Yvette1026

Some notes from an ex-benefits administrator 1.) your surgery IS an acceptable use of your STD (so is having a cold for more than 7 days etc...) any medical reason to be off work, that you have a signed dr's excuse for. 2.) Most STD plans require a 7 day waiting period, so be prepared to have a week's worth of PTO to cover that week, unless you pay extra for the "no wait" that some insurances offer. In some cases they require 14 days of a waiting period but 7 is most common. 3.) She pays for her insurance, and it's there for her use. If she has a medical excuse for 6 weeks, Metlife will allow her their pre-determined allotted time to be off work. And anything further would require a treatment plan and office notes. Even if the dr says 6 weeks he/she will be required to fill out paperwork explaining why the PT requires a longer than normal recovery time. And although many of you don't agree with her methods and she may not have properly presented this; she's entitled to use her STD and she actually does have a reason to be off work if it's approved by her doctor and if you read between the lines of what she wrote you'll see it, if you're trained in it. She's burnt out. Surgery (although elective) is a major life event and stressor, with what most would already consider a very full life load (ft job and school) the added stress of life changing surgery and the adjustment period required gives her enough of a reason to be off work for a few weeks. All of this was more than likely recognized by her DR, although not a mental health expert, and he provided her with the excused absence. Everyone is entitled to their thoughts and opinions on the matter, but unless you can deal and speak to the facts and truth of the situation or there's an MD at the end of your name all of these opinions are for the most part invalid and just pixels on a screen. Just my 2 cents anyways... Happy New Year all and to the poster hope you get the assistance you need, if you need it :biggrin:

@Melinco - I totally understand your frustration. I had the same situation with my mother, she told EVERYONE, even when I wasn't 100% sure if I was doing it and asked her not to tell. I told her I'm only telling her, I didn't want everyone to know and she could tell my sister that's it. She decided to tell my sister in front of her other sister (who is not related to me or my mom.) Then she tells my brother, who then tells his brother (again not related to me or my mom) so now my siblings and their siblings know (which is why i told my mom NOT to say anything) and the brother's wife leave my mom an open message on her facebook about my surgery. I was SO mad, I still am... Then I confronted my brother about it and he's like oh man you know we were just sittin' around and it came up. Ummm yeah because you all have nothing better to do than talk about me?!?!?!??!?! They all want to say oh c'mon it's family.. ummm no it's not.. I'm not related to them, I see them once or twice a year, if even that much. There's people alot closer to me that I haven't told and the bottom line is they're wrong for telling my business, especially when they were asked not to. The one thing I asked was for people to respect my privacy, and of all people my mother violated it and then it spread like wild fire. I actually wasn't going to tell her I had it done, but since I live alone, etc.. I kinda needed to. It's all about people not respecting your privacy and more importantly your CHOICE. I get very upset when someone takes my choice from me, especially on something that isn't theirs to share or really be a part of.

Interesting topic...I sit on the fence with this and teeter back and forth. I tell certain people and straight out lied to another group of people, which hurt me to do, because I'm not a liar. But even with them I said "I've reconsidered having surgery" which was true, I reconsidered for a moment, then reconsidered back to having it. I didn't feel the need to advertise either way. My fear is not telling people or working out (I joined a gym and lost 140+lbs by sweating it off 5 years prior to surgery) it's that I've learned in this life that not everyone needs a front row ticket to your life, and VIP only holds so many. I do a lot of public work, traveling, speaking, etc... I don't need or want the hassle or the headache of comments, special prep, etc... from people who "think" they're helping. The majority of people don't realize this isn't a "diet" you can eat what you want, just not as much. But as soon as people find out they become supportive by becoming the diet police. "You can't eat that", "You better not eat that", etc... I went through that recently with my mother of all people as she proceeded to tell me all weekend what I could and couldn't eat. I finally had enough and told her, I can eat what I want, explained WHY I could and HOW I could. I then explained everything to her. Which I had done many times before but she was SO against the surgery she wasn't hearing me. Educating her to the point, she's now considering the lapband for herself. If I'm asked I'll tell as there's no shame in my game, but if it's not someone in the front row of my life, there's no point in advising them of the situation. The same as I wouldn't advise them about any other medical condition or treatment I'm undergoing.

