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how do you see fat people now?



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Just a question for those of you who have lost either a lot of weight or at goal, how do you see morbidly obese people now? How do you react in restaurants when you see very obese people eating? How do you look at obese people walking or whatever? Have you noticed it's different, or the same?

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I feel differently towards them but not how you may think. I watch them gorge themselves and feel sad for them. It's less than 3 months since I ate that way. I was a prisoner to it and it's not that I wish WLS for everyone. But it breaks my heart to see people in any addictive, damaging behavior.

I see them and am glad it's not me anymore but wish it wasn't them either.

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I have officially lost 88 lbs and still have 117 to go, so I'm no lightweight yet. But when I see overweight people now, I have such an overwhelming compassion for them. I'm 58 years old, I've struggled and 'white knuckled' this weight thing since before I was in 1st grade. My Grandmother had me on 'diets' before I was 6 years old.

I've grown up with the attitude that I was never good enough and always an outcast from the rest of society. These feelings are now interjected onto those that I see, who are 'pretending' to be happy but I know first hand their sorrow.

I want to race right over to them and tell them about this wonderful new surgery called VSG that will enable them to never 'white knuckle' again. I want to tell them that it is possible to be FREE of desiring food over life. But...I also know what it is like to be faced with 'do-gooders' who feel they have all the answers. So, therefore, I just sit, feeling deep sadness for them, and mind my own business.:tongue_smilie:

Edited by Lookinupin2010

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I notice overweight people more now for some reason. It's like when I was pregnant in reverse, I suddenly saw loads of other pregnant women everywhere I went. I remeber recently I was waiting at the railway station and for 5 minutes everone who came through the entrance was very overweight. Apparently 30% of adults in the UK are overweight now, I don't know why. When I was young I was unusual being fat, now I feel unusual being thin! I do want to tell complete strangers about this op sometimes but I have always chickened out. It makes me sad that they are in that state, as I know only too well how it makes you feel. I never want to become a holier than thou sanctimonious ex-fatty though, I felt the same when I quit smoking. I hate cigarettes, not the smokers.

Jane x

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I don't notice overweight people anymore or less than before. I still can't stand to see fat women squeeze themselves in clothes that are 3 times too small, but I felt the same way at 270lbs. I don't watch people eat, skinny or fat, it kind of makes me sick.

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I have only lost about 22 lbs and have about 30 to go, and I feel like running up to fat people to tell them about this wonderful op and that they CAN loose weight, but of course I just mind my own business as people above were saying. Today was my 1st real challenge, we went to the seaside and hubby and the children had fish and chips, a MUST when we go to the beach, and I just sat there having a minestrone Soup :thumbup: I am proud of myself though, and I just hope I can keep up with this behaviour until i reach my target weight!

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i with you tiffkin luv. i feel the same way i don't judge. although not every style is for every body type anyway is this something ive been working on for years when negative thoughts come i squash them quick. and to be honest i'm really no bit differnt then them. after all i was 323 pounds just a year ago. it like getting rich how can you forget you too could not afford things. i hate it when people who were once something and are now not and just judge others. very very un lady like.

Edited by ryansgirl

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I know this is an old thread, but new to this site- I felt compelled to respond. As a VBG in 1998, and did initially loose a large amount of weight and I will say I did start to develop a bit of a judgmental attitude towards people heavier than me. In part, I think it was due to my age and lack of maturity (was 28 at the time). Of course then, as the weight started to come back, its amazing how a person reverts their way of thinking.

As Tiffkins said though, I do hate to see people wearing clothes too small for them and they are spilling out of their clothes.

I feel now though with a little more age comes with maturity that if I am fortunate enough to get the VSG that I will not forget the compassion people need for something that is a serious and difficult medical issue. I have a friend (not close) who had the lapband a couple years ago, and then just earlier this year she had surgery to remove excess skin on her tummy and legs. She's a little bit of a diva. I have noticed in the months following her having the cosmetic surgery she will make snide remarks about other overweight people or looks. That makes me me wonder what she says or thinks of me when I'm out of ear shot. My concern for her is with all that I've been reading about the low success rates w/the lapband that she may be in for a tough awakening in the next few years because has refused to do any exercise throughout the process. Time will only tell on her long term success.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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