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Not Really Understanding This Board.



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I understand the frustration when you see posts that go against all the "rules" you have been told and are trying to stick to. I also understand how you may feel being an RN and have more medical training than other folks. BUT........

Every surgeon has their own set of "rules". For example, I see so many posts about people "cheating" on their liquid pre-op diets. This makes no sense to me as I did not have a liquid pre-op diet. My pre-op was 2 weeks of Atkins to shrink the liver and it worked great. I don't understand why people are being put through all that, but that is what their surgeon wants. It seems like a punishment to me.

Another example: I've heard many people say their surgeon told them no alcohol for the rest of their life and other surgeons say none for the first 6 months.

Another example: I was not required to jump through any pre-op hoops except the Atkins. I do mean zero.... no blood tests, no sleep study, no shrink ........ nothing.

Another example: Many surgeons require patients to stop smoking, others do not.

I could go on forever with all the different rules.........

My "rules" may be very different than your "rules", but we both can see success with this band :)

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yes.. I agree with you B-52, and ducker... there are some people that should never be banded. I have talked to some of them who come to me wanting to know about how it helped me. Im sure you get those same conversations. I think people who have bingeing issues are going to find themselves in a whole world of trouble if they dont fix that emotional issue first before getting banded. You binge with a band and you can do some real damage. There were issues that I found out about myself that I didnt realize and had to emotionally deal with them along the way... I still deal with some. I envy you B-52 for having it be second nature. Im not there yet. I still have to tell myself to eat and not get so famished that I start grabbing for things that are the wrong things. That is my biggest issue... not the portions or chewing.. just making sure I eat frequently and dont put myself in situations where Im so hungry that I eat too quickly etc. I think this conversation is a great thing to help people figure out that although we talk about "the rules" and all... it all boils down to making good choices.. and Lap Band cant help you there... you have to still make wise decisions and if emotionally you are not ready to do that you should THINK hard before you band!

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I think it's important to tell someone who has eaten inappropriately that it's normal to screw up and even to deliberately decide to do something wrong if it keeps them from going completely crazy. So, for example, you drink with meals sometimes and overeat. It's not a big deal if small abberations keep you generally on the program. For some people, the adjustment is easy, but for others it's not, and we try to be understanding of those who are having a hard time. I haven't seen what you're seeing, but that's because I don't look at the responses to most of the posts. I just delete the e-mail and leave the thread to others who may have more informed or positive comments. You can spend your precious time wallowing in other people's troubles when you could be spending doing something nice for yourself!

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Do or die- mine was do or waste your life away in a wheelchair. I have been criticized as a low BMI bander- why didn't I just lose the weight? Why? Because I have the same problem we all have- I can't keep it off. I can lose it a hundred times over. I needed a tool to help me with portion size. I couldn't be happier and and trying my hardest to learn how to live with the band. I understand your frustration with the site- last night I posted about managing head hunger and most of the responses I got were related to portion size. While there were a few great responses about head hunger I was discouraged. Especially after someone criticized me for not going through the pre-surgery counseling- the person stated it should be mandatory... What? If I had waited any longer who knows what my condition would have been. Sorry now I am venting, the point is when asking for advice you expect advice, shared experiences, not opinions.

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I didn't mean for this to come off as so gripy or bitchy if you will. I guess I get frustrated sometimes because I was like B-52. It was a do or die situation for me. So I really value my band. Not that others don't but I know I have this ONE shot to make it right so to speak. That means a lot to me so I know I'll try even harder to make it work.

And yes, I do come here for encouragement and it can be discouraging when you're reading a thread and it's just filled with "Oh that's no big deal. Go ahead and do it!"

Anyway, this was probably more a vent for me than anything else. Thank you for listening.

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I don't think your post sounded gripy or bitchy really. I do understand. Your rules just may be very different than other's. I think most of us were a do or die situation. Some may not realize just how bad off we were/are. If we reach a BMI that is morbidly obese ........ the word "morbid" should be indication it is do or die.

I started with a BMI just over 43 and that is well in to the morbid range. I'm now sitting in the normal range! wooo hooo! (but I could still die tomorrow)

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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