Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Frustrated and scared



Recommended Posts

That's understandable. I think that wl issues will always be with us. I greatly appreciate that the band has slowed things down so that I can address the mental side of wl and I know I have made some very real changes in my diet and eating habits. However, 4 years later I am still certain that they are not cemented into me that I couldn't falter. I know I need this band, my mind and body needs it! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wonder sometimes if I had mine removed, could I maintain? I don't think I could but I think I've learned so much about myself and nutrition during the last 1 1/2 years that I could be more successful(than before band) if I didn't have the band. I know it would be very difficult though.

tmf, my doctor said to me when I was complaining about gaining 35lbs in 10 months that had I not learned all the good lessons from being banded, I would have gained ALL my excess weight back and more, he is convinced. When I started losing again just before my replacement, we talked about the possibility of living without a band, and I said, 'no this is too hard without a band' and it was. Losing 3lbs a month was demoralising, and one 'bad' weekend meant I'd gain. Yeah, no, I don't want to live like that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The band works this way: hard Protein keeps you full for longer. Eat Protein in the majority and the rest in other food groups' date=' don't eat sliders like chips and Cookies and ice cream, and you're working WITH your band to manage your hunger.

Removing your band isn't going to change your old habits or your poor relationship with food. In fact if I were to hazard a guess, it would make it FAR worse because you have nothing there to help with your physical hunger.

I think I understand that you're saying that you want to lose, but fear that you can't work with your band due to the fear that you will damage it because you think you lack self-control. That's a hard one to solve, I expect therapy might be a good start because that's psychological not physiological. But generally speaking removing your band will probably make that far worse for you in the long run.[/quote']

I definitely agree. I think that is my issue as well. I am not being responsible with the band like I used to be. The first year and a half I had it, I was so strict and I feel this past year has been rocky. It's like I've been fighting my old habits. I think I may join a support group that my doctor offers. I think I would definitely benefit from it

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Support is so important, not just with the food issues each of us have had, but with motivation for exercise and lifestyle changes. People generally achieve more weight loss when in a group that if they try to do it solo. Having people to bounce ideas off, learn new things from, vent about your failures to, crow about your successes to, and who will smack you about the head once in a while actually makes the road easier if you're willing to walk it.

That's why after 5 years I'm still hanging around this place: the friends I have made on here keep me honest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Support is so important' date=' not just with the food issues each of us have had, but with motivation for exercise and lifestyle changes. People generally achieve more weight loss when in a group that if they try to do it solo. Having people to bounce ideas off, learn new things from, vent about your failures to, crow about your successes to, and who will smack you about the head once in a while actually makes the road easier if you're willing to walk it.

That's why after 5 years I'm still hanging around this place: the friends I have made on here keep me honest.[/quote']

That's amazing. ;) honestly, even though i just got on here, I feel motivated already. I kind of needed a slap of reality. And it's nice to have people to talk to who understand.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's what I love about LBT, there are people on here who are committed to this lifestyle and if you need someone to help, they're there. But don't expect them to coddle you, they will tell it to you straight, and if you take that support on board, you will come away with LOTS of incredible collective knowledge to help you every step of the way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's amazing. ;) honestly' date=' even though i just got on here, I feel motivated already. I kind of needed a slap of reality. And it's nice to have people to talk to who understand.[/quote']

That is great! I know I enjoy the honesty that this site provides. It is all my thoughts without family or friends not MYOBing.

Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yea definitely! It's nice to hear everyone's experiences. I'm going to hit the hay though. I'll be on tomorrow! Lol I feel like I've been on this all night being nosy with all the forums haha. Night guys and thank u!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

And honestly I'm not really "scared" I'm more concerned with going back to my old habits. The band definitely helped me but I feel that I need to help myself mentally as well. I eat smaller portions now and completely changed my habits but in my head I still feel that I'm not 100% changed. So I still struggle with food and not eating the right things sometimes so I get scared I'm going to cause my own harm to the band. I just wanted to vent bc I know I could find someone on here that understands :)

Nikki - Although some may disagree, I don't believe that any of us who got to the point of WLS, are ever really cured 100% from our eating issues. Sure, we make changes; control what we eat, exercise to varying degrees, and follow the band rules (albeit, not always perfectly). But food addiction is no different than any other addiction, in as we can fall back into old habits & behaviors at any time. That's why one of the 12 step program mantras is that they're always "in recovery"; never "recovered". I couldn't agree more. With food, it's actually more difficult, because you can never completely stop eating, as you can with using drugs & alcohol.

