Tina912

You know what happens when we cut corners on ourselves. Right? Part of what got us an invite to the Obesity Ball, sweetie! You wouldn't cut corners on your kiddos. So don't do it on yourself, it will have lifelong impact on them if you're not healthy and teaching by example: if something doesn't work fully or as it should, change it until it works again and succeed! What a cool thing to teach them. Persistence and engenuity!

Wow! That was amazing and I greatly appreciate the pep talk. I know what needs to be done and I need to stop cutting corners. I hope my next post is I have reached my goal. I go back to see the surgeon next week so I am busting my bubble to at least reach the 180 goal set for me. Thanks so much!

Congrats on so many things!
You're weight loss from 300lbs Maintaining in a 10lb window for the last year following your honeymoon period Raising a family Working Going to school to provide a better future for yourself and your family. Recognizing you have an issue and need practical suggestions for change, rather than ignoring the situation. That's amazing and sure doesn't sound like someone who is failing WLS. Make sure to give yourself credit, cuz the morale very rarely improves with beatings.
You know in your heart of hearts that you have a decision to make. It lands solely on your shoulders. And you already know the answer. The answer is you HAVE to want to choose to go back to the old rules from your surgeon that actually worked. Or if they don't work, then you have to find new rules. But at the heart of it, you must take action, quit rationalizing, have a game plan, and implement the plan.
No one likes going "BACK" on a diet. No one. Cuz it's like 2-3 weeks of PIA and pain.
You're not feeling satiety cuz frankly, you are rationalizing bad behaviors that contribute to the problem. Maybe you are:
Eating too many carbs which cause blood sugar and insulin spikes which drive hunger. Eating too quickly of the wrong things Eating too much "comfort food that is sliderish" and lacks density Not eating Protein first Eating the wrong kind of protein Not eating things that are low calorie and low carb that will help fill you up (ie al dente and raw veggies along with dense lean protein and a bit of healthy fats) Not following the rules about drinking and eating at the same time or in close proximity of each other Not fully hydrating Not taking time for you and not exercising etc. etc. etc. But these are all fixable things! The rules exist for a reason. They work! They get results!
Honestly, sugary foods, and sugar alcohol sweetened waters make me MORE hungry! They wake up my cravings! Same with candy bars protein bars. To me those things have no place during active weight loss. All they are is crack cocaine that helps sabotage your diet and plays mind games with your resolve. Maybe some of you can eat them as a snack during maintenance in order to drive calories up to maintain? But they wake up cravings in most of us.
I'm much better off eating a cheese stick and a hard boiled egg than eating a protein bar! Even beef Jerky and cheese sticks are better than protein bars! They have P3 packs (cheese, meat, nuts or boiled egg, cheese, nuts) that can be stuck into a back pack! Easy meal on the go! Etc. There ARE solutions. They just may not be as "nummy" as a candy bar! But they ARE more feeling and won't drive cravings!
Go back to the basics. Kick the taste of sweet to the curb. Meal prep on days off! Go back to eating "boring" easy button meals for 2 of 3 meals. You can turn this around and finish what you started without more surgery or diet pills...just sayin'!!

Hey Kathy!!!! Thank you so much, I literally remember you helping me when I would post 24/7 on here! Lol thank you hope you are well [emoji173]️[emoji173]️[emoji173]️

