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Self-Sabotage, I'm the queen :( so with that being said.....how did you find and stick to new coping skills that didn't involve food? I've been an addict so long....How have you been successful long term w/ the band..I'm almost 3 months out...I know I'm not doing my best.

Anyone else in the sabotage boat?

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Im not banded yet but getting my date tomorrow. Im terrified of sabotaging myself. I have done it for so long which has got me where I am now. I definately need to change slot of bad habits. Thinking of getting back into therapy to help guide me through this process.

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I'm going to be honest with you; for me, it hasn't been easy. I finally broke down and started seeing a therapist because I've always been an emotional eater. And as crazy as this may sound, I've shed a few tears over not being able to enjoy food like I used to. I've likened it to almost like losing a friend or a part of yourself. No one really tells you that this is not just a physical journey, but a very emotional one as well. Just keep reminding yourself why you are opting for surgery in the first place and know that you will need to find new activities in your life to make up for the void of not eating. Also be aware that you may become more emotional because now we're forced to deal with our problems instead of just eating them away. Part of me wishes it hadn't been so easy for me to have surgery and that I would've had a lot more prerequisites to prepare mentally for it all. That being said, I'm almost 5 months out and I'm still learning and dealing with the emotions, but seeing my body transform and knowing it's because I did something about it makes it all worthwhile...

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One of my biggest fears before being banded was that I would NOT lose weight... I have found that by replacing bad food with good food it has made the journey somewhat easier. Like instead of eating chips, I eat cucumber slices or sunflower seeds or I drink Water or iced tea or something in times when I am craving and know that I shouldn't eat.

As you get closer to your "sweet spot" your cravings should go away and then you are just eating the good stuff because that is about all you have room for anyway.

Bandster hell is HARD and it lasts for different lengths of time for everyone. For me it was the first 3-4 months and although I could have eaten whatever I wanted during that time, I didn't because again I was afraid that I wouldn't lose the weight and the surgery would have been a waste of time.

Always keep your goal in mind. Not the one the doctor has set for you but the one you have for yourself. None of us went under the knife just to have something to do. Remember your commitment to getting to a healthier and thinner lifestyle. Revel in the sense of accomplishment you feel when you see the inches and weight come off. Bask in the compliments from friends and family as they see the changes in you. And don't allow anyone to sabatoge you with negativity and doubt. And when you have a bad eating day, brush it off and start over the next day. There is no magical eating formula for the band. You just have to find what works for you and stick with it.

Good luck and you can do this!!! :D

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I am right there with you!! i was banded 3 weeks ago and cant seem to find my self discipline!!!! I lost 18 pounds on the 2 week pre op diet and only two since surgery and then the other day I was up 2. Its very frustrating!!! I am just hoping that when i get my first fill next week it will help.

Self-Sabotage, I'm the queen :( so with that being said.....how did you find and stick to new coping skills that didn't involve food? I've been an addict so long....How have you been successful long term w/ the band..I'm almost 3 months out...I know I'm not doing my best.

Anyone else in the sabotage boat?

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"Always keep your goal in mind. Not the one the doctor has set for you but the one you have for yourself. None of us went under the knife just to have something to do. Remember your commitment to getting to a healthier and thinner lifestyle. Revel in the sense of accomplishment you feel when you see the inches and weight come off. Bask in the compliments from friends and family as they see the changes in you. And don't allow anyone to sabatoge you with negativity and doubt. And when you have a bad eating day, brush it off and start over the next day. There is no magical eating formula for the band. You just have to find what works for you and stick with it."

Wow! dlynn said a mouthful, and all of it true. LOL on the "None of us went under the knife just to have something to do." Tooo funny.

Kelli, if you are in fact a food addict (as many of us are -- that would be me) you might consider therapy as others have, myself included. I started seeing an obesity specialist 8 months before my surgery. It helped a lot ... I still see her, but mostly to keep the other stresses in my life from taking me back down "the road to 'food is the solution to all my problems'. There are other avenues as well if therapy is not for you. Perhaps OA, or self help books, tapes, etc. Whatever you need to get you through this because YOU CAN DO THIS ... really you can.

It is my fevent belief that you will lose the weight when you are willing to do WHATEVER it takes. But, it must a program (whether it's your food plan or your exercise plan) that fits your life. Doctors can hand out a diet to all 50 or 100 of his patients ... but are they all alike? Absolutely NOT. So, it is up to you to take from him what will work in your life and modify the parts that don't fit quite as well.

We are banded now and we have real chance at changing our lives for the better and forever more. But it means taking that first step, then the second, then the third, etc. Remember, you are not in a race with anyone to lose weight. You can take as long as you want to lose it, or you can sit down, make a plan, and lose it in "x" months. This is all up to you. It is your journey.

All the best to you. YOU CAN DO THIS!

~Fran

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Let's face it, we're all food addicts or we wouldn't be in this boat! First of all, this really is a journey and it's kinda slow. I was banded on 1/11/11 and I figured that I would just start losing 1-2 lbs a week right off the bat. I didn't really grasp the whole "fill" thing and finding the right amount. I couldn't figure out why I wasn't losing tons of weight because I was eating considerably less than before. The scale didn't move a lot but the inches did. It's not as easy to self sabotage because the stuck feeling just isn't worth it for me. But, I've been in a mood or had pms or whatever and just wanted to stuff myself silly with food but simply couldn't do it because it hurts and I don't want to ruin my band. I've learned alot about myself this past few months but I still struggle with food issues. Just because you get the band doesn't mean "you're cured". I think that's what non-banded people think so they don't get it. I've only told my immediate family and 1 friend who lives in another state. I don't want people judging or watching my every move. This is the best thing I've ever done for myself but it's not easy. I think about food pretty much all of the time but I'm making exellent healthy choices and I'm eating less. I always said, "if I could just eat less and be happy" I know I could lose weight. I'm down about 30 lbs which I could have never done on my own. I also started doing Zumba 2 nights a week. I'm terribly out of shape from a cardivascular standpoint but I can do it! When you lose some weight, your clothes get smaller, people start to comment on how you look....the pieces just start falling into place and you want to do better. One day at a time......

Shelley

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Thank you all So much for responding! I really appreciate all your responses. If you haven't experienced Self-sabotage it really sounds VERY CRAZY!!!! I'm glad to hear others have worked through this process of sabotage and came out successful. This Lap-band is such a journey one day one step @ a time! So glad we have this forum to support, encourage, and share experiences on!

I have worked with a therapist before, worked some w/ OA....I called today where I had my surgery and they gave me contact info for 2 therapist they recommened.

Tomorrow is a new day!

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My whole life I did that to myself. I'm not experiencing it this time at all - what's different? Band + therapy.

Self-Sabotage, I'm the queen :( so with that being said.....how did you find and stick to new coping skills that didn't involve food? I've been an addict so long....How have you been successful long term w/ the band..I'm almost 3 months out...I know I'm not doing my best.

Anyone else in the sabotage boat?

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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