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Slow the flip down! [A vent, sorry!]



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How hard is it for people to leave you the h*ll alone and let you eat in peace? I love my family dearly, but something has got to change...and soon! I make everyone's plate, mine last...always have. I have historically been disappointed that no one seems to care that I'm not eating yet when they dive in, so I'm usually last to finish. Now with the new slow mode its even worse. I'm sitting chewing, pausing - they work through their plates and leave...DH promptly starts cleaning the kitchen [a good thing, I know] and I find myself fighting to not "hurry up" so my dishes are ready for him. My DS4, who has no doubt asked for 6 things since I sat down finishes and starts hounding me for what's next, again push to rush....push to rush.....Darn it, this is hard enough to slow down, can I get a little help here??? In the end, I don't even eat until "satisfied" because my gut tightens over the stress of trying to make it all work.....Can anyone relate?

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Sounds like time for a "family meeting"! You need to voice this to your family so they can understand and help accomodate you. My hubby makes everyone wait until I am at the table before we say the blessing and then eat. When everyone is done, they take their plates in the kitchen, but I do the cleaning when I am done. Maybe tell hubby you will clean up your own stuff when you are done... or just let him go and sit and then get back up to do yours when you are done?

I have been putting everything my kids need from the fridge and kitchen they use.. down low, so they can go get it themselves and I am not bothered. My youngest is 5, she can get just about everyhting she needs because it is down low for her. Maybe a possibility for you?

Good luck! I know being a mommy can be fustrating! Happy Mothers Day!! :confused:

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Thanks for listening. You are right, a family meeting is in order. I found that posting was a good way to "get rid of it" so now i can have a rational conversation - yesterday, it wasn't going to happen. Thanks again for the support.:biggrin:

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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