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I am so discouraged and am at the breaking point. It's been 4 months since I got the band placed. I have lost 10 pounds and that was due to the healing process. I have had two fills and my doctor doesn't like to put too much Fluid in, so I have had no problems eating or drinking anything. I crave all the stuff that got me to the point that I am at and basically NOTHING has changed. I told my doctor that I didn't have any restriction and should I come in sooner than the recommended 2 month mark, if I were gaining or if I stalled. My doctor said stick to every 2 months. So here I am, 2 pounds more than I was the last time I saw him. I just want to cry! I'm so frustrated that I almost bought a pint of haagan daz butter pecan. I stopped myself, with a scoop of vanilla. Anyway, at this point my band isn't even a tool for me. On days that I feel strong I can still eat to capacity, so imagine how badly I do on days that I'm emotionally wrecked and weak and feeling no support.

Should I just give up? Am I a loser? I knew it wouldn't be easy, but geeze! I took two Bikram Yoga classes, 1 spinning class and 1 pilates class in a week and lost NOTHING!! I can't do this. There is just something wrong with my brain and my body. Am I destined to be obese? Am I? I don't even know what to ask. I just don't know what to do. I go for my 3rd fill on Sunday, and I'm embarassed to even go.

I feel so scared and so alone. :lol:

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I am so discouraged and am at the breaking point. It's been 4 months since I got the band placed. I have lost 10 pounds and that was due to the healing process. I have had two fills and my doctor doesn't like to put too much Fluid in, so I have had no problems eating or drinking anything. I crave all the stuff that got me to the point that I am at and basically NOTHING has changed. I told my doctor that I didn't have any restriction and should I come in sooner than the recommended 2 month mark, if I were gaining or if I stalled. My doctor said stick to every 2 months. So here I am, 2 pounds more than I was the last time I saw him. I just want to cry! I'm so frustrated that I almost bought a pint of haagan daz butter pecan. I stopped myself, with a scoop of vanilla. Anyway, at this point my band isn't even a tool for me. On days that I feel strong I can still eat to capacity, so imagine how badly I do on days that I'm emotionally wrecked and weak and feeling no support.

Should I just give up? Am I a loser? I knew it wouldn't be easy, but geeze! I took two Bikram Yoga classes, 1 spinning class and 1 pilates class in a week and lost NOTHING!! I can't do this. There is just something wrong with my brain and my body. Am I destined to be obese? Am I? I don't even know what to ask. I just don't know what to do. I go for my 3rd fill on Sunday, and I'm embarassed to even go.

I feel so scared and so alone. :mad:

you are not alone that is for sure we all have the same problem or we would not be on this site.

It is obvious your doc does NOT have his crap together. you are hungry because you do not have enough fill in your band. I mean if we could do this without the band we would not have needed it in the first place. I would see if there is another doc that will do your fills that UNDERSTANDS what the band is for and how it works he apparently is clue-less.

now quite a few seem to go 2-4 fills before you get restricted enough to feel it and not get hungry between meals. you did not say how much fill you have. It seems like from what I have seen so far it takes at least 5ml for most to get close to the sweet spot. I would see what he does this next time and ask how much fill you have total. if his answers are not meeting your needs tell him austa la Pasta and find someone that will.

You hang in there it is a process and a journey that takes time. Dont give up now you have a shot at being normal you need to run all the way with it!:lol:

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Hi there.. DONT GIVE UP!!! I would search around see if you can find a different doctor to do your fills. I had mine done in Phx. AZ maybe you could go over there to have them filled.. I have lost over 95 lbs and still going!!

It really does work! Keep up the good work and good spirits!:lol:

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I get it Ravyn. I could eat anything I wanted within the first week post op. What a failure I feel like, and I imagine you feel the same way. I have gained back about 8 pounds or so since my surgery almost 4 weeks ago. (huh...that's the 2 lbs per week they always spoke of after surgery, only in the wrong direction!!!!!)

