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How will Dad's banding affect overweight children?



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I have a surgery date of Feb 20, 2006. My major concern is how my banding will affect my overweight daughters, ages 10, 15, 19 and 25. Will it be positive - they see dad eating better portions, exercising more, thinner. Or will it be negative - "Dad couldn't control weight through "normal" means so I'm just going to bide my time until I'm big enought to get banded too."

Anybody have experience with this?

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I would think it would have a positive affect on your daughters... But everyone is different. My mother, father, sister and I have always been overweight, but I plan on teaching my daughter to eat the right things and Portion Control and maybe she won't have the problems I did.

I really hope that it is a positive experience for your whole family.

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I don't know that there is a generic answer to your question. I know that my son is starting to feel pressure because DH is losing again.

The answer to your question could be yes to both, nor no to both, or somewhere in the middle.

I'm sorry I can't be of more help

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I am really interested in this, also, as my DD is overweight. She's 8 years old, and has problems with portion size, and a BIG sweet tooth. She is watching me with admiration, but it hasn't changed her habits very much...my experience with kids as a teacher says they watch for a LONG time before they start practicing a new habit. Make sure they see that you are working hard and that it's not easy....which shouldn't be too difficult! Hopefully, they will see that surgery is NOT the easy way out.

Cindy

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I think their reactions will depend a lot on their personalities, but setting a good example can't be a bad thing. That's not to say that they won't have trouble adjusting to a slimmer you - there are a lot of complicated emotions that go on when a loved one loses weight. But, even if they are resentful at first I think they'll realize as they mature that having their dear dad around longer because he's healthy is a great thing.

After I read your post I couldn't help but wonder if YOU are the one who is feeling like you're taking the easy way out. So I'm here to tell you - you're not!! You will need to exercise and eat right to make it work. It's a great tool to help with Portion Control, but it's not a cop out. And setting a good example for your daughters will just be the icing on the (fat free sugar free) cake. :(

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My 8 yo daughter has always been a chubby kid, but over the holidays, she spent two months in the states with my parents. In that time, she stacked on 10 lbs!! On her lil 4 ft tall frame that was a massive amount.

She had been eating healthy with me up until that point. When I told her after she got home that it was back to healthy eating, she made the comment of, "Why can't I just have a surgery like you?"

I think kids, or atleast my kid, doesn't mind doing it, as long as they don't know they're doing it. Ie, she's happy to go kick the soccer ball or ride the bike, as long as I don't tell her its exercise. She's happy to eat veggie fritatta for dinner, as long as I don't tell her its loaded with nutrients and 95% fat free...

Good luck :(

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Great question. I figure, they will have seen you both ways. Eating unhealthy and living healthy. After banding, you are putting good habits forward (with a little help). Maybe that will rub off, plus you serve healthier foods. An opinion, Shawn

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Its a tough one. I have to watch my older son, he's the kidn who likes to hide in his room on the Playstation all day and he eats healthy food but eats tons of it. He's 10. Ewan, who's 8 just spends all day burning around outside and is as skinny as a rake. He's also just not that interested in food.< /p>

It's a very fine line with kids between telling them they're getting chubby and destroying their self esteem.

I have just tried to approach this by reinforcing that these days, our way of life leads us to getting fat very easily an that Mum, and Dad for that matter, have both been affected by the last 10 years of hard work we've put into our family and not had a lot of time to look after ourselves. So that now I'm doing something sensible about it, but that if the kids pay attention to being outdoors, getting lots of running around and eating healthy food, they'll never have to suffer this problem. So I think I've managed to divest the whole issue of any emotional/moral connections and reinforce that it's just a health problem I've suffered from. The boys are so proud of what I've done so far.

I also fully intend sometime in the next few years when we've moved to set up a really good home gym, which I hope both boys will make use off during their teen years.

With Eliza, she's only just shy of 3 and I hope all she ever remembers is a healthy mother with no weight issues.

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Check out Ellyn Satter's philosophy on this....her book is: "[ame=http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0967118913/ref=pd_sbs_b_3/002-0779278-4791269?%5Fencoding=UTF8&v=glance&n=283155]Your Child's Weight: Helping Without Harming[/ame]."

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      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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