Is there really a "do over"

birdee · January 27, 2004

Where to start??!!??

I really don't know where to start. I do know this.......I was banded back in July. To date I have lost 20 pounds. A lot of my own doing mind you. I am having to STRUGGLE with the whole no eating and drinking thing. I am up to about 3.4 CC's and I can tell a big difference! I CAN'T eat and drink anymore. I feel so discouraged because I see where other people that were banded after me have almost met there goal. I knew this surgery was going to be a struggle, I just did not imagine it would be this hard!!!!!! I am consumed at work all day long and it is impossible to exercise. My life is so busy that I can barely get in Water.....if you can imagine.....I just don't know what to do anymore. I would not trade my band for all of the money in the world....but I am scared that I am that person that is not going to be successful, I have however made up my mind to workout at least once a week.....for starters. Is there anyone out there that feels my "pain" I just need to be encouraged right now! I need to know that I still have a chance at success!!!

Thanks for listening/reading! :cry

donali · January 27, 2004

Hi Birdee -

First of all, it is never too late to put your tool to good use. However, you are going to HAVE to make some major changes in your lifestyle.

You HAVE to make time for yourself. Really. If you are overcommitted and honestly do not have time to even get in your Water, then you need to find a way to get out from under some of those commitments.

I know for myself, one of my biggest problems was saying "no". I just could NOT say no to anyone or anything - except for myself. I was ALWAYS last, if at all.

Please take a few moments and think about your day. Legally your job is required to give you a 15 minute break every five hours, and at least 1/2 hour lunch. That should be a 15 minute break in the morning, 15 minutes in the afternoon, and at least 1/2 hour lunch.< /p>

Set up a routine that is reasonable, and schedule your needs in there. Keep your appointments with yourself - YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!.

Without more information about what you are eating, when, how often you PB if at all, it is hard to give you more specific advice. But even the tone of your post translated to me as frantic and overwhelmed. I think you need to look at that. Once you have some routines in place you can up your commitments, but until then you are "never going to have time."

It is up to you to make the time - you are the only one who can do this.

Good luck, and remember - it's never too late!

shellyj · January 27, 2004

hey birdee!

technically they are called Mulligans! and you bet your ass there are mulligans!

so things havent gone the way you had planned as of yet? well there are things you can do!!!!

First off- Donali is right, you have to decide you are worth this TO MAKE TIME FOR IT!!!! NUMBER ONE PRIORITY!!! think of it this way~ how will you take care of all your other *projects* if you havent taken care of yourself?

set up a few goals for the day EVERY DAY!!! CROSS THEM OFF AS YOU ACCOMPLISH THEM!!! i LOVE to throw away my 'to do list' because it is COMPLETE!!!

examples:

1. do not drink with meals

2. drink ATLEAST 64 oz Water a day (a easy way to measure is to drink 3 20 oz bottles a day.

3. eat your protien first then veggies then carbs

4. Dont compare yourself to others

remember this isnt a race you have the band for life. Now that you realize you ready for a change MAKE IT HAPPEN!

Kiera · January 27, 2004

Birdee,

It sounds like you need "tuff band love" so - *get a grip*! ;-) Ok, now that the little slap is out of the way. Know this, you CAN do this! You just need to get a grip on yourself and your environment. What kind of diet are you eating? Do you track your food? If not, go sign up for fitday.com and do so. Make sure you are getting ENOUGH food first of all. If you are not getting 1000-1500 calories you may be put yourself in starvation mode. If you are getting more than that then you need to plan your meal situation better.

If you have not tried it yet I would really suggest putting yourself on a strict Atkins style high Protein low carb diet. Make SURE you are getting enough Protein, you can suppliment with shakes or bars. You should be getting 60 grams of protein per day. Also make sure you are taking Vitamins. I take Kirkland children's chewables (2 per day). The chewables make it easy to swallow and this particular brand does not have any added sugar.

As for the Water - I HEAR you, that is hard for me too. I have got a brita filter pitcher that I keep on my desk. I try to remind myself to drink a pitcher per day. I don't always succeed but at least if the pitcher is sitting there I have a better chance of drinking. If that doesn't work for you get a sports bottle with a straw - that at least cannot spill as easily as a regular glass. Water is the easiest thing to get right - if you have planned ahead.

I also have a hectic life - but I try to walk at least 15 minutes each morning and evening - on the way to work. That is about the only real exercise I get - but it has helped. I have been banded since the end of april and am down 60 pounds. You would not think half an hour of fairly normal walking would make a difference but it does. Every little bit helps. Find somebody at work to walk with at lunch if you can - 15 to 30 mins a day will do WONDERS. honest!

Also, if you can handle it you might try doing a liquid diet for a couple weeks to kick your body into losing mode - then go on atkins. I have seen several bandits who had joined weight watchers after banding so that they would have the accountability of the weigh ins and the convenience of the way they do the calorie counting. It certainly could not hurt to see if you can fit something like that into your schedule.

Only you can control your weight. Don't let past failures screw with your present. Start fresh - THIS DAY - and forget all that negative stuff. Make yourself a grid chart and mark your weight on it each day or week (a week is more healthy but go with what feels right). Try to average a loss of ONE POUND PER WEEK - it may not sound like much but it will add up before you know it. If you can just manage your diet and even a LITTLE BIT OF WALKING each day you can do it.