::Deep breath:: Hello? ::tap tap:: Anyone here?
How are you? I am fine-ish. I mean, I feel fine and I look fine but something is still holding my happiness back.
Actually, if I am being honest, I am not fine. I am scared, anxious, worried, afraid, concerned, freaked out but dedicated to doing this surgery.
I am scared because both of my parents have had gastric bypass surgery and have had life long effects that are most likely attributed to the surgery (vomiting, dehydration, shitting themselves to death, Constipation, Vitamin deficiency, neuropathy). I am anxious because I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder and, though treated and kept in check, my anxiety knob still gets turned to 11 when I am faced with a huge changes. I am afraid of permanently ruining my body and life through this surgery in an attempt to lose 60 pounds (the same 60 pounds I have lost and gained many, many times). I am concerned about not being able to live with the changes because I am "addicted" to fast food (not really, but I do enjoy eating all things fried and fatty, possibly more than the next person). I am freaked out because this will be the biggest change (besides having my amazingly perfect son) in my life.
But, I am dedicated to this surgery because of so many reasons. Some of these reasons may seem petty and unimportant but - to me - they all encompass my WHY!! Oh, so cliche, but important to remember. Perhaps I should be playing some kind of slow, emotional music as I write this to make it even more dramatically sad and moving. Please think of your favorite emotion driven sound track during the below paragraph. Ready? Ok...I can wait while you think of one...
Ok, here goes my WHY list: live for as long as I can with my son and husband, get fully healthy, look fantastic in photos from nearly every angle, stop back/side cramps whenever I stretch, remove bra extender for good, wear my wedding ring again, wear my wedding dress (size 4), wipe my butt without straining, wear high heels again, no more double chin, look sexy and beautiful, have sex again, stop taking pills (metformin, thyroid med), wear a bathing suit, look younger or at least my age (33), 'fit in' with the MILFs, wear yoga pants and not feel stupid, wear clothes that are stylish, have my outside match my inside. <end emotional music here>
But who am I? Who is AHappierMe - that is the burning question, right? (ok, just pretend it is a burning question and not a UTI):
Real Name: Amber
Sex: Female
Age: 33
Turn Ons: extra money, exotic vacations, Italian accents <--Ooops, sorry, that went to an awkward place.
Medical Issues: Reoccurring Pregnancy Loss (6 miscarriages), PCOS, Hypothyroidism, Diabetes, High Blood Pressure, Generalized Anxiety Disorder (most likely caused or influenced by the repeated pregnancy losses).
Weight Loss Attempts: Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Low Carb / No Cab, South Beach Diet, Cabbage Diet, Fasting, Low/No/Negative Calorie, juice fast, Slim Quick, Sim Fast, Protein Shakes, measuring food constantly, trying to trick myself into think I could be anorexic (no kidding - it worked for about 4 days then I realized that I couldn't give myself an eating disorder and binged like there was no tomorrow), intermittent fasting, fad diets and diet pills.
Highest Weight: 200 (after having son)
Lowest Adult Weight: 122 (aged 22, when I got married)
Current Weight: 180
Goal Weight: 120
Height: Too Damn short for my weight! ::Audience goes WILD:: Ok, it is 4'll.
Lastly, my husband is currently in the process of getting the bypass done too and should have surgery in late August. I am INSANELY excited for him. He is 6'0, 350 pounds and is very much ready for this change. My consultation appointment is August 18 but I have already passed the requirement of getting the surgery. I wish time would move faster but I must wait 3 months after my husband's surgery to have mine. In the meantime, I will be updating at least daily on this same topic. I will be updating about my husband's progress and my progress through this journey.
Here is a quote to wrap up this post: "Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end" - Robin Sharma (don't worry, I didn't know him either. Apparently he is a Canadian motivational speaker)
Toodles!!

Today a stranger called me skinny... Sitting in a doctor's office a woman I used to be comparable in size to asked me to trade seats with her because I had (out of old habit) sat down in a bigger chair without arms and the only seat left was a smaller chair with arms.
She walked over and blushingly embarrassed and asked if I would mind moving over to the other seat so she could sit down too. I smiled politely and told her of course. She joked that some chairs were for skinny people like me and some were for fat people like her.
I felt the hurt in what she said. I remembered it, I knew the bitter taste of those words.
I moved that armed chair closer to the unarmed chair and told her a year ago I would have needed that bigger chair. I told her I understood and that I was sorry I was thoughtless enough to even require her to ask me to trade in the first place.
We talked for a while. I told her about my RNY bypass and how in 11 months I was down 120lbs. I lost a person. I told her that in my head I still look for the bigger seats because that person from a year ago still lives in my head. I only see a real difference in pictures. The biggest change I made for myself because of that realization was to take lots of pictures. Everyday I show myself the progress I have made because I can't see it in the mirror that clearly. I showed her my pictures and she was amazed. We discussed my before and current stats including weights and measurements.
I made a friend today. She called me skinny and it felt foreign and bizarre but we touched each other's lives and found a common bond.

I don’t post on here much I mainly read and get advice, but I wanted to post about my progress I had gastric bypass in April 2017 a few complications with balloon dilation, 3 of them! But I’m so glad I had this surgery, it’s changed my life for the better. I can keep up with my 3 year old son better, work is so much easier, and life in general is better. I feel like I’m a happier person. Sometimes I still struggle with my brain, I think it still is sees the fat persons I once was, but I look at old pictures to remind myself no look you’ve come so far!!! My family is supportive as much as they can be but they all struggle with weight and eating with them is difficult. I usually have to bring something different.
I find it’s still hard to get the 80 grams of Protein my dr wants me to get but I try every day! I’ve mastered Water and vitamins!
SW: 325
CW: 198
AGE: 37

Yasssss I did that!

