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What was your "That's it" Moment?



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I have a two-year-old, and there are some things I can't do with him because of my weight and related back pain. He prefers my mother or my husband who can do those things with him. That really hurts. I knew I really needed to lose the weight. I'd had doctors recommend surgery, but I never even considered it because I'm extremely squeamish.

My "that's it" moment: I decided to give the diet another try. Then I wondered what would make this time any different from all the other times I'd tried. I remembered that lovely saying: The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting to get a different result. And even if I did lose the weight, I'd be fighting my hunger forever, and I knew I couldn't live that way. I'd tried everything else, and surgery was all that was left. If I was really serious about losing weight, I'd have to get over this fear of surgery. And the more I heard about the surgery, the more I wanted it. It's like someone told me I could be 20 again. I can't wait to have my life back and be able to do things without pain! Two days post-op and I'm optimistic.

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I've wanted the surgery from the moment I learned about it, but I never had the type of insurance where I could afford it... I began seriously researching the band again in 7/09 when I went to my doctor and learned that I had reached over 300lbs again (after only weighing 240 the previous year). Then, in 12/09, things just started coming together:

1) my employer changed our medical insurance to a policy where everything is covered at 100% after you pay the $1,000 deductible

2) I slipped while walking down my driving after a snowfall and dislocated my knee so badly that I was told I would need surgery (good reason to lose weight)

3) I realized that between the x-ray and MRI on my knee, I had almost spent my deductible, so I might as well spend the next 11 months getting as many medical procedures completed as possible!

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I started looking at WLS 14 years ago when I was 39. I was my highest weight ever (330) and had a 4 year old I had difficulty keeping up with. At the time though, they were only doing gastric bypass and I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

Six years later, they approved the Lap Band in this country and once again I investigated, but my insurance company had all of these co-morbidities you had to have in order for them to pay for the surgery. At that time, it didn't matter that I was 330 pounds. All they cared about was the fact that I had no co-morbidities to go along with it.

That did motivate me to go back on Atkins though and lose 70 pounds...which I kept off...but I just couldn't seem to stay on it longer and lose everything.

So, flash forward another 8 years and now I have diabetes, sleep apnea and joint problems directly related to the excess weight. No cholesterol problems or heart related problems, thank God, but I knew it was only a matter of time. I realized that I'm not getting any younger and my youth is being stolen by my 'fat', so I went back to the same clinic, figuring now I had the necessary conditions so insurance would pay...and they did.

.

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Again, thanks for sharing all your stories. I am waiting til the day I can use the normal BP cuff at the doctor. My arms will be the last place to see a change, so that will be "It" for me. I joined curves years ago and after 6months of going faithfully 6x a week I lost no inches, gained weight and my arms grew 3 flabby inches each and I have never lost it no matter how much I lose. I will be getting the bat wing surgery when all is said and done, i am not doing all this suffering, growing and changing to still wear 3/4 sleeves in July!

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I had several mini moments before "That Moment" happened.

- seeing the doctor write obese on my medical records then eventually writing morbidly obese

- my health started to decline at a rapid rate and having to purchase a daily pill box to keep track of my meds

- seeing pictures of myself

- unable to walk without panting

- looking at all the cute clothes in the store, then going to the plus size to buy. Why do plus sizes always look like clown clothes?

- losing weight, a lot of weight, only to gain it back and then some

Then "That Moment" happened. I had a first consult with my bariatric surgeon. He calculated the number of years I have left to live if I continued to be morbidly obese. My life expectancy would be cut in half!!! That is when I chose to live.

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I'm a teacher. I teach 1st grade. Love the little ones! And along with the little ones, you get to know the parents very well. I had one mother (I had taught her 2 daughters) come up to me and bluntly said "You're getting big! You don't look healthy". At first, I was SOOOOO mad! How dare she say something like that. Then by the time I got home, I was crying. A big 300 lb. man crying!!! That was my moment. I got banded on 3/1 and the pounds are coming off. I went up to that same parent to say hello. Her eyes got big and she gave me a big hug! She was so happy for me. She later told me that the only reason she said what she said was because she (and her daughters) adored me and wanted me to be happy. All is forgiven! :-)

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Mine was my 50th birthday. Been heavy all my life and tried not to let it stop me, but when I look around at elderly people, they aren't huge. My husbands family are extremely long-lived, and I'm not ready to leave him and the kids at a youngish age. I'd like to live into my 80's, not my 50's!

Sharon in Alaska

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my "moment" was a combination of moments like others have mentioned. like drasan said... i couldn't walk anywhere without panting. especially going up stairs. i was so put out with sounding like i had just done a marathon when i'd only walked from the parking lot into the store! seeing myself in pictures and thinking "omg. look how huge i am!!! when did i get that big? am i really that big?". realizing that i didn't comfortably fit in clothes from my favorite store (old navy) anymore and that the plus size stores were my only options now. hearing my knees pop when i walk. having trouble tying my shoes or reaching over in my car to get something. all the "little" things just added up and then the realization that my insurance would pay for it 100% and what a blessing that was. well... i couldn't just ignore the issues or the opportunity for change. so i went for it!

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I went to Rochesters Big and Tall and I barley fit in their largest suit, size 60 coat. When you out grow the fattest clothes at the fat store...it is time.

Shaun

It was not my "That's it" moment but I had the same problem, size 60 suit coat that kinda buttoned. I guess my "That's it" moment was when I started having to use a "extension" to wipe my own ass. God that was embarrassing to admit. Oh well that was 118lbs ago, anyone need a size 60 suit coat?:smile:

Jerry

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I didn't really have an AHA! moment. I'd struggled with weight for most of the time since my kids were born--and it was just time. I was just...ready. I was tired of paring down to impossible levels to lose, and almost-as-impossible levels to maintain. I needed help.

I still have to pare down to ridiculously low calorie levels. It's just the way my body is. The band makes it possible to sustain this long-term.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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