I would be a lil' concerned with anyone who doesn't take a moment to second guess major surgery and the implanting of a device into their body. It's perfectly normal, especially as you've been successful losing prior to the band. I did the same just before mine, as I lost 32lbs in just 3 weeks prior to getting it. As someone who's lost 140+lbs on my own, and kept the majority of it off, people didn't understand WHY I was doing this, especially after another astonishing weight loss just before surgery. It's simple - the up and down HAS TO STOP. You'll be given a tool to help aid you in your losing, making it omni present in your mind of what you can and can't eat, how much to etc, etc... If you're like me, all it takes is a bad few days and you're off the diet or "lifestyle change" bandwagon. There's no real option for that here, unless you have self-esteem issues and will purposely sabotage yourself and not lose weight (Sorry for those of you who gained with your lapband but barring any medical issues that's what happened.) but you don't strike me as the type. You seem like the type to do well in everything you do. I took a week and thought it all out, did I REALLY want to do this??? Yes I did, and at a day shy of 2 weeks post-op I am SO glad I did.

oh and that was an intention "weight" pun instead of wait just saying... forgot to quote it lol

This is why I don't own a scale and have told myself I will ONLY weigh at my dr's office on my bi-weekly visits (minus a time or two of jumping on the gym scale). It's been soooo tempting to jump on the scale and see, but my appointment is Tuesday, I can weight til then. I know my face is thinner and my clothes are loser, one of my bras just literally slides right off me as I'm wearing it.. I was walking around the grocery store yesterday trying to keep my bra on and my jeans up.. I had a flash of me standing there with in my t-shirt and panties, wearing my bra like a mini-skirt with my jeans around my knees if I didn't hurry up and get outta there lol. You have the right attitude for this and your surgeon seems to have prepared you for everything!

Congratulations! I know it feels great! Keep it up!

Orbitz maui melon all day, every day... I don't swallow it, it's sugar free and it's been my long standing addiction.

I think it's the best thing you can do for yourself really. It's normal to be scared and have questions. I researched this for 5 years before I FINALLY decided to do it. I'm 2 weeks post-op on Friday and I can already tell you I love love love what I've done for myself. The #1 thing I can tell you is not to compare yourself to others. The one thing I've noticed about this journey is we may all be taking the same trip, but we all have our own road to get there. Some people can eat bread, some can't, some get sick, some are perfectly healthy. It's all about YOU and YOUR body. As for the sugar issue there's lots of great natural sweeteners out there like Agave nectar, that you can easily replace for sugar. It's not an "artificial sweetener" like sweet n' low or equal it's 100% pure, natural and in most cases organic. Besides 100% sugar free isn't a necessity after surgery, I mean it is for the first 4 weeks, and suggested while you're losing but it's not "required". Every person and every surgeon is different. Some surgeons say you can eat after the first 48 hrs, some say you have to wait 4 weeks. It really just depends. If in your second month you have a slice of cake or pie, it's not going to undo all the work you've done.. However, that's if you're able to tolerate sweets like cake or pie at all after surgery. Again, everyone is different. So far I've had no problem eating anything. I have restriction and am almost never hungry. I remind myself to eat, and I haven't weighed myself since surgery but my clothes are literally falling off me and everyone keeps commenting on how much weight I've lost. (People who don't know I had the surgery) so it's been great! If you're lucky enough to be blessed to be in a situation where you can get the surgery done, I definitely say go for it, just be sure you do your own research and make sure it's right for you. Good luck!

Nevermind, found my own answer...They're called restaurant cards or special menu requests... they're all over the internet for you to be able to print them out. No wonder my friend was saying they were having such a hard time with them in vegas and that places weren't taking them because they were getting so many fakes. Restaurant Card Bariatric Surgery RestaurantCard Interesting...

I guess I should mention she had her surgery done through the military Tricare and lives in Las Vegas. Maybe that's the difference since there's so many buffets there?

A friend of mine who had the lapband done earlier this year received a card that basically says she's had a surgery done and that it's medically impossible for her to have large amounts of food. Therefore restaurants are to allow her to order off the child menu, buffets charge the child price etc... I asked about this and people looked at me like I was crazy... Does anyone else have one of these and if so how/where did you get it?