I applaud you for working out. I unfortunately haven't been able to since surgery. First there was the "after surgery" requirements, and now I have a knee injury. I am only 4 weeks post op, but it has brought me to such a low, both physically and emotionally. However, I think we both know that our calorie intake is the most important part of our weight loss. Therefore, that's our downfall. At this point, we can't, or at least haven't, taken control of our intake.

With the 'no restriction' added to the mess, I don't even know how to cope. food is an addiction. I am so stressed over things in my life, and the calorie intake is where I turn. Here's what I think Ravyn. We need accountabiltiy. We need to state to someone else, what we ate, how we worked out, what we ate, how we felt today, what we ate, what we need, what we ate. Are you getting the gest of what I am saying. We need to do what is needed, or admit to someone, who is non judgemental, what we actually did that that day. We may have done everything right that day, or we may have done nothing right. I throw the gauntlet down. We'll start Monday. We'll be honest with each other. We'll be honest with ourselves. I'll tell you what I did wrong, you tell me what you did right (and vice versa). Together, in this out of body website, we'll be truthful for the first time in our lives about what we are actually doing on a day to day basis. I'd say for better or worse...but in actuality, it will be for better or best. Honesty among us can't hurt us at this point...it will be our backbone to achieve our goal. I think we are at the same point in this process...and I hope you accept this inviation, challenge if you will, to be the best we can be. Either way, I want the best for both of us. Good luck Ravyn....

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I agree that your doctor is not being helpfull. There are good doctors out there. Mine is great. He listens to me and then decides how much fill to do. Even though I have lost weight he still does a small fill. I have had restriction on and off since the third fill.

You also state you eat for emotional reasons. Unfortunately the band doesn't change whats going on in your head. You may want to check out overeaters anonymous (it's free). Or if you have insurance think about going in to see a therapist. Either one may help you find better ways of dealing with your emotions than overeating.

You can do this! Please don't give up.

Oh, great job excersising- keep that up for sure!

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Hang in there. You are not alone. It is sooo discouraging at times. I agree, your doc is not being helpful at all. I finally started losing well after fill #4. I just had my 5th this week. It takes a few to get good restriction. I envy your work out regime. I can not get that going....

Check in here a lot and keep doing what you are doing. Track your food and exercise so you can show a doctor. Then maybe they can point out suggestions.

Good Luck!

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Ravyn-- When I started exercising hard I gained 2 pounds the first week, but I kept at it and on the third week my body went OK, I get it now and started losing. Keep up the exercise it will help! Plus I find that when I am exercising that it helps me eat better, for instance, if I do my cross training in the morning I burn 400 calories, if my mouth starts wanting an ice cream later that day my brain tells me, if you eat that ice cream it will wipe out your effort for this morning and I will usually skip it.

When I was first banded I was not losing and I told my husband "I am doing everything right and I am not losing" and he told me "Um, no your not." Then I started journaling and it really helped me see exactly what was happening. I was then able to fix my eating one thing at a time. I would eat something and then when I put it into the computer, I would go "Holy crap! I had no idea that was so bad!" and then I would eliminate that from my foods. So instead of trying to change my whole way of doing things at once, I fixed one thing a week. On Sundays I would sit down and decide "What can I do next week better than I did this week?"

My motto is getting banded is a process not an event, it takes a while to work through the process and getting mad and frustrated is part of it to. Don't give up, keep trying, no one is destined to be fat. Get you fills no matter what. Seek the answers, look for your own path, its there, I promise.

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Stay encouraged. Have you ever ran a race and looked to your left and looked to your right and said...it the person to my left and to my right can continue to run...then so can I. We are here all running this race with you! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! We have to search deep within ourselves and find the strength not to give into our food call. You have it in you to do better...you just have to pull that out of you. No, it's not easy but you can do it. I believe you can do it...but you must believe you can do it!!! Don't faint today, don't give up. Find another doctor if you must but put it into every Fiber of your being that you are moving forward!!!!!! You are in my thoughts...let us all do this a day at a time....TOGETHER!!!!!!

