Making it to goal and then a big let down.

[his_spirit 62]

The past year has been incredible. Struggling for quite a few months in the beginning to get the hang of my band and ever so slowly losing the weight. Many of us have been there. The joy at reaching a milestone. The tears when we do not.

I had never really felt successful in life at much of anything and I became so driven to be successful with this.

Once I had my confidence up and was getting closer to goal, I took up yoga and began to do that 6 days a week. It was my new addiction. Inside, I was so proud of myself and amazed at the things my body could do after being a couch potato for 20 years. I wanted more. To see more change in my body so I took up bootcamp 4 days a week at 6am in addition to the yoga. My body developed muscles that I never knew existed. I loved my body (except for the saggy boobs) more than I did in my 20s. I was confident. Reached my goal and wanted to pay it forward to other people. I decided to take my yoga instructor certification course just to show myself that I could do it and could encourage others.

Around this same time, I decided that I didn't want to keep losing as I was getting too thin and physically could not eat enough food to sustain my activity level so I got a bit of an unfill. I began my yoga teacher certification and it was intense. I was not nearly as flexible as many in the class but it didn't matter. I was there. Doing it. The very last class I pushed myself too far and tore slightly a tendon in my shoulder. I got my certification and continued going to regular classes.

A week later, I could not turn my head or raise my arm and I was soooo hungry. This was 3 months ago. Since then I have regained 12 lbs and have not exercises a minute. I was becoming so depressed and fell back into my old habits of using food for comfort. Cheesies and ice cream. I felt like all I worked for was in vain.

I got a small fill last week that feels close to how it was before I got the unfill and I am optimistic. Tomorrow, I am going to my first yoga class in 3 months but have to take it very easy.

Not sure this post will help anyone but I just wanted to share my story in the hope that it does. We all struggle at some point or another. Even us "successful" ones.

I also realized tonight that none of it was in vain because I learned to listen to my body and that I can do it.

That does count for something.

[lakegirl88 13]

YES it counts Thank you for being real! I really needed this !!!! I my self am going through this

[DELETE THIS ACCOUNT! 12,703]

I think you're doing great!! I mean, look how far you've come!!

You had a very small gain and you're regaining control over the situation. That's something to be proud of!

[stept04 465]

It's an inspiration to see people pick themselves back up after a slip. I am just starting this journey and I'm a perfectionist which is not good especially in this en devour. If I fall I'll have a tendency to beat myself up, and that won't do me any good. So it was good hearing your story and know that I should not beat myself up but get back on the horse and keep riding. I'm so glad you did pick yourself up and start again. Thanks for sharing.

~~~Stephanie

[☠carolinagirl☠ 18,722]

one small side step does NOT out weigh the giant leap you took and made......

[mrsto 2,925]

Yes - you are doing great! Life is up and down; never a straight path. For most of us, the scale reflects the way we deal with those ups & downs.

12 pounds is not a lot of weight, considering where you came from. You took the bull by the horns, got a fill, and you're now back on track. THAT is what it's all about!

My doctor told me that over time, with the band, people sometimes feel that they are doing the work & don't really need to lean on the band anymore. He said that most all of them start to gain weight if they unfill it. We get so used to it, that it seems "normal".

Something else that stuck with me through the years.... A diet doctor told me that weight loss success isn't about being a perfect dieter. It's about being able to get right back on track after a bad food day...or a few days, etc. That really stuck with me, because so many of us have that horrible feeling when "we blow it". Again, that is life. I don't believe for one minute that anyone here....or anywhere else, doesn't veer off path; either at one meal, one day or a week.

Thanks for your post......and sharing your struggles and strength.

[mrsto 2,925]

It's an inspiration to see people pick themselves back up after a slip. I am just starting this journey and I'm a perfectionist which is not good especially in this en devour. If I fall I'll have a tendency to beat myself up, and that won't do me any good. So it was good hearing your story and know that I should not beat myself up but get back on the horse and keep riding. I'm so glad you did pick yourself up and start again. Thanks for sharing.

~~~Stephanie

Stephanie - I spent years in therapy to move past the perfectionist mentality. NOT easy! It comes from a critical parent. My father always prided himself on being a perfectionist, but in reality, he was (and still is) a very neurotic man. Don't get me wrong....I love him to death, but being raised by him really messed me (and my sisters) up. Long past the time that our parents "parent" us, their critical voice becomes our own. We beat ourselves to a pulp for not being perfect; doing everything exactly right ALL the time. But lets face it......life isn't perfect, and neither are we. That is what makes us human.

When dealing with this in therapy some years ago, the shrink du jour made an analogy to shooting a movie. When they're filming, they have "take 1, take 2, take 3"......take God knows how many times, until it's right. In life, a mistake is a mis-take

[mrsto 2,925]

PS: Sometimes blowing a diet isn't a mis-take, it's a choice. But then we can "choose" to get right back on track. Life can be sloppy sometimes.....certainly not pristine and perfect.

I guess the whole "perfect" thing presses a huge button for me

[CHEZNOEL 4,061]

Everyone has setbacks. What is important is getting back up on the wagon. I wish you well!

[his_spirit 62]

Thank you for the encouragement everyone. I know that 12 lbs does not sound like a lot and it isn't but I was starting to get scared that I was on my way up much more than that. Felt so out of control for a while. Thankfully, I think I am getting back there. Back to basics of tracking and doing what I need to do.

[Liveforit 0]

I am trying to work my way through a slight unfill and then a 10 lb. weight gain. So, it's nice to know that someone else started gaining afte a slight unfill as well. I am going back to the doctor on the 26th to have Fluid put back in my band, and I am hoping that this will get me back on track as well. I too was too thin and that was shy I decided to have the slight unfill. Now all of pants are a little bit more snug than usual and I feel so defeated. All I can do is try not to gain anymore until I can get back to the doctor.

I hope that everything is back in line for you and that you're back to exercising and being comfortable once again. Have you lost the 12 lbs. that you gained?

[dawalsh 919]

You have been successful thus far. 12 lbs. is just a bump in the road. You're on the right track and that 12 lbs will be off before you know it. Good luck to you!

[brianb 81]

Not sure this post will help anyone but I just wanted to share my story in the hope that it does.

Helped me. Thank you for posting.

Injury is something I'm constantly dealing with. I've always found exercise to be the most effective tool for me in terms of weight loss. But it's so easy to get injured and happens too often.

Also the information about your unfill is interesting. To me it helps to show the power of the band.