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Getting your 'head' in the game...



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Obviously I had the band because I have a weight problem. I was hoping several of you out there might be able to shed some light as to how you may have overcome or are working towards getting your mind to obey :blink:

I do not feel hungry in my belly but my mind isn't getting the message. When I wasn't banded or eating right I ate whenever. Now that my belly isn't hungry my mind is still saying 'hmmm we should eat something'. How do you turn that off? I've truly been the live to eat person not the eat to live, and I'd love to know how some are dealing with this. Life has always revolved around food, eating NOT because I was hungry but it was something to do.

Any words of wisdom here?

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Obviously I had the band because I have a weight problem. I was hoping several of you out there might be able to shed some light as to how you may have overcome or are working towards getting your mind to obey :blink:

I do not feel hungry in my belly but my mind isn't getting the message. When I wasn't banded or eating right I ate whenever. Now that my belly isn't hungry my mind is still saying 'hmmm we should eat something'. How do you turn that off? I've truly been the live to eat person not the eat to live, and I'd love to know how some are dealing with this. Life has always revolved around food, eating NOT because I was hungry but it was something to do.

Any words of wisdom here?

Yep, that was me too. My problems with my weight were never about hunger ... at least not physical hunger. My problem has always been head hunger, eating over emotion, just about ANY emotion. So, eight months before my surgery I started seeing a therapist, an obesity therapist. Had a session today, it was great!! Journaling works for some, others keep a food diary ... my therapist has had me do both. I won't tell you that things are always smooth sailing, but the head hunger is soooo much better than before. Now, when I want to eat but I know I am not hungry, I take a moment to think about what I am feeling and why I think food will make things better. Usually I am able to "talk myself down from the ledge" LOL But, I've been at this so long now that I just take the short cut: I ask myself if it's time to eat and if the answer is "no" then I think about how eating over an emotion will make my journey to my goal weight that much longer ... so I skip it. It took a while to get to the "short cut" point, but I got there. I have an example tonight. I thought about having a glass of wine or two. I don't drink often, but hey, it's Saturday night and I have a bottle in the fridge. Well, alcohol is just wasted calories and will wipe out much of the exercise I did this week so, I'm skipping it ... just not worth it. Today, it's not a big deal ... that wasn't always the case, denying myself something was just not an option in the past.

Hang in there, find ways to break the old habits. You can get a lot of good advice on this forum. Take what you can use and leave the rest behind.

All the best to you on your journey.

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Maybe you need a fill. food has been my everything, I really did enjoy every minute of it...after I hit that "sweet spot" it was more of a chore than a luxury. Don't get me wrong, I've shed quite a few tears looking at my plate 3/4 full and no longer being able to down it (thanksgiving is just not the same) but at the end of the day it doesn't compare to tossing my sweat pant out and wearing jeans and...wait for it....HEALS!!! I finally FEEL what skinny people are feeling when they say "if you're fat why not just stop eating as much?"...what they meant to say is that eating is not a habit for them so they don't get why it's yours...some even say that while smoking...lol..ignorance is has no weight limit!

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Anyone else?! I know there are more who have been through this or in it right now...

Thanks!:rolleyes:

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Marisa, I am having my very first fill on January 3rd. B)

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This is still something I'm fighting on a regular basis. This band has more of a mental component sometimes then I thoughtit would. Don't get me wrong... I love my band, and I am sooooooo glad I went through with it, but my head still tells me to eat, even when I'm not hungry.

This forum has been a life saver for me at night. Night time is the worst for me. Before I'd be in and out of the kitchen grazing. Now, I find something else to occupy my hands and mind. If I'm needing something to chew on, I have a piece of gum. I love the new extra mint chocolate chip ice cream flavor. If it's been over an hour since I ate, I will drink a bottle of Crystal Light. Gotta get the fluids in. Most of the time, if I have a bottle of Water or Crystal light by my side, I'm okay.

At night if I'm craving something sweet and the gum doesn't work, I have a cup of Swiss Miss diet hot chocolate (only 25 cals). Jello and sugar free Popsicles also help, as well as sugar free pudding. Sometimes in the afternoon a light cheese stick will help. I try not to give into the head hunger, but sometimes you have to do something to divert it. The gum and bottle of water/Crystal light have been my biggest helps. Hopefully this might help you too. :)

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I've been there allright and there's no easy answer. I can only tell you what I did and what I do. I realized I was medicating my emotional and physical state with food.

Bored, stressed, tired, excited, happy....I'd eat. I'd eat for all those reasons and addition to the regular times we are supposed to eat. I finally realized that I was attempting to numb my feelings with food. And for those times when there seemed to be no particular reason emotionally why I wanted to get up and find food...I realized I was medicating for the things I was missing in my life....intimacy, friendships, etc. I didn't know how to deal or even recognize some of those feelings so my mind just reached out for the easiest thing available that made me feel better, food. And thus a very bad habit was born.

It goes much deeper than that but you get the idea.

The lap band helps me control portions and some of the natural hunger so my mind is freed up to finally address those issues the way I should. It's a slow process but I'm learning. This is why they say that the lap band is a TOOL, it's not a cure all. We have to do the deep soul searching within ourselves and take a good hard look at some things about ourselves that might not be to pretty and overcome them.

So the next time your tummy isn't hungry but your brain is suggesting food see if you can sort of step outside of yourself for a second and see if there are any emotions, fears, anxieties, or things you are missing in your life that your sub-conscious is trying to mediate with food.

I thank you for this post because I realized that I was doing just what I'm talking about all day today. I sort of grazed all day. I was stressed about a day's worth of housework and my husband being in the way all day. I totally went over my calorie count and didn't exercise and all I seemed to want to do was grab a bite of food. Tomorrow I'll keep better track of what's going on in my head.

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Yep, that was me too. My problems with my weight were never about hunger ... at least not physical hunger. My problem has always been head hunger, eating over emotion, just about ANY emotion. So, eight months before my surgery I started seeing a therapist, an obesity therapist. Had a session today, it was great!! Journaling works for some, others keep a food diary ... my therapist has had me do both. I won't tell you that things are always smooth sailing, but the head hunger is soooo much better than before. Now, when I want to eat but I know I am not hungry, I take a moment to think about what I am feeling and why I think food will make things better. Usually I am able to "talk myself down from the ledge" LOL But, I've been at this so long now that I just take the short cut: I ask myself if it's time to eat and if the answer is "no" then I think about how eating over an emotion will make my journey to my goal weight that much longer ... so I skip it. It took a while to get to the "short cut" point, but I got there. I have an example tonight. I thought about having a glass of wine or two. I don't drink often, but hey, it's Saturday night and I have a bottle in the fridge. Well, alcohol is just wasted calories and will wipe out much of the exercise I did this week so, I'm skipping it ... just not worth it. Today, it's not a big deal ... that wasn't always the case, denying myself something was just not an option in the past.

Hang in there, find ways to break the old habits. You can get a lot of good advice on this forum. Take what you can use and leave the rest behind.

I like what you say about take what you can (or like) and leave the rest behind. I have found that works best for me on this site. Some of the comments are incredibly insightful and help me greatly while others just don't.

All the best to you on your journey.

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Thanks for the words... I will seriously be working on this as time goes by. :rolleyes:

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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