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What has being fat kept you from doing?



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crossing my legs!

Wearing skirts because my legs rubbed together too much.

Sitting comfortably.

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I love this post. I have let my weight get in the way of so many things. Rock climbing, camping out (people might hear me snore), going out when I know there are people around who might see me and how fat I have become. I do not dance in public or ever really put myself out there.... god the list goes on and on- I have even convinced myself and those around me that I hate the beach- but I love the beach! And I love rides but I don't get on a lot of them because I think I won't fit- even when I read online that the ride is fat friendly I still don't get on because what if the online was wrong?

It's so messed up... and the funny thing is I have never been skinny so people know me as the fat chick- not this fat but really to most people fat is fat.

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Being fat has kept me from feeling like a woman. I've felt genderless for many years. I'm down 55lbs so far and I already feel more feminine and it shows in the way I carry myself, shop & dress. :thumbup:

I AM WOMAN, HEAR ME ROAR!!! LOL

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I'm sure this will be the same for so many people - being overweight meant I refused to let anyone take pictures of me.

Now looking back through old photos of my family, it almost looks like I wasn't a part of it. I was always behind the camera and have meticulously captured the lives of my husband and kids, but I look absent, even though I wasn't.

Now I don't mind having my picture taken at all, and my 20yo daughter recently commented that just in the last year alone, the Facebook photos of me jumped from just under 20 to over 400, and I went from being a ghost to being someone everyone could now see.

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First of all, I just want to say something to you ladies in here. I've looked at your profiles and some of you have pictures or your avatar pics. There are some really beautiful women in here. I know some of you may say you don't "feel" pretty, but I guarantee you that if I was single, I would be hitting on quite a few of you. I really hope that at some point soon when you look in the mirror you see the reality of how beautiful you are.

But back to the point of the thread, lol. I stopped myself from doing a lot of things in life because of my weight but a couple of years ago I made a decision to STOP holding myself back. My wife (who is tiny) has supported me in my Quest. So we started doing things together. We've done rock climbing, zip lining, bungee jumping, and white Water rafting.

And hopefully I'll get banded in December because next summer we want to try sky diving and para-sailing.

I'm not going to let anything hold me back. :thumbup:

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MountainMama- really awesome of you to get up there! Great story!

Like many of you already said, pretty much, I let my fat control my life. I used to be so outgoing and confident and the last year or two (i hit my heaviest) I shut down. I am just starting on this journey, 1 month so far, long way to go! But I am starting to control my fat, enough of the fat controlling me.

I stopped/won't participate now:

Going out to certain places

Meeting my boyfriends family

Meeting up with old friends

Going to amusement parks

Going hiking

Going white Water rafting

Going sky diving

Enjoying family events

Kinky/adventurous sex

Being silly

Being HAPPY...

I can't wait to get down another 15 pounds so I can start feeling more normal and then 30 pounds will be great and 60 pounds it'll be a whole new me!

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Back in my early twenties, I used to sing professionally. I was recruited to bands in different cities - Los Angeles and Seattle being the biggest and I've travelled all over the US and a bit in Canada singing. I've done everything from voiceover work to weddings to giant Amway convention in the Cincinnati Coliseum. Since I started gaining weight 10 years ago, you can count my performances on your fingers. I am just not confident enough to be up there with everyone staring at me, knowing it's my weight not my voice that is being focused upon. I've been invited and asked over the years, but I only made exceptions for good friends for weddings or funerals. I even stopped practicing, which at my peak I enjoyed doing for 1-2 hours each day. Now that I'm 50% to my goal of weight loss, I can feel my confidence coming back. If I'm in my car, I'm practicing, trying to gain my high register back. I've setup our back bedroom as a makeshift practice area. I'm soon going to accept a friend of a friend's offer to join him on some paid gigs. Not quite there yet, but getting closer. Lap Band has not only changed my life, it's saved it.

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This is an awesome post!

Being overweight has likely affected the success of my business, based on not wanting to be seen in the community.

I don't spend time with my daughter like I should.

My love life with my husband is not the way it once was.

I don't like go to weddings because I look like the old lady since I can't wear the sexy strapless dresses.

I wouldn't dare be caught having fun on a beach.

The list goes on and on..

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I'm an author and I had an offer from a publisher that wanted to publish one of my books, but they asked if I would be willing to participate in the publicity for the book - interviews, book signings, etc. I was horrified at the idea of having my morbibly obese self appear on TV. I told them I'd get back with them... and that was a year ago. Now that I'm losing the weight and looking and feeling better, I plan to call them back. But I fear that I may have missed my opportunity. :(

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That was a sweet post. I hope most of us gals read this :)

First of all, I just want to say something to you ladies in here. I've looked at your profiles and some of you have pictures or your avatar pics. There are some really beautiful women in here. I know some of you may say you don't "feel" pretty, but I guarantee you that if I was single, I would be hitting on quite a few of you. I really hope that at some point soon when you look in the mirror you see the reality of how beautiful you are.

But back to the point of the thread, lol. I stopped myself from doing a lot of things in life because of my weight but a couple of years ago I made a decision to STOP holding myself back. My wife (who is tiny) has supported me in my Quest. So we started doing things together. We've done rock climbing, zip lining, bungee jumping, and white Water rafting.

And hopefully I'll get banded in December because next summer we want to try sky diving and para-sailing.

I'm not going to let anything hold me back. :thumbup:

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OMG yes, good one. Add that to my list too.....

I have avoided going to see my husband at work and attending any of his office's social functions because I don't want them to know he has a fat wife :thumbup:

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Great topic. Reading all of the responses has brought tears to my eyes. I don't know why I didn't consider LapBand a long time ago. I feel like I have missed out on so much of my life - especially with my children. There are so many things that I would not/could not bring myself to do 65 lbs ago...

I only flew when I absolutely had to.

There were certain restaurants that I would not go to because I knew I could not fit in a booth.

Having my picture taken. I have so many pictures of my kids growing up and I am in so few of them.

Never went to any class reunions. I was always the perky little cheerleader and was so ashamed of what I had become.

Could not cross my legs.

Hated having to get my hair done because the cape never really fit around my neck, and my behind certainly didn't fit in the chair.

As much as I love fishing with my husband, I hated getting in the boat because there was this glaring little reminder that the weight capacity of the boat was 600 lbs, of which I was almost half.

Never ever went to office Christmas parties.

Never went to the beach, even though I absolutely love it

I would not dare wear a pair of shorts.

Never would be seen in front of another person while wearing a bathing suit.

I got the point that I would not even go to church because I felt like everyone was staring at me.

The list could go on and on. Pound by pound I am regaining my self confidence and I am loving the way I feel and look. It shows in the way that I dress, the way that I carry myself, the way that I think, and the look on my face. The Corporation that I work for did a write up in the quarterly news letter about safety. My plant manager and I are in the picture for the story. I saw it today for the first time and I was proud of myself for the first time in a long time.

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
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      1. Selina333

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