289.7LBS on the left.
138LBS on the right.
16 months post-op.

I eat anywhere from 120 to 200g of carbs daily...but I'm physically active via 20+ miles of running per week and heavy weightlifting 3 times weekly, so my body uses the carbs.
I also maintain a body weight of 118 to 122 lbs while eating in the 2000 to 2300 calories-per-day range. Lifting heavy weights allows me to eat more without storing it as body fat.
You best believe I'd curtail my carb intake (and caloric intake) in a New York minute if I lived a more sedentary lifestyle because I know it would probably spell REGAIN.

I definitely think if you *know* it's a problem food, to skip it. But there are people who didn't live for ice cream (I am NOT one of them, thankyouverymuch! I'd cut you for Ben and Jerry's New York Super Fudge Chunk) who could eat something like Halo Top and do fine. It's really not much different than a yogurt, which I can eat without going overboard. I dunno, I guess in my newbie brain, I hope to be able to eat most normal things in moderation and have a bite or 2 of the 'better' version of an old favorite, like a little high-Protein Pasta or low-carb tortillas instead of my old flour friends. I may be wrong, of course!

IMHO- that is quite a lot of calories for only a few weeks post OP. Maybe cut out the "salad" part and just have tuna or eggs by themselves. I don't really count calories- just protein and carbs, but my usual calorie intake at 3 months post OP is between 600-800 per day. You are doing awesome on the protein intake! I average between 70-90 per day of protein. Good luck!

I'm almost three years out, and I am maintaining. I am working really hard right now to do that. I do get hungry now, though it is more manageable than before. One thing for sure, the sleeve does help, but you can still "eat yourself sick", it just takes less food to do it. But it's still the same problematic behavior - eating beyond need or hunger. That can only be controlled by your brain, and it gets harder to do over time. I was not prepared for that at all, but even knowing that, I wouldn't change my mind. I would have never been able to lose 145 pounds and keep it off more than 5 minutes.

No good advice here. I eat fast always have. I like my food super hot, so that is how it is.

If you are weighing and measuring your portions before you eat it shouldn't matter if you eat fast.

Thank you for the explanation. I'm doing my homework on this to be prepared. I've been having this conversation with my husband. He's one of those people, he likes food, but it's totally a fuel thing for him. He eats because he has to. I freely admit I have an issue with using food to soothe my emotions. This has been much more in the past 5 years. Confessing this and seeing that I must address the deeper issues. Yes, I'm one of those people that has baggage as mentioned and I can see this. I already told him we may have the expense of a therapist because I can't do the "obese" thing anymore.

Even early on in ur surgery you can go out to restaurants with friends. I was only 4 days post-op and went to Japanese Hibachi...of course all I could eat was the clear onion Soup and drink Water, but I got to socialize and be with friends. I asked the waiter to bring me a bowl with everyone elses appetizer and then i ordered another bowl during main course....I didnt finish either and just sipped on it, but at least I had something in front of me while everyone was eating. Last night (7 days post-op) I went to the local bar with my friends and drink very diluted cranberry juice...it looked like a mixed drink to everyone else. There are ways to still socialize and be with those you love in public eating places...u just have to b creative and the socialization may help to get ur mind off what ur dealing with emotionally.

I wont baby you. All i did was tell you what you already know and what your doctor SHOULDVE explained to you before the surgery. You are three weeks out, on here commenting that your life is over and everything is ruined....after THREE WEEKS.

What you should be doing is focusing on your program:
Drink water
Eat popsicles or Jello
Get lots of rest
find something to engage your mind - and keep you from dwelling on these depressive thoughts you described here
start working on Protein intake to meet that goal

You can worry about your friends and your old life and doing all the things from a social aspect later.

This isnt a Jerky comment....this is providing you an ANSWER to help your original question, but you dont want to hear it so you take offense.

