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Giving it up/turning it over



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Well I just wanted everybody to know that I am ready to stop beating a dead horse. I just got notice from my employer that they are not financially able to add the ryder that I would need from the insurance company in order to have the surgery. Initially Paramount HMO (my insurance company in Ohio) said they had an exclusion. Now I believe they do allow the surgery if the employer adds the ryder. So now it appears that my employer is the one with the exclusion. I haven't talked to HR one- on- one as I just got the notice yesterday. I plan to see what's up. Right now self pay is not an option. I had made a decision to turn this over to God and said I would accept whatever the answer was. I feel I have done everything in my power, so it appears that for now the answer is that the surgery is not for me. The good thing is that I met a wonderful therapist and addressed some issues. I will be seeing a Pulmonary Specialist and be having a sleep study as I believe I have sleep apeana. I am involved in aquatic exercise. I plan to focus on getting healthy, but I am done with the obsessive need to lose weight. I think leaving all of that in God's hands is the best thing. I will let Him guide my next steps. My philosophy will be "I can't. He can. I'll let Him."

Thanks for all your support. Best wishes to all no matter what stage of the process you are in. For some reason, I don't feel defeated. I feel my prayers were answered. This isn't the answer I wanted but I prayed for His will and not mine. Can't argue. If it is meant to be, it will happen, in His time and not mine.

I'll check in periodically.

sandy3

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Sandy,

That is a great perspective and I believe it wholeheartedly. However, I am sorry that you've fought the battle and still not won what you wanted. It may be that God has something else in mind for you at this time. Just as the band is, so is your fight for health a lifetime endeavor. Even without the useful tool of the band, you can implement the healthier choices in eating, exercise and Water intake. I know how hard it is, to change habits, but I assure you you CAN DO IT! Do things just like you would have had to do if banded. Learn to use dessert plates for your meals instead of dinner plates. Use cups instead of large glasses or instead of plates. Walk 5 minutes today, if you haven't been walking at all. Walk 10 next week. These are all things those of us who are banded had to do. Baby steps. CHANGE ONE THING!! No bread, no rice, no Pasta, no potatoes. It's all do-able, band or no band. I wish you better health and the continued blessings of God.

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May God bless you through whatever path he leads you!

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Best attitude for success I have heard in a long time. Please don't shy away from us, even though you may not be banded. I feel, and I am sure I am not alone, that this board is sooo much more about weight loss issues than anything else. Don't deny yourself the support and understanding I know we can provide here and don't deny us your wisdom and caring. We can never have too many people here, so please hang around, we need you and all the others like you.

I admire your faith and acceptance. They will carry you through the rough times, but you already know that.

Please don't try stopping the good fight either. Keep after people, it's the only way we are going to make changes in this world is by standing up for what is right.

Thank you for sharing and being such a positive insipiration for us all. You will succeed, I have no doubt.

Merry Christmas

Cindy

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Thank you all for your responses and support. What good advice leatha G. Maybe God felt I wasn't ready to use the band as a tool and work with it. Who knows. I only know that I am the only one who can make the healthy changes I need to make (w/his help of course.)

It would be too hard to stay away from this site. Too much info and support. Afraid I might miss something important. I do believe that a resolution will come from something I will read on this site. I don't plan to stop searching, just putting things on hold for now.

Trust me you will be the first to know if God changes his mind and let's me get banded.

Sandy

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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