Considering the sleeve and assisted reproduction

[alreadychosen 0]

Hello all! I have been reading this forum and keeping up to date on challenges and issues and benefits of having the sleeve with pregnancy.

Congrats Ange! Not sure how many else are pregnant / have been pregnant with the sleeve or if many are reading this board, but thought I would give it a shot as I am in desperate need of advise.

I am currently working with an RE on embryo adoption (we are unable to have our own biological children - severe male factor). Despite the most important thing to me in the world at this point, I have been unable to lose weight to increase my chances of the transfer taking. My BMI is around 39. They don't qualify anyone for transfer who is over 40 and I am just on the cusp. This makes me really nervous that if I gain anymore weight before the transfer, they will refuse. We have been down this road so long with infertility, adoption attempts, etc it is really heartbreaking. I am 35 so time is ticking, and I have a desperate need to have a child (hopefully more if we are so blessed).

I had an appointment with a surgeon who said that 6 months post surgery, I should be stable enough with nutrition and weight to carry a baby, even though a lot of the official recommendations say 18 months. I just don't know what to do. I desperately want a baby and can maybe do a transfer in two to three months. But I also fear gaining an additional substantial amount of weight with the baby and potential complications. Or it may not work because of my weight and all the money and emotion spent would be for nothing. Then I fear having the surgery and having something wrong with the baby because I didn't get enough nutrients (I would NEVER forgive myself) or losing the effect of the sleeve before I even reached goal because of the increased amount of food needed with the baby. Or even that the transfer won't work and we have to go into domestic adoption a year later than we would have if we tried now.

I am so back and forth on this right now. I have another RE appointment to look at my uterus on Wed so it may make the decision for me, but I am anticipating everything will be fine. I plan to ask her what her thoughts are from the RE perspective. But I also need some outside objective opinions on this. Should I wait until after we try for a transfer (and hopefully a pregnancy) to have a sleeve or do it before and postpone the transfer? Any thoughts and honest suggestions will be significantly appreciated!

[Tiffykins 672]

I was released for us to try to conceive 7-8 months post-op. My labs had been fabulous, maintenance for me was a challenge, but due to my husband's career, my age and other factors, we have been actively trying since the end of February. We have not been successful to date. But, we have not lost hope as we just started this entire process. My PCP and surgeon are both in agreement that you need to have your weight stabilized before trying. My hormones were all over the place while losing, my cycle was not extremely regular, I'd go 32 days, then the next month 27 days. It is evening out over time, but I can tell that my body is still adjusting to my drastic loss in such a short amount of time.

My surgeon says it on a case by case basis. There's a lot of women that end up pregnant before the standard "18 months", and my surgeon explained that it's not "ideal", it's a manageable situation. I've read several stories on obesityhelp of VSG patients delivering healthy, thriving babies. I had this surgery so we could have improve our chances of getting pregnant and having a less complicated pregnancy/birth. I would want to prepare my body as best I could so that I could give my baby the best environment for growth and development. I've not been in your shoes, but I do know that my husband and I waited over 1.5 years to get pregnant because of my weight. Now, I am more confident in my health, and would not get pregnant at my previous weight. I felt it was dangerous for me and baby. You really have to do what is best for you and your future baby. I don't have any amazing advice for you, but I'll keep you in my thoughts.

[SouthernSleever 228]

I'm 5'6" and 270 when my husband and I decided to have kids I lost 40lbs before our first. The pregnancy went fine and I watched what I ate at that time. The biggest issue was not my weight it was health care worker's perception of my weight. Because I was overweight they didn't ajust their measurements for my belly, they pushed for ultrasounds to see how big the baby was, they estimated him to be at least 11lbs at the least at 40 weeks(look at you and your husband, you are both big people). They assumed I wasn't active and ate poorly. With that pregnancy I had a lot of stress and ended in a c-section. My at least 11lb baby was born before he was ready to come on his own at 8lbs 12oz two weeks after that U/S. They said the reason he wouldn't deliever is my pelvis was too narrow (from the fat apparently). With my second baby I had kept on about 10lbs more so I was at 240. With this child though, I had a midwife and had my baby at home. I ate well and stayed active. That pregnancy and birth was a breeze. He came out at 42weeks on his own at 9lbs 12oz. I nursed both of them and the little one is still nursing at 2. Those are my experiences. If you were to have a child and are in good shape (acitve, no other issues) I would say to do it now so that you can eat enough for you to keep your teeth and health because the baby WILL get what he needs you will be the one to suffer. Also so you can nurse your babies. Nursing alone consumes around 500 calories it's self.

The only reason you might go ahead with the surgery is that having the surgery would be terribly hard with a young baby and life in general is a lot harder once you have kids so you wouldn't have the ability to recoup after the surgery like you would w/o kids. Depending on when you had the baby you may have to wean him or her early and if something was to happen to you, you would leave behind a baby or not beable to be with your baby for an extended amount of time. I wouldn't worry about the baby getting enough nutrition though, it will be you and your body who suffers not him as long as you don't use any calories for junk food.