Suggest something else, other than dinner. Our society is focused on food, but one of the great things you can do now is take your focus off of it, and theirs as well by suggesting other fun first date ideas. Something active and pack lunch? Or Something fun and active where you can "snack" during it with a shared item or two like bowling so it's not obvious that you're not eating as much. Or a coffee date, or something other than "FOOD" good luck. I know it can be hard!

This is great! I'm looking forward to my next cruise, my mom who's an avid cruiser as well was like "You know Yvette you won't get to enjoy all that great food" and I'd rather not. The last time I hit a goal and went on a cruise, I came off a size bigger.. it will NOT happen this time! lol

WOO HOO!! I'm excited with you!

I'll be 2 weeks post-op tomorrrow and no hairloss. Then again what I was reading in the other thread sounds like a normal day for me, but as you can see by the pics I have a TON of hair, so brushing through it every day I lose a "wad" of hair everyday. Your hair, is on a growth cycle. You'll have to figure out where you're out in your growth cycle and then have a plan of attack. If you know you got a haircut and color 6 weeks ago, then it's easy to figure out, etc... But from my understanding it's wise to stay away from processing your hair during the losing phase and to work on keeping your scalp clean and stimulated. I posted an article I found while researching this in the other thread, it's rather helpful but I agree with Lolly - Protein. Because if most were to research they would find out the recommended amount of protein is just that a recommendation, that doesn't take in your personal situation or goals into account.

Just jump in and start posting.. I don't know anyone on here but I post and blog, blog and post and out of no where I get random friend requests. Definitely not my clique, but I'm glad to have an online support system. I'm sure, as with ALL social gathering, there may be some cliques but they best way to infiltrate one is to just be consistently you, they tend to come to you. Or in my experience anyways. I know there's a bit of a division is "old school" vs. "new school" bandsters as some have been very successful but have a weird attitude with newbies who seem to be very well informed and can actually question them about something or make them second guess a surgery they did like a painful tummytuck to reach their goal. They take it as judging and have a "wait til you get where I am, IF you even get there" type attitude. But even with that... eff'em! All of this is just pixels on a screen....you hit the red X at the top of the screen or you turn the computer off and we all go away....Don't get your feelings hurt by it. :Dancing_wub:

Have you asked if it's possible to trade the chiro for the accu? Since he's SO certain it's the only thing that will help you? If he's so certain, he should be willing to let you try it and see if it helps. With the type of pain you're describing I can only assume exercising isn't really an option for you at this point correct? That is more than likely the issue with the stalled weight loss. Your calories in vs. calories out ratio.. you're maintaining, but as you said not gaining, which is a good thing. I'm shocked your doctor didn't suggest bypass over banding because of your condition. I have a friend with FM and everything hurts her, all the time, once she did the bypass her pain was manageable after dropping 50lbs in about 6 weeks, she was able to workout and lose. Go off pain meds, and go into "natural" pain management. Speaking of natural have you and your dr tried those types of methods? I feel your frustration through the screen and I genuinely hope your situation gets better. All the best!

Don't stress about the seatbelt this it really does depend on the plan and what seat you're in. As for the rest, that's great that your family is so supportive! This is EXACTLY what you needed! Congrats!

I have two seperate boxes that say "Skin, hair and nail nourishing" I have Peach White Tea and Pomergranate.

Couldn't agree more...

what are you doing for a pre-op diet?

you're well on your way to your new life, your best life is ahead! Congratulations :Dancing_wub:

After... the manner or protein doesn't matter whether it's eating it or drinking, just important to get it in.

Banded or not, you should always take in Protein within an hour of exercising. Your muscles build and feed off of protein. You want to make sure you're fueling your muscles while you're burning fat. What personal trainers call "the after burn" your body will continue to burn 30-60 mins after you've stopped working out. Personally I drink "Whey Up" and Water while I'm working out. The "Whey Up" is a protein gatorade type drink but it tastes like a 5 hour energy drink.. Then I usually end with a Protein shake or Protein Bar if I'm not due for a meal. The upside of what I do is I'm around professional athletes, fitness experts and trainers all the time, I just soak in their knowledge and at times apply it lol... Hope that helps.