As far as concerns about complications with the band, yes, I think about it, too. Although, now that I've got a few months under my belt, I don't think about it quite as much. But, sure, it's always in the back of my head, especially since I had the band with plication. I'm doing pretty well, so I figure I'll pay close attention, see my doctor regularly, and deal with complications IF they arise.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wonder sometimes if I had mine removed, could I maintain? I don't think I could but I think I've learned so much about myself and nutrition during the last 1 1/2 years that I could be more successful(than before band) if I didn't have the band. I know it would be very difficult though.

I asked my doctor about this...... I asked if some choose to have the band removed after reaching goal. He said that some do, but most of them start gaining. Scares the s-hit out of me! I thought that maybe I'd reverse my surgery when I get to where I'm going, but totally changed my mind. I will have to continually remind myself of how things were pre-band. After a lot of time passes, and we are living healthy & feeling strong, the pain of "before" tends to fade. Since I don't believe we're ever cured of this affliction, going back to where I came from, isn't an option :wacko:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I for one know that I would gain all the weight back if my band were to be removed.

Back in 2009 when I first got to 190 I thought I could handle this journey by myself. After all my wife and I were banded together. The last 20 pounds that I lost to get to 190 were really do to having my band to tight and having to deal with the reflux and coughing at night and sleeping almost upright in my bed so I had my first complete unfill and quickly gained 30 pounds over the next six months due to lots of snacking between meals. It was "see food eat food", then I started getting fills again but did not change my eating habits.

I had my band to tight again and had to have another complete unfill and found out that my esophagus had dilated and took two months to heal.

Of course I stop exercising and kept up my snacking but know also started eating late at night. Had a few small fills because I was scared of getting to tight.

Needless to say by January 1, 2013 I had made my way back to 250 pounds and that is when I recommitted my self. I lost 10 pounds in January but for most of February I was stuck at 240 and did not matter what I would do I would not gain or lose.

In March I had acute pancreatitis and had to have my gallbladder removed (family tradition). So for 4 days I was in the hospital and I could not eat and the doctors put a tube in me help drain the gallbladder so it could be removed. Not a great way to do the "the 5 day pouch test" but it had a sobering effect on me.

So I have now gone back to exercising mostly band resistance training and walking. Get up early in the morning between 4 and 5 to I get to bed around 9 so I am not tempted to raid the refrigerator, No eating after 7 in the evening. taking small bites and putting the fork down between bites. And I do try to get on this board at least once a day.

What has been really helpful has been the following from Mis73 profile "The band isn't supposed to limit your portions, make you feel stuffed full, or physically stop you from eating anything. It's supposed to help you to feel satiated on less food for longer periods of time. To better understand it, read here: The Lap-Band is NOT About Restriction"

So hopefully when I get back down to 190 and lower I will not get cocky and remember to stay focus and keep going on the journey.

Good luck on what you decide to do.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would think about getting a complete un fill before having removed. See how that works out for you.

I know from personal experance that when i had my tt and all my fill was removed... i gained 10 in 6 weeks. Thats when i realized that i'm terrified of not having my band.... i need her to keep me accountable for the crap i really want to eat but can't... if you choose to get your band out... good luck i hope you the best.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So I got the lapband in Nov 2010. I do need to exercise and i don't always eat the right foods.

All I can say my dear is this is the problem right here. You can't expect to lose weight if you aren't eating right and exercising. I was banded a month after you and I have finally reached my goal. You have to follow your doctor's order in order to be successful. Good luck and congratulations on your upcoming wedding.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It has been three years for me also, and I have lost 67 lbs. I feel good, look so much better but now I have stomach juices coming out my nose at night. I do not eat after 7 but for some reason the bile is coming out. I have an upper GI scheduled for Monday. My Dr. told me that they are doing less and less of lap bands, as they feel they take out 40%. Wow that is a high percentage. I do like the full feeling right away, and I cannot eat a lot of things. But I much rather be deprived food types than be grossly over weight. I have to lose another 50 lbs, and I do think I will but it will be slow.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My Dr. told me that they are doing less and less of lap bands, as they feel they take out 40%. Wow that is a high percentage. I do like the full feeling right away, and I cannot eat a lot of things. But I much rather be deprived food types than be grossly over weight. I have to lose another 50 lbs, and I do think I will but it will be slow.

Right there is the reason I went with the band. You never hear about a doctor taking out a sleeve or bypass. It aint gonna happen. Once you're sleeved or bypassed, there you are. There's no going back! Lucky for the 40% who now have more options than someone who had their stomachs removed.

tmf

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×