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Worried. What will happen?



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I have been having a bit of trouble trying to wrap my head around something.

It's to do with trying for a baby. My usband and I are planning on trying for a baby this year (starting soon) and although I am so excited and happy about the potential to start our family I feel like I'm so stressed and worried.

Is it likely that I will regain all the weight I have lost so far and get back all the back pain that has gone?

Will I be strong enough to deal with everything that is to come?

Mostly I am terrified that all the good that I have done by losing the last 25kgs and the hard work I'm doing to try to strengthen my body and make sure that those joint problems and my back pains don't take over my life as they used to.

What happens if my body just goes back to being the problem that it was before and as a result our little baby suffers - that I can't do all I need to do to keep him/her healthy and happy and can't be the active mum that I have been longing to be? I feel like I would be letting down our little one from the beginning.

I would be grateful for any advice!!

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The great thing about banding is that it is compatible with later pregnancy.

Like all pregnant women, you will need to be careful to get proper nutrition. Your surgeon and OB can work together to determine the calorie level you require, and your band can be adjusted accordingly.

YES, you probably WILL have back pain---it's a common occurrence during pregnancy, when body mechanics shift tremendously. But it's TEMPORARY---as will be the weight gain. After all, you WILL have the band still, and will be able to lose the modest amount of weight recommended as a pregnancy gain quite easily.

We ALL worry about...well, everything!...when it comes to pregnancy. But this really is one worry you can put to rest. Please don't let your pregnancy be soured by weight ruminations---so many of us (even pre-banding) focused far, far too much on THAT, and far too little on the absolute miracle going on in our bodies!

PS-Your worst case scenario seems to be regaining your weight thereby harming your baby for life. My kids have had an overweight mom for a good deal of their lives. Know what? They were gobsmacked when I told them I was having WLS. It had never occurred to them that there was anything about me that required changing.

Really, having an overweight mom does NOT RUIN KIDS' LIVES.

Edited by BetsyB

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Thank you for your post Betsy :confused:

Your words have put my mind at rest for certain and I plan to be proactive and if there are things worrying me about my back particularly (I have been being treated for lower back problems but the weight loss has made a big difference) I can talk to the doctor and they can tell me the best plan of action. My friend who had similar problems through pregnancy suggested a strong reinforcing band around that area that you can get at the physio which would really help. In the meantime keeping up the exercise and those 'inner core' strengthening stretches will hopefully help.

So maybe I will put on a little bit of weight - that's ok as long as I can still hold myself upright and have times of relief from pain. I just want to be the best mum I can be (probably something every single new mum will want) - so I will do all that I can.

And you are right it is an absolute miracle that you create a child and help him/her grow those first nine months. I'm looking forward to it very much :smile2: I have watched two of my sisters-in-law and one sister go through pregnancy and witnessed c-section recovery, babies who won't turn, a very large baby, long labour, problems with breastfeeding, teething, money worries . . . all of these stressful parts of the new baby's life but I've also seen so many wonderful things that make me realise how much I really want to get there too :eek:

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I understand the back pain concerns completely--I have horrible back issues. I was told that they'd be hugely compounded by pregnancy and was VERY pleasantly surprised that the hormones of pregnancy and breastfeeding vastly improved my pain! If I could have, I would have stayed pregnant forever, it felt so much better!

There are a LOT of options for back support for pregnant women--your doc will have good recommendations.

You'll be a great mom :confused:

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Betsy:

I was the "post band" representative at my surgeons' lapband seminar recently. He asks someone who's been successful with their band to be available to answer questions when he's speaking with potential newbies. Last month one of the perspective bandsters asked about pregnancy. My surgeon said that he recommends either getting pregnant first, or getting pregnant about a year after reaching goal. I think it would be very hard to be a newbie bandster while being pregnant. Also, it may be hard to get the proper nutrition unless you're completely unfilled.

Best wishes to you newbie bandster.

Sue

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Thanks, Sue, for the good wishes :thumbup:

My surgeon is adamant about waiting at least a year, as well. Fortunately, I'm past my baby-making years--my "baby" is now 13!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

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