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What did you tell you family/friends?



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I did not tele my family but since I'm traveling from NYC t denver and have 2 kids, I told my family I had to remove the appendices in Denver as I lost job insurance and could afford NYC doctors. That's what I said and no one is going to make me say something else. They think I'm going for Lipo, gosh I got offended by the comments, LMAO.... I'm leaving Monday, surgery Tuesday. I did tell a couple of friends since I was looking for someone to come w me but they all refused to come. Some I told them I cancelled it, about 3 friends know I'm heading there to do it.

I know they will suspect something is going on when I start losing, but that's my business and I will tell them the truth, "I no longer eat the way I used to." And if anyone insists in knowing what's going on, I"ll tell them the truth, "have liquids for 1 month, chew slowly, don't drink and eat, have lots of Protein, excersice, bla blah blah blah lolololololol

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I'm Hispanic we eat lots of rice, meats, juices, starch. When my mom offers me these foods I seriously tell her, "mom, i want to feel good about my self, you are not helping me." I also feel my friends that! They feel guilty lolololol

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The only people who know that I have the band are my very closest friends and very close family...probably a total of 10 people. I told people at work that I had to have a hernia repaired. In my opinion, no one NEEDS to know. We all know that having a lapband won't magically make us thin, or force us to make healthy food choices, or to exercise. If I'm going to be successful, it's going to be because of the work *I* put in. I don't want my success to be judged as "she lost weight because she has the lapband" or if god forbid I'm not successful, I don't need to hear "...but she has the lapband, and it didn't work". If I fail, it's going to be because of me not doing what needs to be done. This is just a tool, like any other thing people use to lose weight (home delivered meals, weight watchers, other weight loss surgeries, even a gym membership...TOOLS!!). Sadly, it's hard for some to understand or to even want to understand.

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Thanks so much everyone for your stories! For the people who have decided to tell the "truth" that awesome and that's your decision. But I have decided this is my journey, and I'm not going to be judged by people who don't understand what it's like to be me. I workout every day. Have done every diet, play netball several times a week. I'm not taken the "easy way out" as a lot of people will think. I'm making a decision to change my life. For me the hardest part about this is going to be having to stop exercise! You are all such strong people! I am booked in for my first consult with the surgeon next week. Excited and nervous! How long after you began the process did u actually have your surgery?

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I went for my initial consult on Feb 6 and my surgery is scheduled for March 1. Two week pre op diet started Feb 15

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Oh wow Jen yours was nice and quick :) good luck with it all! :)

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Thanks so much everyone for your stories! For the people who have decided to tell the "truth" that awesome and that's your decision. But I have decided this is my journey' date=' and I'm not going to be judged by people who don't understand what it's like to be me. I workout every day. Have done every diet, play netball several times a week. I'm not taken the "easy way out" as a lot of people will think. I'm making a decision to change my life. For me the hardest part about this is going to be having to stop exercise! You are all such strong people! I am booked in for my first consult with the surgeon next week. Excited and nervous! How long after you began the process did u actually have your surgery?[/quote']

I think it's a lot faster if you're a cash patient. My first appt was Jan 7th, and had surgery Feb 5th.

Sent from my iPad using LapBandTalk

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I went to a seminar on December 13th had my initial consult sometime in January and had surgery February 7

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Good for you in deciding to do this and who should know is completely up to you. Usually I share most everything - except when it comes to my weight. For that I long ago gave up having everyone in my business. My family knows and they also know I don't want others (more distant family) to know. At work only 2 close people know. Everyone else I will discuss very little. I'm in a very prominent position at work and didn't need absolutely everyone watching everything I do.

My weight is slow to move and come off. I've been glad so few people know because no one is now wondering why I'm not losing more. I don't want to explain several times a week why my body is not losing what some one else would expect to be normal. We are all are unique in how we respond and what details our journey includes. We may each be in a unique position to share or not to share. Accept your uniqueness and do what is best for you.

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The only people that knew about my surgery was my mother, sister, and grandmother. My grandmother was super negative, she said that I could lose weight without having surgery. I had been battling with my weight for the last 4yrs. My mom and my sister have been my cheerleaders. They encourage me all the time. It's very important to be around positive people.

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Good on you Kimberley for begging your journey and being so strong! :) hot stuff! My Nanna would say exactly the same thing! She is always telling me just to accept the way I was made and be happy with it. I'm not happy! I since starting this topic have told my mum, who I never intended to tell and she was awesome about it and completely supported me. I don't plan on telling work, or my friends. I have told my best friend and my bf. that's it

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I HAVE BEEN VERY PROD OF MY BAND AND MY DR IVE TOLD EVERY ONE IF THEY DONT HAVE ANY THING GOOD TO SAY I DONT REALLY CARE BUT MY JOB IS THE KIND THAT I HAD TO TAKE 2 WEEKS OFF AND HAD MEDICAL SLIP SO PEOPLE AT WORK NEW I REALLY DONT CARE I DID THIS FOR ME NO ONE ELSE SO THE HECK WITH ALL THE BAD NEG ATIVE THINGS AND PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO IDEA THAT THIS IS A VERY HARD THING TO DO MY FAMILY HAS BEEN GREAT HUBBY AND DAUGHTER SHES A NURSE AND SON ALL HAVE JUST BEEN SO GREAT DOWN 45 LBS OTHER DAY AT WORK SOME ONE SAID I JUST DONT SEE THE WEIGHT LOSS AND I SAID WHO CARES I DIDNT DO IT FOR YOU HAHAHAH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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i only told parents and my hubby who hubby doesnt have filtter told his sister who told her mom and ask why did i do if i look fine lord i turned red all i said coooouch !!!! and ur special blanket i didnt talk to him for two days bc if i wanted to tell someone its for me to decide not him its hard for me to tell ppl just bc u dont know what there reaction will be towards the band

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At the beginning, the only people who knew were my parents, brother, and kids' dad. I also told a couple friends who also had WLS surgery. I had so much weight to lose I was afraid of failing in front of everyone. Plus, like many here, I just didn't have the emotional strength to try to defend myself against all the judgement.

As time went on, I told more people. Now, it's public knowledge I have the Lap Band. The few times I've been told I'm taking "the easy way out", I responded "If restricting my calories to under 1200 daily and walking 2 miles a day is the easy way, I'd hate to see the hard way".

Overall, most people have been very supportive and excited for me.

At the end of the day, you have to do what's best for you. If you don't want to tell anyone then don't. You don't owe anyone any explanations. If you change your mind in the future and want to share it, great, but if not that's ok too.

Best wishes.

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    • LeighaTR

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      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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