Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

I'm just a blubbering idiot!



Recommended Posts

My surgery is next Monday 2/6, and I just finished writing a letter to my children in case something goes horribly wrong and I don't make it. Did anyone else do anything like this? I know the odds are pretty slim that something will happen, but I really felt led to put some of my hopes and desires for them down on paper.

And now I'm sitting at my desk blubbering. How strong were everyone else's fears before surgery?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Elisa, you're perfectly normal. I did the exact same thing. Still have the letter sitting in my husband's desk upstairs.

By the time they wheeled me in for surgery, had my legs not been jelly, I would have gotten up and ran lol ... but today, I'm soooooooo thankful I didn't.

You're going to be fine! We all get nervous before hand. If you weren't nervous, that would be cause to worry.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Elisa, you're perfectly normal. I did the exact same thing. Still have the letter sitting in my husband's desk upstairs.

Thanks so much. Question for you -- did you write one to your husband, or just your kids? The way the one to the kids wrecked me, I don't know if I can handle writing another one!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am having my surgery done next week and I intend to do all the last letters! I went one sad step further. My daughter will be making her first holy communion NEXT YEAR so last weekend I went out and bought her dress and headdress just in case I don't pull through. This coming weekend I'm going out for the last supper with my family. I think everyone feels nervous about the op.

Anna

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

could have been me starting this thread i done all the letter writing too, at least it got me to write my will something i had been putting of for years,

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wrote to my kids, husband and my parents before surgery, I also got a hefty life insurance policy just in case I wanted to know they would be taken care of, I got my living will in order, my will and my trust all in order as well and I was still scared. Knowing my surgons have never lost a lap-band patient helped but it was still a scary thing to do. I looked at it this way, I could die because of surgery or I could stay as big as I was and die a slow misrable death at a very early age. Or I could have the surgery, work my ass off to make it successful and have many many more happy years with my kids and family and thats just what I have been doing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't have kids so I didn't do the letter thing, but I talked with my sister who is the executor in my will and told her where all my paperwork is. All my stuff is pretty well spelled out in my will but I made sure she and I were on the same page.

This kind of fear is TOTALLY normal.

What I did was at each step along the way, I told myself "I don't have to do this, I can leave". I mean, EVERY step I was SCARED but there I was putting on my gown going "you can leave" and waiting in the staging area "you can leave and go home" and even as I was laying down on the op table I told myself "I don't have to do this, I can leave and go home and have a nice snack"

Being scared is part of being alive. I think it's beautiful you love your family so much you took the time to write up some stuff. I suggest you pull it out and read it on the one year anniversary of your band!!!

Big hugs from your LBT family!!!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Big ((((((( hugs))))))) to all you future bandsters!!

You are all in the right place and it is normal to have all these feelings. I did both... my boys are in their 20's so when they came to visit I sat and had a face to face.... it was great to say those MOM I LOVE YOU'S in person : - )

Chances are everything will be fine and think of it this way.... all that getting your affairs in order "stuff" should have been done anyway so one thing you can check off your list when you come to in band land : - )

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have my worries too, but let me ask something -- and I really don't know the answer b/c I've never had surgery before.

Why does this surgery scare people so much? I know lots of people who have surgery under general anestheisa, and never thought tiwce about dying, and certainly never drafted living wills or wrote out final farewells.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had never had surgery either and I wasn't scared of the surgery itself. My fear came from afterwards..... what was going to happen to my best friend.... the one who has seen me through the good and bad

M Y F O O D!!!!!

The getting things in order is just common sense..... I think parents handle things a little differently then single people... No offense to anyone : - )

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey Gadgetlady... I too am from Orange County :) However, I don't qualify for surgery in the US... so on Feb. 3rd.... Friday I off to Tijuana for my surgery. You want to talk about scary! I also feel bad that I am not telling my children or my parents or inlaws where I am going or why... I guess I am just afraid that everyone will try to talk me out of it. I think the letters is a wonderful gesture... although most likely not necessary... even so... I think you should keep the letters and give them to the children when they are older... so they know how much you thought of them. Anyway, nice to have someone so close going through the same experience:) Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

:hippie: I think that alot of everyones fears (including mine) is because we are having a WLS and everyone thinks of the complications involved with gastric bypass. I understand surgery is surgery. The other reason is that we made a choice to have this done to us and that we could live without the surgery unlike many other surgeries, but we are a brave strong few that want to make are lives a life again and will risk our lives to achieve this. I too had these fears, but I cannot express the happiness that I have gotten back in my life because of this surgery. Today I was going through my closet to make room for my new summer clothes I will be getting and I found a pair of shorts that I had before I was married and had kids and I tried them on. I expected the shorts to be a little tight and you could not imagine how I felt to find them very baggy:> This surgery was the BEST BEST BEST thing that has ever happined to me (except my kids and husband of course). I now have the power to take control over that evil monster and actually win with weight loss. You guys will be fine, good luck to you and God bless.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think people are concerned in general about Weight loss surgery and dying because... look at the people they are operating on. In general we have not been the healthiest of bunches, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, cholesterol problems, diabeties all raise the risks involved. But even though I was scared I am 100% glad I went through it and i would do it again in a heartbeat.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey GadgetLady - I have surgery on Monday, too.

I don't have kids, either - but I think I will jot down a little last will and testament - just so the state doesn't mess with my DH too much should the worst befall me...

But I really don't expect it. I am just so excited about the whole thing.

Good Luck to both of us!! I will see you on the other side (of the SURGERY, Silly!).

:]

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My fear is not the op itself and I am quite happy with the statistics that show a teeny weeny minority of patients have died due to complications........my fear is the general anesthetic. Any overweight person having this has a larger risk of not pulling through.

Anna

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×