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Do you ever feel like a fraud?!

oldiebutgoodie2

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nomorejellybelly    77

nomorejellybelly
Posted

You shouldn't feel like a fraud for that. Now, me on the other hand, feel like a fraud because I didn't tell people at work about the surgery and everyone's like "how are you doing it?" and I'm just like "Oh, I'm exercising and I had to change the way I eat". I'm not lying, but it's not the whole truth. I just didn't need everyone to know I got the band. It's not a miracle cure. Definitely a tool that has really helped me. I only lost two lbs in June and was disappointed about that, but it was a rough month and I just try not to let myself get down when loss is slow, because I know it will come off. Hang in there.

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oldiebutgoodie2    11

oldiebutgoodie2
Posted

You shouldn't feel like a fraud for that. Now, me on the other hand, feel like a fraud because I didn't tell people at work about the surgery and everyone's like "how are you doing it?" and I'm just like "Oh, I'm exercising and I had to change the way I eat". I'm not lying, but it's not the whole truth. I just didn't need everyone to know I got the band. It's not a miracle cure. Definitely a tool that has really helped me. I only lost two lbs in June and was disappointed about that, but it was a rough month and I just try not to let myself get down when loss is slow, because I know it will come off. Hang in there.

Well, from one fraud to another, I'd like to say thank you for your encouragement and support. Regarding your "fraud," I say let them believe your are doing it with exercise and better eating, cause it's the truth. How many times have you felt like eatng "illegal" food even with the band, but it was your will power and desire for better health (and cuter clothes, or whatever!) that stopped you, NOT that piece of plastic adorning your tummy. Hurray for all of us here! And thank you.

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oldiebutgoodie2    11

oldiebutgoodie2
Posted

When people compliment me on my appearance these days, it's compared to how I used to look. After more than a hundred pound weight loss, I know I look much better than I did. So I sincerely thank them for the compliment, because I know they mean it. If I know them well enough to get personal, I may add that it's been a hard road, but I'm working my ass off - literally! Then we have a chuckle over it, and I thank them again for their kind words, and for noticing the change. (How they COULDN'T notice is beyond me. I've lost a third of my former body weight.)

I know a few pounds up or down aren't going to mean anything to them, compared to the overall weight loss. So there is no sense wasting energy on feeling like a fraud, or even being uncomfortable if I'm up a few pounds. Give me a few days and I'll be back down again. It's all relative, and the general weight direction is downward.

Dave

Thanks. I have appreciated your comments and musings in the past, and today is no exception. Thank you for being such a wise role model. You're doing great. Keep up the good work!

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54Shirley    105

54Shirley
Posted

H*LL NO ! I did this for my health, to stay alive. I wouldn't be here now or even go back 4 years. I was drowning in my own Fluid. So you know I would not have lasted.

So a fraud NO WAY ! I'm alive, and I work at my Health every day. There's nothing Fake about that..

If I died tomorrow, because of this tool,, I know that I have lived.....

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sld21    26

sld21
Posted

I dont feel exactly like that but i feel really uncomfortable when people compliment me on my weight loss like I dont deserve it bc I took the easy way out!!!

There's nothing easy about this. You have got to get over this and be happy with your new self. You don't have to answer to no one.

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sld21    26

sld21
Posted

You shouldn't feel like a fraud for that. Now, me on the other hand, feel like a fraud because I didn't tell people at work about the surgery and everyone's like "how are you doing it?" and I'm just like "Oh, I'm exercising and I had to change the way I eat". I'm not lying, but it's not the whole truth. I just didn't need everyone to know I got the band. It's not a miracle cure. Definitely a tool that has really helped me. I only lost two lbs in June and was disappointed about that, but it was a rough month and I just try not to let myself get down when loss is slow, because I know it will come off. Hang in there.

I do the same thing. I am a teacher and at my previous district...they knew because I had to take the 10 days off..but I am going on my 2nd yr with a new district and never told anyone. I had only been banded about 7 months and had lost maybe 50lbs but they didn't have a side shot to compare to. Now I have lost 58 more pounds and they can tell a difference and they ask how I am doing right and I tell them I exercise (I jog for miles) and I eat right. I also was in their weight watchers at work program though I never kept the stupid points but had comraderie and good recipes. I did tell the meeting lady because she kept griping at me that I was losing more than a pound like her other people. I quietly pulled her aside and told her and made her swear to her secrecy. She looked at me in a condescending way which kept me from telling anybody.

I would rather tell a waiter/waitress when I have to explain why I want them to bring me a box right away or they get concerned when it looks ike I didn't like my food or I share a plate with my husband. At least I won't have to face them again and not work with them. But do I feel like a fraud..no...its my business...my medical business and none of theirs. It's personal. I don't go around telling them how my latest pap smear went.

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brbm6    6

brbm6
Posted

Nope, not at all. I do tell EVERYONE (and I mean everyone) that I am banded. I think if I help even one person than it is worth it. I have a lot of friends who have weight issues and while I am doing the work I want to share about my tool.

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CruiseGirl2011    1

CruiseGirl2011
Posted

I mostly "lurk" on these boards, but anyone that could suggest that this is easy is so terribly misinformed. I have fought the weight battle for years and finally feel that I will accomplish thIs because of my extreme effort. So ANYONE that thinks different is wrong. Please do not reply to me if you do not agree.

All positive folks, best wishes to you!

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sld21    26

sld21
Posted

I mostly "lurk" on these boards, but anyone that could suggest that this is easy is so terribly misinformed. I have fought the weight battle for years and finally feel that I will accomplish thIs because of my extreme effort. So ANYONE that thinks different is wrong. Please do not reply to me if you do not agree.

All positive folks, best wishes to you!

amen!

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Go To Topic Listing POST-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A

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    • LeighaTR

      LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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