. I procrastinated and continued the cycle of gaining and losing until I saw a picture of myself from a vacation we took the first week of October in 2009. I was standing next to a woman who (at the time) I thought was HUGE and vowed to myself to never get as big as. I was shocked to see in the photo that IRL, I was just as big as she was! Denial much? By mid-October I got myself to a local bariatric doc who employs a nutritionist and started on one last, dedicated journey to get the weight off for good the old fashioned way - by eating right and exercising.

Between October 2009 and June 2010 I lost 60 lbs, dropped my 4 can/day soda habit completely was going to the Y 6 days a week, doing high-impact Zumba 3x/week and running 5k races. I even learned to love broccoli! In early June 2010, my elderly mother ruptured a disk in her back and needed pretty much daily assistance. One brother is mentally disabled and lives with her and needed my help as well. The kids were out of school for summer and between their needs and the needs of my mom & brother, I put my needs on the backburner AGAIN. The stress eating kicked in and by August 2010 I had gained 20lbs back. Mom had back surgery 2 days before Thanksgiving and was sent to a rehab facility for 5 weeks. All this time I had to manage 2 households and take care of her needs. Oh, did I mention that during this time I also started a home bakery business and am secretary of my childrens' PTO? She was released by January 2011 & I was finally able to try and focus on myself. For whatever reason, I just could not find the motivation to get myself back to the gym and eating right. Right now, I've gained back 40 of the 60lbs I lost and feel like crap. I'm back at the Y and doing weights and Zumba, but the weight will not budge this time.

In 2011 my husband's insurance changed their policy and started covering WLS! Woot! However, it is BCBS TN (self-insured, Bridgestone) and they only pay for 50% of charges and the costs do not apply to the max out of pocket. If the contracted rate for surgery was $24k, I was going to be on the hook for $12k out of pocket and would still have to meet my deductible of $750! Boo! I went to a local seminar at the COE anyway, I was leaning toward the sleeve and started the paperwork trail. Got my 5 year weight history from my doc, already had the 6 month weight loss thing done with the nutritionist and just needed to submit all the paperwork to insurance. When I started questioning the bariatric surgeon's experience with the sleeve I became concerned. He hasn't done that many and really pushed for RnY. His nurse coordinator had had RnY the previous year but admitted she would have have preferred the sleeve, but her insurance didn't cover it. I decided right then and there that VSG was the right path for me - I have joint problems that aren't likely to be resolved when I get the weight off and I need to be able to take NSAID's now and in the future. Unfortunately, BCBS TN considers VSG 'investigational' and although I could appeal, it would probably be toward the end of summer before anything were decided and my OOP cost would still likely be around $10k. As the self-pay price for VSG is around $20k here, I started researching my options in Mexico once again.

At first, I settled on Dr. Joya and my friend who is a nurse practitioner was going to accompany me so she would be able to advocate for me while enjoying a nice resort location. As I researched further, I kept seeing Dr. Aceves' name. I'm impressed with his stats and his qualifications. Plus, tho my husband had reservations about my going to a 'border town,' I liked the idea of being so close to the States in case of an emergency. And the cost difference is going into new kitchen cabinets for me, tho $$$ wasn't really a deciding factor. :)

My date is almost here! I fly out to San Diego this Thursday and have surgery Friday, April 15th! I couldn't be more excited! I'm a titch nervous about the procedure but totally comfortable going alone (my NP friend couldn't rearrange her schedule so quickly) and looking forward to getting this behind me and moving forward with the rest of my life at a normal, healthy weight. I took my Girl Scout troop camping this weekend and hated that I had such a hard time keeping up with a bunch of 9 and 10 year old girls on the hikes. I miss running and want to get back outside on the local greenway without feeling like my knees are going to shatter with every step. I want to be able to push my kids on the tire swing without getting winded and needing to sit down for a breather. I want to live a long and healthy life, free of the curse of heart disease that has ravaged my family for several generations.

Anyhoo, I'm happy to be here and glad I finally uncloaked. Looking forward to being an active participant here - you all give such wonderful, supportive advice and have a great community!

Beth

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Welcome and congratulations on getting a date!

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Welcome! I can't wait to hear how everything goes!

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Welcome to VST ... the other members here are GREAT! Read and ask questions because we are all here to help.

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Congrats on your date - you are going to be very happy with Dr Aceves and his team. Mexicali is very low key - not like a typical border town.

Good luck!

Lara

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Welcome Welcome Welcome. I think we all ghost the site before we actually join, at least i did. I wish you much success on this new journey in your life.

Congrats on your date!

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Welcome to VST ... the other members here are GREAT! Read and ask questions because we are all here to help.

And you are great as well!!!

@MaryMoon,

WELCOME to VST!!! Your story is very common around here. I do believe it's hard to guage exactly how big we really are - and as for me it was the pictures of me here and there (very few indeed) that gave me the truth. Therefore I hated taking pictures, it made me face reality.

I'm looking forward to hearing your progress... good luck!!!

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Thanks for the warm welcome! I'm sooo excited about the upcoming surgery! Been busy trying to tie up some loose ends here, getting the house clean, and planning school lunches and clothing choices for the kids while I'm gone. I love my husband but he'd let them wear ratty play clothes to school if they asked. This way I'll know they'll look decent in my absence. I'm chaperoning a field trip for my DS's grade tomorrow so I have to get it all done TODAY! Ack!

My daughter is very upset that I'm leaving and is afraid I'll die in surgery like her PaPaw. :( I explained that I'm much healthier than he was and my surgery isn't as complicated but she has a sensitive heart and is a worrier.

I know I'm getting ready to have a major surgery in a foreign country by a doc I've never met and all, but my biggest fear at this point is whether I'm going to fit into the ridiculously small seats on Southwest. I'm 25lbs heavier than the last time I flew & I'm so afraid I'll get up there and be asked to buy a second seat. My DH thinks I'm being silly but I'm really, really worried about this.

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Welcome MaryMoon, I'm new to and have gotten so much information and support from all the great folks on this site. You sound like you are an awsome mom and daughter. Going to Mexico is a big step and I'm going alone as well. Best of luck to you. To a healthier you and skinny jeans : )

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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      1. Selina333

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      2. Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

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