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If one more person tells me about the friend of a friend they know who had WLS and the person failed at it or gained it all back I will smack them.

I was thinking about it. Imagine walking up to someone who was diagnosed with cancer and they choose treatment. Then imagine someone walking up to them and discussing all the people they have ever heard of who died or "failed" their treatment process..

Next time I am at a wedding, I will walk up to the couple and spout divorce statistics. LOL

Just venting.....LOL

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Next time I am at a wedding, I will walk up to the couple and spout divorce statistics. LOL

Just venting.....LOL

LOL . that's funny!

I agree. I have heard all the stories about someone's second cousin's friend who knew someone that put back on all the weight ........ I usually just say, "oh, that's too bad." or "something must have gone wrong."

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I actually have a slightly different experience with this. I didn't tell anyone about my op.When I eventually told my one friend she was so impressed with me as she knows people that have had a band and not worked with it, so she knows that it isn't as easy as some people think. Apparently the one guy got banded but never went for fills and someone else she knows didn't lose weight as she just stuffed herself with junk food. So for me it has been a positive rather than a negative reaction.

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If one more person tells me about the friend of a friend they know who had WLS and the person failed at it or gained it all back I will smack them.

I was thinking about it. Imagine walking up to someone who was diagnosed with cancer and they choose treatment. Then imagine someone walking up to them and discussing all the people they have ever heard of who died or "failed" their treatment process..

Next time I am at a wedding, I will walk up to the couple and spout divorce statistics. LOL

Just venting.....LOL

Hi Tracy, my friend and I have been big ever since we've known each other. When I told her I was getting a band, she said "oh yeah, a woman at work had that done, but she put it all back on again and more besides..."

When she'd gone, my partner said "I can translate what she really meant, which was "oh no, now you'll be slim and I'll still be fat...."

I don't know what makes people tell failure stories, unless it's the only thing they've heard about LAP-BAND® so they reel it off their tongue.

Another friend also said to me "WHAT? you've agreed to have surgery on the 13th of the month? Unlucky or what??"

I think we just have to excuse them... in terms of thinking deeply about the whole procedure, we are miles and miles ahead of them.

The nicest responses are when people say "Wow! congratulations on making such a big life decision. I wish you well!!!"

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LOL!!

I here those stories too and wouldn't you know it's my overweight friends that are telling them. I think they are either scared or jealous or maybe even both.

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Heard that during RPM class yesterday. Two different people talking about people they know who had a band and didn't lose weight.. or lost it and regained.

And I raised my hands (both) and said.. I have a band. It does work if you work it. It's not a magic wand.

The nay-sayers just need to be educated. It does get tedious though.

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Heard that during RPM class yesterday. Two different people talking about people they know who had a band and didn't lose weight.. or lost it and regained.

And I raised my hands (both) and said.. I have a band. It does work if you work it. It's not a magic wand.

The nay-sayers just need to be educated. It does get tedious though.

you are right about that! I just read an article yesterday I think it was in Family Circle. Anyway this lady had gastric bypass and lost 80 pounds then gained it all back and then some. A couple of years later she decided she really was ready to lose weight so she started eating better and working out daily and lost it all. She said she just wasn't ready the first time around so she didn't use her surgery correctly.

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I so understand what you all are saying. I went through this same thing. Pulling into the hospital the day of my surgery my brother tells me " my mother in laws neighbor was buried just a week ago from the surgery." She set up infection.. ARE YOU SERIOUS!!! Telling me this as I pull into the hospital.

How insane do you have to be to say something like that.

I have heard alot of hate stories but really it just puts something in me to want to prove them all wrong and give them a personal success story to tell..

My BFF in all the world is still not supportive of me getting banded and says I will be no fun now. Wow... No fun because we wont be able to sit down and put away a whole large pizza a 2 liter and a 4 pack of reece's bp cups.. (which to my shame we have done, just 2 ladies) Really now, is that what made me fun,, food.. How sad, maybe she will have to learn to like me for me.. Just saying.

Hang in there, and just give them a success story to tell.

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I think we all experience this...and actually when I was having a lump removed from my neck a few years ago that they thought might be cancerous wouldn't you know someone mentioned someone they knew that had that and just died? Folks can be rather thoughtless sometimes.

As far as the failure stories - sometimes I think it definately stems from jealousy, but others I think it is because it is the only close experience that they have had with WLS surgery...and since it was negative thats all they know? When I got mine I did know of some folks who had lost some, but not all they wanted to, but they hadn't gained any back yet either.

I guess it is human nature to want knock them into next week when they are so unsupportive....but let me tell you, it has been fabulous to prove them wrong! I just nod and smile when I hear yet another failure story, tell them that yes it is not a cure all, and it is a LOT more work than folks think....and then my sucess tell the story. Maybe then they will at least have a positive example to tell with their negative ones!

Kim

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I am with you on that!!! They love failure because they are LAZY... can't deal with change!!! they want to say.. "well I will stay fat.. nothing works" Wayne Gretsky said " you will Fail at 100 percent of the shots you DON'T take.." We at least are taking a shot!

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Another friend also said to me "WHAT? you've agreed to have surgery on the 13th of the month? Unlucky or what??"

"

I had mine on FRIDAY THE 13th no less!!! All went well! :-)

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I have to admit that I was glad my surgery was Thursday 8/12. I would have been too embarrased to move it from Friday 13!

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The failure stories are good in a sense that they remind us that surgery is not a panacea.

The stories about people dying also help us realize that all surgery is major, no matter how simple it may seem.

On another note, you're in NYC, remind them of the people that get shot because they don't keep their big mouths shut. :cursing:

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Yep, people are amazing. My ex-SIL told me that putting something foreign in your body like the band was "unnatural". I said "you mean like an artificial heart or hip replacement that save life and limb?" ... she just started speaking to me again last Friday. LOL!!! We work in the same building in downtown L.A. and rarely run into each other. When I saw her on Friday, she didn't mention all the weight I've lost. LOL She was alway bigger than me, and now she is even bigger. Oh well.

I know a few people that had gastric bypass and gained back most if not all. But, that's not me and there is nothing that says that I have to follow in their footsteps. It is up to me alone to fail or succeed. What I put into it is what I will get out.

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. ~Herm Albright, quoted in Reader's Digest, June 1995

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I know exactly what you mean. I have had people that have had good success with gastric really look down on me because I chose lap band, including my doctor!

I finally figured out why my dr wanted me to have gastric bypass instead of banding - I finally got out of him that he didn't want me to be disappointed in my results because it took longer to get the weight off. Really with that?!?

He even told my mom in the recovery room that he isn't going to tell me I told you so.

Well, the stubborn person I am, there is no way in Hades that anyone is ever going to be able to say "I told you so"! Come heck or high Water I am getting ALL of this extra weight off of me.

Maybe they are using reverse psychology on me :cursing:

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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