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Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I signed the financing papers today...agreeing to pay back $21,936.24 with interest included. My date is set for May 15th, 2013.

My start with weight issues goes as far back as I can remember with my first memory when I was 5 and crying because I didn't want to wear a bikini to the beach. How do you have body image issues when you're 5? After speaking to my Mom about this memory she was upset...telling me that I was a healthy weight as a child. I have no memories of my family ever saying anything negative to me.

In high school I was considered a giant...I'm 5'10" tall and graduated at 190 or so. I would give anything to be there now. I was healthy and active when I was younger.

I started to put on weight when I became a server...all that delicious food! I managed to keep weight off because I was constantly on my feet. Then came my sedentary lifestyle. I literally sit at a desk all day yet continued eating all those rich foods and more of them! The heavier I became the more I ate...you know the drill.

I've spent thousands of dollars on weight loss and never got anywhere. Last year, my Mom had a heart attack and had a stent placed. Only one...but it was scary. My Dad was diagnosed with diabetes about 20 years ago and just in February suffered a minor stroke. They detected three blocked arteries in his heart and he underwent a triple bypass...exactly one month ago today. He has overcome alcoholism, my Mom lost 60 lbs 10 years ago and kept it off...and they go through this. I had to start asking myself some serious questions.

Is this the path I wanted to take? Did I want to continue playing Russian Roulette with this amazing body I have? Although my parents have made healthy changes...they still did damage...I only hope I'm not too late. Even if this is my fate, I will enjoy every last minute in this gift...my body. Life is too short and I'm sick of asking myself what if!!??

The time is now, and I'm thrilled to start this new chapter of my life. This tool...will be only that. There is nothing more precious than life, and my aim is to start living it. I start this journey with the trip of a lifetime to Hawaii. I return home to my first appointments with my medical team and a liquid diet and will have this surgery on May 15th of this year.

What an amazing year this is going to be! These changes, right from morbidly obese damage(my current weight is 310 lbs), to my goal weight of 159lbs, I look forward now to every day that I wake up breathing.

My new goal is to run in a marathon. I turn 40 this year, so hope to run in the Queen City Marathon on my 42nd birthday!

Thanks for reading everyone...and for all the support I've already received here. It means a lot. Band together now has a whole new meaning for me! Many of you are truly inspirational...and I look forward to becoming a member of Onederland, having hundreds of NSV's and even getting on the scale!

Thanks to all of you...for being you!

Leanne

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Congrats on taking back your life! I related to alot of what you said. Lots of the same reasons I was banded as well. I turned 40 this past December and I said that I would not wait another year to get the help. I call this year Transformation 40! And it has already proved to be successful!

Keep this great attitude and you will do fine.

Congrats again.

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Good for you! As a fellow Canuck that is also self-pay, the cost is daunting. I can see you have come to the same decision as me-- You are worth it!! You must feel great, knowing that you have gotten yourself 1 step closer to your end goal. Woot! Woot! :D

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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