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You are not a loser and you should not give up! Admittedly this process can be slow and frustrating at times, but you need to take control as others have said. Talk to your Dr. if you don't like the answer, look to see f you can find another Dr. who will listen to you.

Journal what you are eating and make the necessary changes. If you keep doing the right things you are bound to lose weight.

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I agree with the other posts...Look for another doctor to do your fills stat!! If possible, try to find a doctor who does it under flouroscopy. That way, they'll be able to see if you have proper restriction as they're doing it and put the appropriate amount of Fluid in.

I'm sorry to hear tha you're having a hard time but now that you have the band, you have to find a way to make it work for you. You have to make the band do what it was intended to do. Give you restriction so you can control the amount you eat!! So don't be discouraged and give up....YOU CAN'T DO THAT NOW!! You just have to get empowered and make that band work...after you find another doc!!

GOOD LUCK!!

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You are not alone!!! I feel like a slow loser, but I have realized that I haven't been following the program just right. I eat M&M's at least three times a week and not just the small bag, but the the king size that has two servings. I love homemade vanilla frozen yogurt. It only has 90 cal for one serving, but I eat two servings at a time. I must start making better choices and eating more Protein. I got this way because of poor choices and if I don't change I will not be successful with or without the band! I joined this site and sparkpeople hoping that the support and advice will help me. I hope that you will be successful also. I will make a goal starting right now to not eat any candy or icecream for 7 days! Will you join me? I need somebody working with me!

Edited by SF2009

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Hello!!

Oh boy do I hear you.

I have been banded for 18 months, and I have lost a total of 45 lbs. I lost 14 of that in the first 2 weeks. It is not easy, I can also eat anything and I really can eat a lot more than the 4 oz that is reccommended. Also, I can snack all day and never feel full. Nuts, cheese, ricecakes, even cake and Cookies if I wanted too.

I walk outside at least 2 miles 4-6 times a week. I try to do at least 20-30 min on the tread mill on the days i don;t walk outside. My legs are great, my stomach, not so great.

I do not know how to fix this. I am afraid I have streatched my stomach, and do not know how or if I can fix this.

I spoke to my Doctor about the snacking and his answer was "Only you can control that." BUT HOW???? I need help too!

I am so dissappointed in myself and I know that my husband is dissappointed, as we paid for this surgery ourself.

Any suggestions??Anyone??

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To those struggling - having the right fill makes ALL the difference in the world. Let's face it, if we were able to have a ton of will power, we wouldn't have gotten lapband, right?

It took me 4 fills until I was at the perfect spot (I even refused a fill yesterday because I know that I'm at my "sweet" spot) - and it was a LONG and frustrating road until then.

PLEASE be aggressive with your doctor - luckily, I go to a place that will do a fill every 4 weeks (once a month). Fills ARE what makes our bands work.

It's a hard process - and I don't know that I would recommend the band to everyone. It's a slow moving journey but I promise...if you hang in there, results WILL come.

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It's true that the right level of adjustment will make a world of difference.

But it's also true that no matter how well-adjusted your band, Haagen-Daz is going to go down just fine.

That means you really MUST start doing the things that support weight loss instead of sabotaging yourself.

Look, you're not where you want to be, fill-wise, yet. And many will tell you that you won't lose until you are.

But it's not true. You CAN choose to make appropriate food decisions and lose weight as you work toward restriction. It's hard, but it can be done.

It's not a decision you have to make, but you're unhappy with your progress now. What would happen if you were to really commit to eating the way you'll need to eat when you do have restriction? What do you have to lose?

Seeing success as you work toward restriction really might be the boost you need.

If nothing else, knock off the self-sabotage with stuff like ice cream. It's great that you stopped with a scoop instead of a pint--but even that is getting in the way of what you want to achieve.

Just because you CAN eat doesn't mean you MUST eat.

You can do it!

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This site is sooo helpful and so empowering!! When I have my moments ( I'm sure I will) I'm going to seek threads like this and take good advice, there's plenty on here!

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