Proud of yourself, "but" ..... kick that "but" out of your brain! You are only 5 pounds from your goal weight and look how much you've lost!!! Please, please, revel in your new body. Love it, enjoy it, take good care of it and those extra pounds will eventually come off if you eat right and exercise....or they may not and you will still be significantly healthier than you were a year ago. I think you are being way too hard on yourself which is your old brain trying to push you into a self defeating pattern so you will go back to the way you were. Ignore that critical but and just love yourself. You deserve it!

Yes indeed. food is awesome after the liquid diet, although I struggle with it. The irony of pushing to get 600-800 calories a day, when, before surgery, you struggled to get only 1000 calories. LOL

Definitely!!! We are almost there! But about the picture, I mean take a picture of the scales!! The moment the weight is under 200... even if it is 199.9... take a picture to remember it. You worked hard for it, you are doing everything in your power to change your life, improve your health and be what you want to be! Don't let that moment go by without taking that picture, and every goal weight after that. I focus on the 5's and 10's...
One day, I will look back at those pictures, with those date stamps and congratulate myself for the long road and my decision to change my life. My dedication and persistence. And so should you!!! Yay!!!!!!

@erinhazey
pouch reset is a FAD diet and completely useless.
You already said what you needed to do. Which is weigh your portions and not eyeball them.
Also you are healing you are SUPPOSED to be able to eat more as time goes on. I started off only being able to eat an ounce at a time and I could eat 2-3 ounces by your point. By 6 months it was 3-4. I'm 2 years out and I can eat 4-6. This is dense Protein. I can eat endless amounts of sliders like just about everyone else.
If you are eating protein, alone and protein first, you almost never have to worry about over eating, what you can eat is limited. You will also be full longer. Learn to work with your sleeve instead of against it.
liquids, soft foods, sliders. They all work AGAINST your tool, not with it. The sleeve isn't like bypass or other surgeries. The best tool we have is our restriction and that resriction is triggered by DENSE protein. You are early out so your protein can only be so dense, but protein is always going to make you the fullest, and give you the most satisfaction. It will prevent you from making bad choices and other mistakes because it is satisfying and takes up all the room in your sleeve.
Make your life easy and work with your surgery and not against it.

We never set a goal. I cranked along, lost weight steadily, for about 6 months. Since then, life has intervened, I've been pretty lazy about hitting the gym, had 3 vacations this summer, etc. I haven't gained any weight, but I haven't lost any more, either, and my 1-year visit is in a month. I need to get back on the wagon and move further into health!
One thing my surgeon did at my 9-month visit which threw me a bit: She asked me what I want to weigh! I'd never thought about that! I told her probably about 160-165. She said that sounds like a good goal for me, given my age, etc. She said I should shoot for 106-175, with 170 being the "warning" point. Well, I've not gotten down that far yet, but today is the first day of the rest of my life, and I'm working on it again.
I decided I'd not worry about weight goals and such, just stick to my eating plan and get back to the gym. I have spent my entire life focused on what I weigh, what the numbers on the scale say, and letting that dictate how I feel about myself. I didn't have this surgery so I could spend the rest of my life focused on these things, too. I feel good, I like how I look, and I am happy. If I never lose another ounce, I am SO glad I had this surgery! (but I know I can lose another 20 or so pounds!)

Thanks, everyone. My newbie nerves are real, and it is kind of you to take a moment and share your experience and perspective. My goal for having the surgery is focused on health, mobility/activity, and avoiding developing the cholesterol/blood sugar problems I was starting to inch toward which are so common in my family. The idea of a numeric goal, I think, was wanting a point where someone professional would say, "hey, you've done well, you're in a good place, you should feel free to switch to maintenance now and feel ok relaxing a little bit so long as you stay on the path." But, some of you have said and you are right that that is still about seeking outside validation. :deep breath:

@FlyFatA$$Fly
maybe not for you, but...........

@bossportsgal glad you did well
on the race - never doubted you would!
does the speed i used to do at a buffet
count towards running a race? LOL
if it does, i usually ended up in first place!!
kathy

First, there isn't the excitement and motivation from the scale, looser clothing or others complimenting.

Second, it's a fine line between losing & gaining, at least for me. VERY difficult to find that line and be able to stay comfortably there, for life. You don't want to feel deprived as that will lead to old habits & regain. You need to always be mindful of eating/exercising without it consuming you. You need to find an exercise program that you can do consistently and your relationship to food must be eat to live NOT live to eat.
In the losing phase, we sometimes feel like our way of eating/exercising is a temporary way of life until goal. It's not, this is for life if we want to maintain.