This weightloss thing is not a sprint, it is a journey. So you have hit a few speed bumps - life goes on - you can do this, just set your mind to it and DO it!!!

Get yourself a pad of brightly colored post-it notes:

:Bunny Stick one on your desk (or monitor) that reminds you to drink your water.

:Bunny Put one on your bathroom mirror reminding you that today is a new day and you CAN do even better on this day than you have in the past.

:Bunny Put one on your fridge that reminds you that nothing tastes as good as thin feels.

:Bunny Put one on your scale - perferably over the number window *grin* - that reminds you to hang in there and that numbers are not everything - how you feel about yourself is KEY.

:Bunny Put one on the inside of your front door and remind yourself that while you do not control the wind you DO control your sails. This is your journey, grab it by the wheel and steer already! ;-)

birdee · January 27, 2004

I could just kiss you all. I feel so much better!!!!!! :kiss

I guess I thought all of this time things would be easy...Since I could noly eat so little....why not eat what I want and enjoy it?? Maybe my way of thinking has been all screwed up! I really was under the impression that I did not have to diet......well I now know that I must hold myself accountable for everything I do and eat!!!!!!!!! I do better on the weekdays with my eating. I normally do a couple of bites of Yogurt, or cottage cheese and a juice of Frappacino in the bottle. lunch, fast food......but like less than half....Dinner what ever is cooked...smaller portions....I got this band thinking and hoping that I could eat "normal" If there is every a thing......I did not realized that I still needed to be conscious. Now I am more in a panic!!!!! If possible. please anyone out there give me some of your typical days intake....that will give me an idea on how I can change my eating behaviour....As I am typing this I am going to send out an email to my friend and invite her to walk........that will hold me accountable....I know she'll say yes...if not, I'll walk alone. I am also going to crack open a bottled of Water and MAKE myself finish it by bed time....small steps....thanks everyone for the advice. I am going to use it wisely...I am going to post on the board asking for menu ideas!

I feel so much better!!!!!

Birdee!:banana

donali · January 28, 2004

Hi Birdee -

You don't have to "diet", but you do have to be conscious. I do NOT diet - but 70% of the time I eat very healthy and nutritious foods. I do not deny myself anything, nothing is labelled "bad". Sometimes I go on a puffy Cheeto binge, or OD on chocolate. But because these things are not forbidden, I only have them when I really really really want them.

Dieting mentality undermines your self-esteem and creates cravings, resulting in binges and self-recrimination. Not necessary. But do evaluate what you're eating, and why. Do you really really need a cheeseburger, or would a chicken breast work for you just as well? Most of the time the chicken breast suffices, so have that instead. For the times a chicken breast just won't do, have the cheeseburger.

Just my advice, and it has been working for me. I'm not blazing the weightloss trail with speed, but -84 in a year is respectable. I'll take it! And I'm not unhappy or deprived, and I'm not killing myself with exercise. I'm living what I feel is a "normal" life for me.

Kiera · January 28, 2004

Birdee - don't panic. Technically you don't have to "diet" but given that you are not losing weight that does seem like the best way to get yourself going. Keep in mind that diet does not have to be that horrible D word anymore. In fact, check out the dictionary entry for diet. Nowhere in there does it say the words miserable, malnourished, or any of those yucky things that the word tends to bring to mind. Diet is a manner of living - the manner you adopted when you climbed up on that operating table last july. Take this word and OWN it - don't let it own you.

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Main Entry: 1di·et

Pronunciation: 'dI-&t

Function: noun

Etymology: Middle English diete, from Old French, from Latin diaeta, from Greek diaita, literally, manner of living, from diaitasthai to lead one's life

1 a : food and drink regularly provided or consumed b :habitual nourishment c : the kind and amount of food prescribed for a person or animal for a special reason

2 : something provided especially habitually <a diet of Broadway shows and nightclubs -- Frederick Wyatt>

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The band is there to help you - you just have to meet it half way. Even if you dont start an "official diet" - try to watch what you are eating and stick to the healthier choices - that ALONE will help.

If the idea of dieting brings on all kinds of "previous (pre-surgery) life trauma" then try this. Make yourself a diet menu - and *gasp* give yourself a cookie or some other 50 calorie *naughty* item EACH AND EVERY DAY! You don't have to be starved and miserable to be successful in a diet. You just need to keep your daily caloric intake under control. You can do that! Past performance is NEVER a good indicator of the future - let go of it and move on. Take charge - you can!

birdee · January 28, 2004

I am loving the advice that you all have given me. Very reasonable. I will have you know that I have a bottle of Water on my desk right now!!!!:confused:

I like the idea of treating myself with a low cal naughty!!!!!! I really appreciate you all taking the time to "be real" with me and not slamming me for my indiscretions! I am going to make a change in my life! I ate lunch today, when my food came I pushed the drink aside!!!!! I did not touch it! It's a hard habit that I have to break and I WILL!

I am going to do a very strick eating regiment to jump start my weightloss and see how it goes from here.....

Well gotta go and drink my water:rambo

Birdee