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I wish my husband would quit telling everyone



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Before my surgery (4/7/2010) I had told my husband that I didn't want anyone to know, except a handful, and I gave him the very small list of whom he could share this with. He agreed.

He has been incredibly supportive of this with me, more than I anticipated. He spent both nights in the hospital with me, him sleeping in a chair that was supposed to make out into a bed, but quite frankly fell short. He has been in search for Protein shakes that don't turn me off, without me asking. He drives me everyplace that I want or need to go....my blood pressure has been getting too low and sometimes I feel a little loopy, and I'm afraid to drive at 13 days postop with that happening to me. And he is constantly telling me he loves me.

The PROBLEM: He is so proud of me, he keeps telling people that I don't want to know !!!!! I confronted him on it yesterday, and named off several people that I DEFINATELY did not want to know and he got a funny look on his face. He didn't admit it in words....but the look said, "Oh oh....I better tell them pretty quick not to say anthing !!"

Anyone else have this with a loving spouse or parent that just couln't keep their mouth shut?:crying:

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No, my husband has kept very mum and was starting to feel guilty telling people "she's just REALLY watching her portions". Poor guy, I felt sorry for him & ended up telling the people who had been asking.

I know it's your body and your privacy, but I feel for your husband. He is so proud of you and wants to shout it from the rooftops. Maybe you could push that energy into something the two of you can enjoy! :crying:

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I agree, I think he is just proud of you. I know it is hard but think about how it would be without his support. Just gently remind him that you DON'T want every one to know what is going on. and maybe give him some SAFE things to say when people ask about you.

Good luck

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Ahh...thanks guys. Your right. He is so sweet, and loves me so much, even though I don't make it easy for him sometimes.

I'm feeling a little guilty right now....think I'll give him a big smooch when he gets home.

Thanks for reminding me how fortunate I am. :crying:

Sleeved 4/7/2010

Dr. Chiasson

Total lost so far: 31 lbs

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Good for you! (Though, don't feel too guilty ... we understand your point of view too.) But, he sounds wonderful. Some smooching is probably just the thing to make it all right again!

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Awww...that's kind of sweet. I can see where it's frustrating, but still, it's great that he's so proud of you. I guess I'm lucky that my own husband is a very private person and doesn't really say anything about anything EVER unless you drag it out of him...huh.

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Awww it is sweet that he is so proud of you, but I can see how that would be frustrated.

Many guys that work with my husband asked him recently if he got a new wife. A lot of them haven't seen me since before my sleeve revision, and they just can't believe I'm the same woman. It's kind of funny, he just tells them, I'm the same wife, just a smaller version.

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Literally laughing out loud here over the "new wife" thing. None of my husbands co-workers have actually seen me in two years--I did get dressed up for the first New Years party two years ago when I still qualified for "hot wife" status but he worked late and was too tired to go....when we were dating, he got major props from his coworkers because I was a catch. I know it's twisted, but in a mostly male profession, the hot wife makes the guys think he must have a little something special about him, you know? I could be all feminist and huffy about it but that wouldn't change the way it works...

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Literally laughing out loud here over the "new wife" thing. None of my husbands co-workers have actually seen me in two years--I did get dressed up for the first New Years party two years ago when I still qualified for "hot wife" status but he worked late and was too tired to go....when we were dating, he got major props from his coworkers because I was a catch. I know it's twisted, but in a mostly male profession, the hot wife makes the guys think he must have a little something special about him, you know? I could be all feminist and huffy about it but that wouldn't change the way it works...

I completely understand that male dominated field thing and hot wife.

John's a cop in the Air Force. Combine cop and military, it's a set up for testosterone laden cocky men. Some of them know about my surgery, mainly the guys that were deployed with him. It's the guys that do patrol that haven't seen me since the '08 Christmas party that were questioning John.

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I think in a way that our husbands do need support from their social network as we go through this. My husband told more people than I figured he would b/c he was upset and worried. Try to understand...

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