A cry for a friend...

[endingyoyo 28]

I had lapband in May of 2013. My bestfriend since nursery school had gastric bypass in July of 2013. This was our journey togehter. Thers is such comfort of having a friend that is exploring this journey with you. Someone who tells you like it is, who doesn't play games, who is as real as it gets.

She passsed away on 9/8/13 due to complications from WLS.

I'm lost. I'm heartbroken. She's the only person (other than my husband and immediate family) that knew I had lapband. She was the one person that I confided in about everything. The one person who "got it."

She was my sanity. The one who broke through the bull ****, could talk about the real issues of being fat, without getting caught up in the bs, who knew what it was like to be a fat mom, but wanted the best for our kids (we both have 5 and 3 year old), who could admit what we were missing without feeling sorry for ourselves, who could talk about how different our lives would be when we reached our goal weights, who knew that it sucked that we have "rib fat" or an "apron" of fat, that we couldn't see our kitty kats and that our 'girls' were better off before we spent years breastfeeding. She made me laugh, she was raw, but real, and that's what I loved most.

I miss her. I miss her honesty.

I'm desperatly seeking someone who "get's it," who isn't tyring to play the game, trying to be a perfect mom or pretending to live a life that is completly conformed since surgery. I'm struggling every day and am assuming that others are as well.

Am I crazy to think that there are others out there that understand where I'm coming from or who feel comfortable with iinappropiate humor/raw reality? If so, I'm dying to conncet with you. I miss my friend dearly and am desperaly in need of someone to fill the void of honestly.

When alll is said and done, i'm looking for a friend in this journey. No judgement. Just realality and honesty about how much life sucks with being a fat mom (or dad!!!!)

[dragonflylvr21 161]

First, I am very sorry for your loss! I also have a friend who had gastric the same time I had my lapband! Ironically ... It has strained our relationship because of how limited she is compared to me! I was banded 7-24-13 and only have had two fills! I have 5cc's in my 10 cc band. Yes I have restriction but I am not in the green yet! So.. I can eat pretty much what ever I want just smaller portions! She however is struggling with everything she eats! I feel for her and try to help but she gets so angry at me! I haven't spoken to her in days because she is obsessed with my diet! I refused to talk about food the last time and she hung up on me! So! In a weird way I understand the loss of support!

I struggle now because I have to count calories and make choices that are hard in order to keep the 30 pounds I have lost off! I too crave that honesty that only another "fat" person can give with WLS experience!

Hopefully we both find the support and guidance we need!

[MzEboni912 177]

I had lapband in May of 2013. My bestfriend since nursery school had gastric bypass in July of 2013. This was our journey togehter. Thers is such comfort of having a friend that is exploring this journey with you. Someone who tells you like it is' date=' who doesn't play games, who is as real as it gets.

She passsed away on 9/8/13 due to complications from WLS.

I'm lost. I'm heartbroken. She's the only person (other than my husband and immediate family) that knew I had lapband. She was the one person that I confided in about everything. The one person who "got it."

She was my sanity. The one who broke through the bull ****, could talk about the real issues of being fat, without getting caught up in the bs, who knew what it was like to be a fat mom, but wanted the best for our kids (we both have 5 and 3 year old), who could admit what we were missing without feeling sorry for ourselves, who could talk about how different our lives would be when we reached our goal weights, who knew that it sucked that we have "rib fat" or an "apron" of fat, that we couldn't see our kitty kats and that our 'girls' were better off before we spent years breastfeeding. She made me laugh, she was raw, but real, and that's what I loved most.

I miss her. I miss her honesty.

I'm desperatly seeking someone who "get's it," who isn't tyring to play the game, trying to be a perfect mom or pretending to live a life that is completly conformed since surgery. I'm struggling every day and am assuming that others are as well.

Am I crazy to think that there are others out there that understand where I'm coming from or who feel comfortable with iinappropiate humor/raw reality? If so, I'm dying to conncet with you. I miss my friend dearly and am desperaly in need of someone to fill the void of honestly.

When alll is said and done, i'm looking for a friend in this journey. No judgement. Just realality and honesty about how much life sucks with being a fat mom (or dad!!!!)[/quote']

I am sorry about your friend. I can't feel what your feeling because my best friend is still here with me. She has been my buddy since we were in fourth grade. She is my rock, my BS detector and whatever else I need. If you still need a friend to talk to I am here.