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So the fiance and I decided to have a date night. He took me to applebees and these local college cheerleaders walk in and set at the table beside us. way to make someone feel even more bad about themselves cuz my fiance starred at them the whole tim so not only did we not talk the whole time but I had to watch him stare at the cheerleaders. Like seriously wtf! I told him I don't appreciate how I'm the one who is always there for him thru everything and he doesn't even sleep with me but when a girl in a cheerleading outfit walks in the whole time he is thinking how he wants to sleep with her. And he responds saying she is attractive! Wow thank u for reminding me I let myself get fat and unattractive thank u it means so much! So wat have I done cried the rest of the night!

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Tyler,

From all of your posts it is pretty apparent this man does not love you. It doesn't even sound as if he likes you very much. Why are you letting him do this to you? What are you getting out of the relationship that you're willing to let him treat you in such a contemptible fashion?

Seriously...you want to marry this jerk? Marriage won't make it get better. Losing weight won't make it get better either. He sounds like an ass and you getting skinny won't change his personality.

Sorry...I don't usually use tough love, but wake up and smell the coffee before you end up married and have several kids by this dingo.

.

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You are going through a signficant, positive change in your life by getting banded. I think that this journey will be so much happier and healthier for you if you were with someone who supports you. I think you feel stuck, having been with this person possibly a long time, and certainly since you are engaged. But, you are never stuck! You are always in charge of your life and no one, I'm sure, would judge you if you took a break from this engagement to focus on yourself and your needs. He just doesn't seem kind to you based on this post. I hope it gets better, and wish you the best!!

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Please don't let him get to you because it may halt your success with the band! I am so glad I read this because it is confirming a dream I just had this morning! I was married to a total jerk that didn't even talk to me right or loved me. I was living in a glass house and he slept with his back turned from me and didn't want me to touch him while he slept because he said my body temp was to hot! I bet you are like why am I telling you a dream! It is because I want to be loved and married so bad and I guess the dream and reading your post is telling me that sometimes being married is not always good! I will be patient and wait on a good one and I hope you will do the same too! I don't know your whole story but sometimes those that wait get the best! I hope you feel better soon!

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TylerAshton,

I would suggest you both see a councilor to see if this relationship is worth it. My hubby and I are best friends but just after my surgery we had a big miss understanding. I think we both were stressed just after my surgrey. My husband and I have a strong love. We are both confident about our love and don't have to question it. I point out cute girls to him all the time because most of the waitresses are dressed for the part with their boobs in your face...! Best of luck!

K

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Tyler,

From all of your posts it is pretty apparent this man does not love you. It doesn't even sound as if he likes you very much. Why are you letting him do this to you? What are you getting out of the relationship that you're willing to let him treat you in such a contemptible fashion?

Seriously...you want to marry this jerk? Marriage won't make it get better. Losing weight won't make it get better either. He sounds like an ass and you getting skinny won't change his personality.

Sorry...I don't usually use tough love, but wake up and smell the coffee before you end up married and have several kids by this dingo.

.

Ditto! you hit the nail on the head! Dump the jerk, you can do better!

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So the fiance and I decided to have a date night. He took me to applebees and these local college cheerleaders walk in and set at the table beside us. way to make someone feel even more bad about themselves cuz my fiance starred at them the whole tim so not only did we not talk the whole time but I had to watch him stare at the cheerleaders. Like seriously wtf! I told him I don't appreciate how I'm the one who is always there for him thru everything and he doesn't even sleep with me but when a girl in a cheerleading outfit walks in the whole time he is thinking how he wants to sleep with her. And he responds saying she is attractive! Wow thank u for reminding me I let myself get fat and unattractive thank u it means so much! So wat have I done cried the rest of the night!

Ask yourself why he is your fiance and what you expect of a life married to him. Count me among those who say to get rid of him. The quicker the better. He does not sound like someone you can count on or who cares about you.

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I don't know your personal situation of course but based on previous posts by you it appears your boyfriend is a jerk. You are trying to better yourself and I'm willing to bet that the number one reason was to try to please him. If he doesn't want you as you are now then he doesn't deserve you when you are skinny and even hotter than you are now! I know it's a lot harder than it sounds, but you need to get out now before it becomes permanent and even harder to get out of it. In a year from now you'll be the girl walking in the restaurant he's gawking over but you'll have someone else that appreciates you and respects you! Let us know how it works out!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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