Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

I Feel Alone...



Recommended Posts

I feel alone right now. I am the only one in my household that has any issues with my weight. I've been banded since July. I'm having trouble being motivated for exercise, eating better, Portion Control, and all out support. My spouse tries to help but he's not great at it. He tries to make things easier for me to eat and to cook better things but... he's still a meat-and-potatoes kind of guy. I don't always have time to cook since I go to school at night. I try to make sensible, healthy choices but I feel like I'm faltering. I've started keeping a food diary at the recommendation of one of my aftercare specialists. I also get easily bored with food. I can't eat the same thing all the time. I can for a little while until I burn myself out on it but then I won't eat it for a long time.

I don't like to sound like I'm whining but I feel utterly alone. My husband doesn't know what it feels like to want to eat, know you should eat, but if you don't eat slow or in small amounts that it hurts and you actually feel better throwing up than digesting what you ate. I don't think I understand what it's supposed to feel like right now. I've been banded for 3 months and I've only lost 20 lbs. I would ask if that's bad/good/okay/normal/etc. but I understand that everyone is different. I went to the clinic last week and we added some Fluid since I had no change in my weight. I didn't lose or gain anything; which is good but also bad.

Normal day eating is as follows:

Breakfast: Atkins Advantage Meal bar/light meal bar & coffee

Lunch: Soup, crackers, water/tea

Snack: jicama, cucumber, or beef Jerky. (Any one of those, not all)

Dinner: some form of Protein, starch/carbs, vegetables

Drinking: Water, tea, diet pepsi with lime juice, coffee

Exercise: I walk around at work since I work a desk job, try to go to the gym and hit the weights or do some cardio but lacking motivation right now.

Help!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can relate to living with someone who has no issues with weight...and it's difficult, but at least your husband seems to be making an effort to be supportive of your efforts.

If you are experiencing difficulties with eating, and if you are vomiting at all, you need to consult with your surgeon, because this is not normal and could actually harm your band.

There are a number of items you listed on your diet which are expressly forbidden on my post op diet. It would be helpful to consult with a registered dietitian or nutritionist to get some understanding of ways to improve your weight loss and to feel better in the process.

Best wishes...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First, you're not alone. You're on a forum with many others just like you and we understand :)

Your husband sounds like a great guy. He may not understand, but at least he tries, I see so many on here with spouses that don't support them or even worse berate them for getting the band. I know it's hard to explain what you're going through to a person who's never been through it, but keep talking to him and sharing your experience with him. You may be surprised just how supportive he can be when including in the process both physically and emotionally.

As for your weight loss, I agree with Carole above. A nutritionist would help you tremendously. I would recommend journaling your food intake for a week or two then taking that journal into a nutritionist, this way they can tell you where you need to make some changes as well as what you need to continue.

I know for me, the information I learned from my nutritionist has been crucial. I honestly don't think I'd have been even nearly as successful without the food guidelines she helped me establish.

Best wishes to you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I dont think you should even be drinking diet soda. Is your tea suager free? then what about the coffee? sounds like you get in to much caffine to me but I could be wrong.

You may want to go back and read all the paper work you were gave about your post-op diet. I think some of the things you are trying to eat is what is making you feel sick and not want to eat.

Also your NOT suppose to be drinking with your meals, You are suppose to wait at least 30 minutes after you eat. Then at 3 months in I dont think you are suppose to be eating BEEF yet but not real sure on that. I would not think beef Jerky would be a good choice even if you could eat beef its really tough, and dry so I think it would be hard on your new smaller stomach.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You really are not alone at all! As a matter of fact, you are in good company here. I think I lost about 15 lbs the first few months. I had several fills before I felt real restriction. My life on the inside had changed forever, but, everything else seemed to stay the same. How do you change when this happens?

Its a learning process. Concentrate on what you need to do instead of what you don't need to do. Like, Protein in the morning instead of junk. Like dragging yourself to the gym or around the block when you want to lay on the couch. Drink your Water, eat smaller portions, reward yourself when you hit small goals. Be good to yourself. Forgive yourself when you goof up because you will goof up.

So, its been a year for me. I'm down 47lbs. Had an injury two weeks ago and have not exercised other than walking. Been eating too much junk food. In other words, I fell completely off the wagon. But, I went to the fill center today and got .5 cc's more. Glad to be on a liquid diet for 48 hours to snap back to good behavior. Back on the wagon.

Remember, its not how you fall down, its how you get back up! Go for it, push!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't drink during meals any more. It's usually before or after. Everything is sugar free. coffee is once a day, if at all on the weekends.

Beef jerky: yes it's dry and like shoe leather but it's something to gnaw on. That's what I've been wanting lately is something to gnaw on. Gum is a great substitute and I'm getting some later this week.

Soups: progresso light or regular Soup. I'm down to 1 cup now since it's mostly liquid. I bought some small storage bowls and I pour 1/2 my can of soup into the bowl then eat the other half.

Crackers: baked goldfish that are tossed into the soup and it's always less than the serving size (55 crackers).

Tea: 5 calorie drink mixes you add to a bottle of Water.

Jicama: (root vegetable that is the consistency of a potato but semi sweet like an apple) They have crunch to them and that's good.

I'm sure some of you are like "why not eat a salad?" I can only entertain that idea for so long before the food spoils or I can't stomach it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To me, it sounds like you are not eating enough.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To me, it sounds like you are not eating enough.

I know for me if I don't get the required minimum amount of Protein and Water in each day my weight loss slows down. Also amber is right maybe you aren't eating enough or as often as you need to. I myself have noticed that since moving to mushies I have spaced my meals further apart, which really I was told to eat every 2 hrs. If I space it further apart I do try to make sure that what I eat is closer to 20gms of Protein than not so that even though the meals are spaced further apart I'm still getting the right amount of protein. My Dr. has a dietician on staff to help us with these kinds of eating issues, if yours has one I would definitely talk to them too and see if they can offer you some professional advice. Good luck! ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I understand your pain I'm dealing with my own problems of not seeing weight come off as quickly as I want. I also don't think ur eating the right things or mix it up a bit so u dont get bored. Maybe try for Breakfast Greek yogurt with fresh fruit and granola? Also I find that if I have a Protein Shake it fills u up and helps u not each the wrong things. I use a Protein shake call Designer whey in chocolate mixed with 8 oz of Skim Milk Plus or skim milk. And for lunch I have few crackers with humus. Wish u all the best

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I sent an email to my the nutritionist at my doc's office and based off of what she said, I'm doing fine regarding what I'm consuming. The things she's cautioning me on is to move away from the Soup and crackers at lunch and to decrease the starches and carbs at dinner. I'm still getting my Water and Protein. I'm trying to change up what I want/eat but it's hard. I usually fixate on something for a while then I get bored with it and move on to something else. Trying to continue eating healthy without getting bored is rather difficult. My nutritionist also suggested a blog called Bandfriendly recipes. I'm going to look there for some inspiration on dinners. I saw they have some delicious sounding breakfasts too.

I'm supposed to only be getting around 1200 cals a day and I've been getting more than that up until last week when I got some Fluid added. I'm thinking I'm going to get more Fluid added on the 29th too. I've got a small amount of restriction going on but I don't think it's enough yet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know it's really hard, but try and cut out all soda. I was a heavy diet soda drinker. 2~3 32 oz drinks per day. I started cutting back to nothing two weeks before my surgery and now I am going on 19 months with out any carbonated drinks whatsoever. I think that has been a big factor in my weight loss.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×