[alreadychosen 0]

Thank you both for the feedback. Some really good points I will toss in the mix. Hopefully I will have a clearer idea after my appointment tomorrow. I read on one of the Australian boards that several of the post-sleeve pregnant women were trying to drink a lot of their nutrients - blending vegetables and fruits to increase the amount of those they could eat. Seems to make sense - what are your thoughts post-sleeve? Also, how hard would it be to leave a baby over night for the surgery (especially our first after YEARS of trying)? Not sure I could do it. I just hate postponing something we have been working on for more than 8 years. Wish me luck and clear answers tomorrow!

[SouthernSleever 228]

This is one of the things I'm struggling with now. I have a 5 and 2 1/2 year old. I can leave the 5 year old fine and he understands that I'll be back but it really is hard on my 2 1/2 year old even when I am gone for several hours. The thoughts running through my head are, "Does he think I'm dead? Does he start greiving?" Hubby says after more than 8 hours he gets really quiet and withdrawls :thumbup: I think I am taking him and my Mom with me to have the surgery done.

[songbird_kay 5]

I just hate postponing something we have been working on for more than 8 years.

I totally understand this... It was honestly the hardest decision to make in the whole WLS deal. Look at it this way: you have already waited 8 years to get the baby you so desire, so what is a short 10-12 months more? You will be upping your chances of success with embryo transfer A LOT and majorly reducing the risks of pregnancy induced hypertension, gestational diabetes, and Pre-E. Overall you will be so much more healthy in pregnancy and in parenthood as well. I had to make this same decision myself and I KNOW I am headed in the right direction FOR ME. Good luck making this very hard decision

Robin

TTC 3.5 years. Severe PCOS. Four miscarriages. Dx with complex atypical endometrial hyperplasia in '08, now in remission. severe male factor IF.

[alreadychosen 0]

Well, I had my appointment and all went fine. But my RE didn't have a strong opinion one way or the other which, to be honest, I was really hoping for. It just seems that these are the two biggest issues in my life and it is ironic they are both coming to a head at the same time. Cigna just started covering the sleeve which is why that has all of a sudden come of interest to me, although after reviewing all the success on this board, I would now even pay out of pocket for it! Maybe I shouldn't have come here, LOL - or at least started reading it a year ago so this would be an issue! But the potential complications also give me caution about doing this post-baby. On the opposite end, my husband would like us to go ahead with at least one transfer attempt since we are so far into the process. This is what we may end up doing but I really hate that I feel equally pulled and hope I don't regret the decision one way or the other.

[songbird_kay 5]

well, it is very important to consider your DHs opinion. Keep communication open about this topic and as time passes I think you will come to the right decision for you and your DH.

GL!

[deedee 5]

I wish you luck on making this decision. I cannot even imagine the emotions you are dealing with after 8 years of this, but in the end successfully getting pregnant was the driving force behind me having wls.

My husband and I had been trying for a couple of years and I had one surgery to remove fibroids. The month before we were supposed to go back to the RE after recovering from the fibroid surgery, my husband had a heart to heart with me about his concerns regarding my weight and getting pregnant.

I had the surgery in August and made my goal weight about 6 months post-op. I continued to lose for another month after making goal, but have now been stable for a couple of months. I, and my surgeon, would have been okay with me getting pregnant once reaching goal and being stable. Good luck with this decision!

[dange25 57]

I think the biggest hurdle for me at this stage is Hydration. I do wonder how im going to be able to nurse!!! as far as my pregnancy is concerned, its been a walk in the park against my first where i was layed up sick in pain with gestational diabeties and then ending up needing a c section!!!

weight loss surgury has helped my over all wellbeing during this pregnancy. my watch outs were as i mentioned before hydration. this is a constant battle to keep fluids to up to myself and bub. the second issue was low blood sugar levels. i was actually told to keep eating, changing the priority from Protein to carb over the day with more frequent imput. Other than that everything has been really smooth sailing. yes i did feel sick and a bit chucky with some foods but hey lol we all know THAT HAPPENS <grins> tired every now and then....yep..thats one of the joys too right!!! i guess what im saying is that so far, so good. if i had to choose which pregnancy i would prefer to have again from my first or second, i would take the second without hesitation. its been a breeze. i have had a few more docs visits, Vitamins and blood tests this time around but all with good outcomes thus far. its been a walk in the park with less weight on board, not to mention my very happy weight loss that the docs are also 'watching'.

my baby is healthy so far and is looking at around a 7 1/2 lb bouncing birth weight <smiles>

It can be done without too many hickups after surgury, hope this gives you a little insite as a "case study"

thankyou for your congrats and if there is anything you want to ask feel free to drop me a mes.

[crzymamaof3 0]

I have been in your fertilty shoes, and from going through the highs and lows of it, I would strongly suggest doing you embro transfer first, the hormones and pregnancy do take a toll on you and after having the sleeve done myself (15mnth after baby) I cant imagine being pregnant on top of it. If you need to slim down before transfer, try the diet you will be on after surgery, mostly protien and veggies and fruit. Walk or try some yoga (which totally helps during pregnancy.) I wish you the very best of luck.