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depressed and can't sleep



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:sad0: OMG the depression is there and I am trying to ignore it :( I am 4 weeks out and feel very frustrated :cursing: I hate it when I see people just eat normally.....taking regular bites....gulping down drinks.....ugh and to top it all off I got on the scale and I am still at a stall....it's so frustrating.....I told my cousin geezzz I don't know what is worse being frustrated FAT or being frustrated because I can't eat normally!!! Plus I am having such a hard time sleeping lately???? UGH I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO??? I know I should be going to my support group but my support group is at Night and my Husband works at Night and we only have 1 car so that is out of the question......someone please help.....:lol0:

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I dont know what to tell you, but hang in there!

Read the posts of other sleevers that have gone thru similar depressions and stalls and look at their posts a month later, where they are happy to have lost more weight again!

Is there no one you can carpool with to your support group?

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I just wanted to say that I understand. I went through similar feelings and even though it doesn't help you now, they eventually passed. Vent here, this is a great place to get support. I wish you luck on your journey, it WILL get better!

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:sad0: OMG the depression is there and I am trying to ignore it :( I am 4 weeks out and feel very frustrated :cursing: I hate it when I see people just eat normally.....taking regular bites....gulping down drinks.....ugh and to top it all off I got on the scale and I am still at a stall....it's so frustrating.....I told my cousin geezzz I don't know what is worse being frustrated FAT or being frustrated because I can't eat normally!!! Plus I am having such a hard time sleeping lately???? UGH I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO??? I know I should be going to my support group but my support group is at Night and my Husband works at Night and we only have 1 car so that is out of the question......someone please help.....:angry:

Hey Okalani, How much weight have you lost? I am 3 1/2 weeks out. I have been feeling bad lately too. The first 15 days went great and I lost 20lbs, but since then the scale hasn't moved at all... :crying:

I don't understand it since we are not eating hardly anything. I am at the point with my drinking that it doesn't bother me to take bigger gulps. So, I am just starting to get more Water down.

I went out with a group this week to eat and everyone was eating fried chicken and french fries and I was there with my side of yucky mashed Beans... :confused1:

You don't feel as bad about it if you are really losing weight, but if you're not it sucks!

Sorry that you haven't been sleeping well. I don't know about that one.

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Hi Okalani,

I am sorry you are feeling bad. I can definitely understand how hard it must be to watch others eat when you can not. Particularly if you were used to eating partly as a comfort activity. What other comfort activities do you enjoy? Yoga? Hot showers followed by a warm oil self massage? Drives, picture taking? Aromatherapy?

Also, what exactly is happening with your sleeping? trouble falling or staying asleep? How many hours are you getting continuously? Are you napping? Would you mind providing a bit more detail?

Hoping for a quick improvement for you!

Joon

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I can understand the feeling although I am 5 months out, I am no stranger to depression but beware, the depression can hit even without a stall. I know alot of us go through that after weight loss due to loss of harmones and chemical imbalances following the loss of fat cell that generally store alot of these important chemicals. I found myself in a big depression but it hit so gradually that I didnt identify it was depression until some of the major symptoms were beginning to surface. I would go to work as usual but in the evening or weekend I would isolate myself, do some housework, but keep to myself, my car didnt even leave the garage and only a select few phone calls, the following weekend would be worse, the same isolation but I wouldnt do anything leading to the following weekend without even getting dressed or brushing my hair. Suddenly I felt guilty for the behavior and then and only then did it dawn on me that I was headed to that dark cloud point. I went to see my doctor and he upped my antidepressants. The point of this is just to keep alert to some of the gentle behaviors of frustration and anxiety and watch for more serious signs that can follow. Your frustration over stalls is justified I grant you that but... dont let it become worse before getting some professional help. Its a difficult thing to climb out of once it starts. Keep you chin up, the stall will pass.

Edited by Ruthi

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Your hormones are going crazy. Your crutch and comfort (food) is gone. What you are feeling is normal. This was a major life change.

First: I promise it gets better! This out of control, crazy, I am different now feeling will go away.

Second: If you are really feeling down talk to your surgeon or make an appt to talk to a counselor. It can only help.

Hey can you beg a ride from someone in your support group? Offer to pay for gas? Ask a family member to help? Get there however you can.

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10 month veteran here. I think the three week stall, or in your case the four week stall is typical. I bet you are probably where you need to be in your weight loss. Not that I haven't yelled at my scale myslef. I still do. But don't get stuck on thinking things will not get better. They will. Now when I see people eat so much....as I used to...it amazes me. Recently I was at a buffet (but didn't get the buffet)...and thought how can someone eat two plates of food? Of course I used to go for seconds too....this will change for you too. Only eating a bit will be satisfying. I like that...I like that a lot!

It sounds so easy to say give it time, but really you WILL lose weight. I'm down more than 100 lbs. You've done a good thing here, you won't be fat forever, but it will take time. The benefits are so much better than being able to eat all the food we want.

I've said this before and will continue to......this journey is a great one, and one to be enjoyed. True, it's still early for you and I do remember it not being so much fun either. But after six or eight weeks it gets sooooooo much better. Believe me!

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I am so sorry you are feeling down. I am going through much grief and unbearable anxiety since the surgery day one. It's odd because nearly everyone I read about on this board is happy and positive. I have no choice but to seek professional help since the anxiety is incapacitating me. I have been taking anti anxiety medication "xanax" and am at the point where without it I am so anxious I can't eat or sleep and can hardly move...literally. This has been a frightening experience for me and so I understand all of your concerns. Monday I will meet with my psychologist (who specializes in WLS patients), she wants to get me to transition from the xanax to an SSRI, (anti-depressant). Before the surgery I took no drugs at all and now I'm needing xanax and will likely be taking additional meds since I am in such dire straits emotionally. I don't know but I hope things will change for the better and soon for the both of us. I went to a support group and it was very benificial although I was in bad shape. Keep reaching out...as everyone assures us, things will eventually get better.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

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