Jachut

We're not as enlightened downunder! I think that about the same proportion of our population is overweight or obese as the in the US, but its much more unusual to see super obese people with BMI's well over 40. We cater to bigger people more so than we did when I was in my teens (when I was an Australian 16, that's about a US 12 to 14 and I couldnt buy jeans to fit me, they just didnt make em that big) but at 245lb and a BMI of 35, I couldnt fit into those desks when I went back to university to do a Bachelor of Education at age 35. Luckily, I learn by listening, I have never taken notes in a lecture in my life, so I just sat with the desk up. I fit in the seat OK, but the desk would be wedged against my stomach. I'm 5ft 10 too, so at a BMI of 35, I was hardly a round barrell with an enormous stomach, I was just a big person. As I lost weight it was a major victory to sit comfortably in those desks. Nowadays of course, there's heaps of space between my stomach and the desk, you'll get there too. I didnt make a big deal of it, just sat down and didnt pull the desk, dont think anyone would ever have noticed that it didnt fit me.

I agree with what's been said above - you're still healing, swollen and thus very restricted. Its not a good idea to be pushing more food through. Eating so little is not going to hurt you for a while, remember, you're obese now, your body has plenty of reserve, plenty. Starvation mode - meh. People would never starve to death if that were true. And you're not going to become malnourished in a few short weeks. My advice is to ENJOY it. You'll be hungry soon enough and then spending months getting to good restriction. I almost half of my excess weight in the first 12 weeks after surgery with no fill at all, it literally fell off me in that time. Even with tight restriction years down the track I was never ever able to replicate that superb restriction and lack of appetite that I had in the first 12 weeks. Dont waste this valuable window! Its a real mental adjustment, for people who eat what they want, when they want and in large quantities, we have very very skewed ideas about what a healthy intake is. Wait even a few short months and then see how gobsmacked you are by what people shovel down their cake holes. Your perception is not really reality just now, just listen to your body.

Ever since i was banded over five and a half years ago, my stomach has been crazy loud and gurgly the miniute I lie down at night. Its not gurgling from food/liquid moving through the stoma, its air in my intestines. DH is banded too and he is the same, we often get into bed at night and laugh at the symphony our guts produce. I cant lie on my back going off to sleep because its so loud and violent it keeps me awake, i have to lie on my side, that quietens it down a bit. Now this may be TMI, but all that air never made it to the rear end, nor did I need to burp. Its kinda like bubbles rising to the surface, because the activity does die down after 20 minutes or so. I have had an ileostomy for the past 6 months and so now I dont, ahem, fart so to speak, but my stoma does - I cant control it or hold it in and since I have had the stoma, all this gurgling starts up and it makes loud, long noises and my bag blows up like a balloon for that 20 minutes! I usually have to get up 3 or 4 times to let the gas out of it, and then it all qietens down and i can go to sleep. But all this only happens when I lie down! It doesnt appear to be related to a full tummy, I dont generally eat at night, its not over-restriction as I have no Fluid at all at the moment, but it doesnt hurt, or cause me any problems and my sleeping partner is my DH of 20 years so I just dont worry about it.

The thing is, when you have a stuck episode, particularly a bad one, you can get swollen and inflamed from that, and that makes you even tighter and can really hamper your return to normal eating. Sometimes a total unfill is what is needed to let things calm down. the thing is, and i can hear people say "oh, if i could do this unfilled, I wouldnt need a band" but you need to realise that it IS in your control whether you let an unfill affect your weight loss. I agree, its almost impossible to do long term, but until you get back to restriction just focus on eating small meals, not eating between meals and getting your exercise in and you wont regain a ton of weight, its that simple. If you try to persevere in the state you're in, you could damage your band, and at the very least make yourself totally miserable. Go and see your doc and get it sorted, being unfilled is not that scary and it does not have to mean you'll suddenly pack on weight.

Organisation! I always make double when cooking things like curries, soups, spaghetti sauce and am never without freezer meals. If I havdnt pulled anything out to thaw we'll have something like a can of minestrone and toasted sandwhiches and I always have the fridge stocked so we can make a speedy pizza on pita bases. You just have to plan.

I've been through it, I know how you feel. I had to ahve all my Fluid removed for a big surgery to remove my rectum and part of my colon and to form an ileostomy. Part of this was several colonoscopies and bowel preps, a fair bit of fasting pre procedures and a whole lot of fear and stress, then it took about seven days to get back onto solid foods following the surgery, followed by a couple of weeks of very very high stoma output, diarrhoea. As you can guess, i dropped a fair bit of weight during this time, and had also done so during the pre op chemo and radiation so all in all, I finished up at a BMI of 19, from my previously healthy 21 or so. I've been in contact with my lapband clinic regularly. From telling me when they emptied my band that I could begin refilling 3 weeks after surgery (and then unfill again for the second surgery to close the ileostomy some months down the track), my doctor has steadfastly refused to give me ANY fill at all because of my low weight. I get this, I havent truly asked for it, but most people will need fill to maintain their loss and I'm no exception. Anyhow, today I finally got some, six months later. I've worked so so SO hard over the past six months to not gain weight and all I've regained is just enough to bring my BMI up over 20, but with chemo finished, full recovery complete, my appetite is returning to normal and its been getting easier and easier to gain and I've had several weeks of "dieting" after small gains to get them off before they stick around. Today I had to absolutely do my block in the surgery because my doctor didnt want to give me any because she said "you're a healthy weight". Well, duh, it was that same doc who told me to expect a weight gain with the unfill, that virtually nobody could keep the weight off long term without it. I wasnt looking for tight restriction to lose, just enough to maintain my weight. After I kind of yelled a bit and said that I had this damn band and I wanted to use it, she gave me a 1cc fill, with another 1cc sheduled for 3 weeks time. So...... it IS possible to keep the weight off for quite a long period of time. I simply "dieted" the whole time. I finished eating when I knew I should, i stayed away from bad foods, I filled up on fruit and salads, I exercised, and overall tried to eat not much more than I did with restriction. I found I moved from a pattern of little and often eating to 3 square meals, but overall calories remained about the same. You can do it, its simply a matter of how much you want it, harsh as that sounds. But six months was stretching the limit of my abilities, I'm finally starting to crack and am very very glad to have had some fill. Good luck to you!

Its exactly like your belt getting looser, it needs to be tightened. Its not that you need more and more fill to keep your attitude in check, its that you need it to take up the space that's created by fat loss.

I was always told to keep my heart rate under 140 and these days, I could do that easily whilst running, therefore, running, as long as its comfortable, should be OK. Its important not to get too hot, so dress in layers, and dont go out in the hot sun, stay well hydrated. I think its important to listen to your body, that's the main thing. If it doesnt feel good, dont push yourself to do it and dont forget that over time, it will take a less intense session to bring you to the same heart rate - its pretty hard for your body to pump blood and oxygen efficiently during exercise with a huge obstacle in its abdomen! Walking might be enough in the latter stages, even for a fit person. There's absolutely no reason too why you cnat continue with strength training and that is unlikely to overheat you or push your heart rate too high. