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ATTENTION to those who are less than 3 months post-op and discouraged-READ HERE!!!



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I understand what you are saying, but my doctor didn't give me the best information as to what I should expect. I am not worried about the amount of lbs lost. What concerns me is that I'm craving foods that I didn't like before. I just posted a blog with questions on advice as to how to deal with this craving stuff. Any advice. I'm 4.5 weeks post op. I started feeling hungry yesterday. I ate 1/4c of raviolis tonight. I felt fine with no issues after, but I realize this was a stupid choice. Not exactly sure why I had to have those damn raviolis. They weren't even that good. I appreciate your post and would love any advice you may have on dealing with wanting food I can't have. Thanks!:smile:

I'm sorry, but I really get SO FRUSTRATED READING POST AFTER POSTs of new bandsters discouraged that they only lost X number of pounds since surgery!! Most are just a FEW WEEKS post-op and discouraged!

It infuriates me to no end that some doctor's don't tell their patients what to expect during "bandster hell" and these poor people are expecting "lightning in a bottle" and to lose weight immediately following surgery. So I decided to start a thread to help and educate them.

THE FIRST MONTH to 6 WEEKS IS FOR HEALING....NOT LOSING!!! Your body is recovering from major surgery and has fluids it is retaining. Your stomach has a shiny new plastic ring on it..what do you expect your body to do just dump 30lbs like that? Not gonna happen... Let it heal!

YOU DON'T LOSE WEIGHT SUBSTANTIALLY UNTIL YOU HAVE ADEQUATE RESTRICTION WHICH USUALLY TAKES 3-5 MONTHS!

DO NOT get DISCOURAGED or feel like a failure..this is NORMAL!!!

DO NOT COMPARE YOUR WEIGHT LOSS TO ANYONE ELSE!!! We are all DIFFERENT!! Some bigger, some smaller, some faster or slower..you will get discouraged if you focus on anyone but yourself!

PLEASE don't say...."I've only lost "X" lbs since surgery" and consider that discouraging. ANY weight lost is a success and pounds you are NOT GAINING!!!

FOCUS ON THE POSITIVE AND KEEP ON TRACK!!

I don't mean to be shouting or sound mean. I just think being direct is what is best sometimes--I hope this helps someone..anyone...from posting another "I'm discouraged" thread...:blink:

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Thanks for the awesome post. I thought I had done my research, but clearly, this was something I missed. I am 2.5 weeks post-op and have been stuck at the same weight for a week. I was wondering what I was doing wrong, and am comforted to know that I am right on track. I am a scale addict and wish I could just give it up and weight for my monthly doctor appt. to see what the numbers say. The good news is that despite the lack of number movement, I FEEL better and know that I am becoming more comfortable in my clothes. I don't crave food, feel satisfied with the nutrition I am getting (Protein, Protein, protein and no hunger!) and know what I am doing for myself and my body is a gift I've long deserved to give myself.

Thanks for the candor and insight - I really needed it today!

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Hi

I had my surgury on March 21, and I am on liquids till next wednesday. I have had considerable pain in the left shoulder, but that is dissapating. I have lost 13 pounds and was starting to feel disappointed, but after reading your blog I feel renewed and optimistic. Thank you for sharing it

truly offers a new outlook on the future results.

Rosief

I'm sorry, but I really get SO FRUSTRATED READING POST AFTER POSTs of new bandsters discouraged that they only lost X number of pounds since surgery!! Most are just a FEW WEEKS post-op and discouraged!

It infuriates me to no end that some doctor's don't tell their patients what to expect during "bandster hell" and these poor people are expecting "lightning in a bottle" and to lose weight immediately following surgery. So I decided to start a thread to help and educate them.

THE FIRST MONTH to 6 WEEKS IS FOR HEALING....NOT LOSING!!! Your body is recovering from major surgery and has fluids it is retaining. Your stomach has a shiny new plastic ring on it..what do you expect your body to do just dump 30lbs like that? Not gonna happen... Let it heal!

YOU DON'T LOSE WEIGHT SUBSTANTIALLY UNTIL YOU HAVE ADEQUATE RESTRICTION WHICH USUALLY TAKES 3-5 MONTHS!

DO NOT get DISCOURAGED or feel like a failure..this is NORMAL!!!

DO NOT COMPARE YOUR WEIGHT LOSS TO ANYONE ELSE!!! We are all DIFFERENT!! Some bigger, some smaller, some faster or slower..you will get discouraged if you focus on anyone but yourself!

PLEASE don't say...."I've only lost "X" lbs since surgery" and consider that discouraging. ANY weight lost is a success and pounds you are NOT GAINING!!!

FOCUS ON THE POSITIVE AND KEEP ON TRACK!!

I don't mean to be shouting or sound mean. I just think being direct is what is best sometimes--I hope this helps someone..anyone...from posting another "I'm discouraged" thread...:smile:

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Thank God for this post! It stopped me from posting an "I'm freaking out post!" I was just banded 2 weeks ago, and started to get my hunger back a few days ago. I have 3 weeks to go before my first band fill.

I was self-pay, so it is also a financial burden on top of all the usual how much have you lost questions. My husband is supportive, but he's afraid I went through all this just to fall back into bad habits. Even though I've eaten a few things I shouldn't have the last few days, it's still head and shoulders above what I used to eat. I'm trying to stay positive, and hope my first fill gives me some restriction.

I've lost 21 pounds so far, 15 before surgery, and I'm starting the old habit of weighing myself throughout the day...you know after I pee :smile: just to see if I dropped a pound. I know it's foolish to do that, so I'm going to follow some of your posts advice, and put the scale away for now.

This is a life-long change, and I needed the reality check posted on here. Thanks!!

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"Please don't monitor my progress, eating habits or weight loss. It's obvious by your comment that you have no idea what you're talking about or how harmful your comments can be to my ultimate success. I would appreciate no further input but would appreciate your support."

I really like this one. I told my mom that I gained 4 pounds (I now kick myself for saying that), and now she monitors what I eat. I'm only 3 weeks post-op and she'll say "Don't eat that because you gained 4 pounds, remember?" It's annoying. Everyone in my family is FAT! I annoys the hell out of me when a fat person tells me to how to diet.

GRRRR!

But I will try your suggestions. :smile:

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I understand what you are saying, but my doctor didn't give me the best information as to what I should expect. I am not worried about the amount of lbs lost. What concerns me is that I'm craving foods that I didn't like before. I just posted a blog with questions on advice as to how to deal with this craving stuff. Any advice. I'm 4.5 weeks post op. I started feeling hungry yesterday. I ate 1/4c of raviolis tonight. I felt fine with no issues after, but I realize this was a stupid choice. Not exactly sure why I had to have those damn raviolis. They weren't even that good. I appreciate your post and would love any advice you may have on dealing with wanting food I can't have. Thanks!:smile:
First of all, don't beat yourself up about eating a few "no no" foods now and then..we are all human..and this is..again..normal.

I am NOT saying eat whatever you want and don't eat healthy, what I'm saying is that you know what to eat, so eat it the vast majority of the time. If you eat something you shouldn't..don't fret..just REALIZE what you did, change the behavior and move on.

It is SO easy to say.."well, I already messed up so why not eat a dozen more donuts and whatever else." DON'T DO IT!!

Just go back to the foods you are suppose to be eating and file the "no no" incident to memory and try not to repeat.

What helps me is the have quick access Protein meals around. I really like the Hormel fresh meals (chicken breasts, turkey stroganoff, etc. in the meat dept. at Super Wal-Mart). They are quick, low calorie, low fat and high Protein. It is important to have items available quickly so that you can easily choose good over bad.

I keep my "cheat" foods as healthy and proportionate as possible as well. SmartFood popcorn comes in 100 calorie packs. When I REALLY feel like potato chips or real buttered popcorn, I grab a little bag of this instead. The best choice?? NO! Bbut CERTAINLY better than a bucket of buttered popcorn or a half bag of chips!

I also keep the pre-packaged apples slices packs around at all times. This and a little bit of Peanut Butter often cure my "sweet tooth." When this doesn't cut it, I have a few of the "trick or treat" sized Kit Kats that I can grab in case of emergencies. Again, the best choice? NO! do I eat these every day or even every week? NO! But when that chocolate demon gets in my head, it is ceratinly better to have 2 bites rather than a king size.

There are all sorts of demons and temptations we have to overcome EVERY DAY!! How I choose to deal with them might be TOTALLY opposite of someone else..but this is what works for me. I know many bandsters that would totally FREAK OUT if I told them (gasp) I have chocolate a few times a month. They might accuse me of not following the rules and be shocked. Truth is, it would be FANTASTIC if I could give up chocolate 100%..but I cannot..so I minimize the temptation the best I can. For me I could NEVER give up chocolate 100% so why would I set an unrealistic expectation? I personally don't..but I do give it up 90% of the time..which IS attainable for me.

I think what is most important is to focus on your eating habits, what you can do well (maybe walking) and what you do poorly (for me giving up chocolage 100%) and make it work the best it can for you personally.

A friend of mind that also has the lap-band is shocked that I drink a diet soda a day or two here or there...you would think I had another head growing out of my ass..lol.

My response is...maybe not the best choice, but I do it in moderation and it works for me.

If you "fall off the wagon" learn from it, grow from it and keep fighting. Don't beat yourself up and feel horrible. You're human and it will surely happen again.

It's not how we fall that defines us...it's how we get back up!

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Thank you for posting this thread. I had an inkling to do it but didn't feel like getting yelled at. I was so sick of seeing the "I just had surgery 2 days ago - why haven't I lost weight" threads. I hinted around on another thread. Maybe you should post this over in the Pre-Op board? I think it is my fault for not doing more research on how long this weight loss would take and not asking the correct question to the doctor.

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VERY GOOD POST!!!!

........"BANDSTER HELL".........!!!!! SPOT ON.

I was banded in January lost a lot pre and post op and started putting it all back on since.

Was given loads of preop advice but no postop and have had to do all my learning on this site...a lot of very experienced bandsters here, i must take my hat off to them!! otherwise i would still be in the dark.

Because i did not see instant results i started warring with hospital and staff....saying things like i want this thing taken out.....i deliberately did not eat correctly as i was constantly trying to test band by eating Kentucky drinking loads of wine etc....demanding where is this restriction?? i have a duff band!! suing etc....haha

Then after them calming me down at 2nd fill ( up to 6cc) and telling me it will come be patient...i deliberately went out and pigged out in a temper tantrum!!

Then i was eating as per norm about a week ago and it started working i could not hold my food down and was sick......!!!

I am now starting to have problems with bread and all the symptoms are starting to kick in like having to chew food longer in order to get it down.

I do not have proper restriction but i feel i am on the verge and the next fill i feel will do it.

Now all clinics etc always try to hammer home diet and never tell you about x amount of fills to restriction because they are right diet is the most important.

However if i knew more about postop Bandster hell, restriction etc i would have made more of an effort with diet rather than giving up and going back to Kentucky etc because i thought it was not working........i would have been ahead rather than having to start now with my weight loss......however as stated everyone is different!!.....and i should have had more faith.

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Thank you for posting this thread. I had an inkling to do it but didn't feel like getting yelled at. I was so sick of seeing the "I just had surgery 2 days ago - why haven't I lost weight" threads. I hinted around on another thread. Maybe you should post this over in the Pre-Op board? I think it is my fault for not doing more research on how long this weight loss would take and not asking the correct question to the doctor.

I got the idea to post this thread from you probably...lol. I just got very tired of typing the same response over and over.

I think your idea of posting this on the Pre-Op board is an EXCELLENT Idea! I think I might have to tweak it a little for those pre-op.

I cannot believe how many people get incorrect or no information on this process, and I too would get frustrated. But people need to do research on their own as well and don't just take the Dr's word for it and let them cut you open. I'm surprised how many people do just that.

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but when you look up and you realize you haven't eaten a decent meal in two or three months it's only natural that you are going to feel angry that you haven't loss much weight.

I understand your frustration--truly, I do.

But the above leapt out at me. Why haven't you had a "decent meal" in two or three months? Are you continuing to define "decent" by the yardstick you used preoperatively?

If so, it's time to reframe. Find ways to make the foods that are on your plan into lovely meals.

You are going to be dissatisfied forever if you cannot get past this hurdle. Eating is different, now and forever.

This does not mean you cannot have indulgences. It means that most of the time, you will need to eat within certain parameters.

You can choose to view it as punishment (as "never having a decent meal"), or you can find ways to make it pleasant and fulfilling. It's entirely in your hands.

Coloradobanding--great post.

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Tell me about it Illuminationlady! This guy has me on an Atkins type diet. Less than 30 carbs a day, high Protein and no sugar. No pastas, fruits, etc., due to carbs. My Internist says he is crazy
My doctor has a similar regimen, and the expectation that it will be adhered to during bandster hell. My PCP is 100% supportive of it, and I've been just about 100% compliant. At 3.5 months out, I'm not at 50 pounds down (my doctor never voiced an expectation of that sort), but I've lost 42. So, I'm going to go out on a limb and say, "Give it your best shot."

I really don't think it's nuts. I don't believe maintaining or gaining during bandster hell are a given.

I certainly understand accepting our bodies' needs for TLC and healing. But I don't believe that the fact that we can eat dictates that we must.

This is the LAST time you are going to have to suffer hunger in the name of weight loss. You now have a tool that will remove that aspect of the struggle. But during the time you wait for the tool to become effective, you can adhere to your doctor's plan and lose weight, if you choose to do so.

It's difficult, but it sure feels good to see the weight come off.

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I'm glad you posted this. I was banded March 31st and since I've lost about 20 pounds. I was discouraged at first, but I haven't had my first fill yet. I am greatful for this new journey and am taking it one day at a time but it's the best decision I've ever made in my life.

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This aspect wasn't discussed much either by my surgeon's practice and it's only since I started getting fills(surgery 3/9; 2nd fill 4/28 - 4cc in an 11cc band) and expressing my distress at "only" losing 10 pounds that the PA's who do the fill are telling me that it takes time to get to the "green zone"...as for any feedback from the doc who did my procedure - I won't see him again unless there's a physical problem with the band - his surgery schedule is too busy...

Now here's something that did freak me out. Went to a support group at my doc's practice. A lot of the folks there were a year plus out and had "only" lost 50 pounds. All were still "obese" and most were quite unhappy at their "failure"(their words not mine). All the presenters could give them for suggestions was the same old and a push to go back on Medifast. I started getting that sweaty anxiety feeling like WTF - why did I do this if I'm going to continue to be hungry and will "only" lose 50 pounds?? Since I lost 30 on my own prior to GB and 10 since, that means if I lose another 10, I'll have paid $1,200 for each post GB pound lost! Suddenly Weight Watchers looks like a bargain! I calmed myself down - I met with my NUT who worked out any eating plan for me and I've accepted that I am only 6 weeks out and need to Chillax! :thumbup:

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Thank you for this post.

I know in my mind that this is a process and soon I will get to that sweet spot.

I had my third fill and am still not there, dont think I am even close.

I am discouraged.

I need to keep telling myself it will get better.

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I believe attitude is everything. Not just with the band but with life in general.. Everyone please keep in mind that our perception of time gets screwed up when we get the band. It is sort of like when we are under 10 years old and we can't stand it until we are another year older. We measure our years in fractions!!! "I am 4 1/2 years old. We are never 36 1/2 years old. The minute we get banded, we want to be skinny tomorrow. When we get told we need to wait to get to restriction, we are like the 4 year old. We want it now. Granted this period of time is much longer for some than others, but getting negative about it, only makes it worse. It is extremely important to stay positive and to keep looking for ways to make it work, instead of ways to thwart our progress!! It will work. Do your part and try not to get too caught up in the time thing.... Hugs to all......

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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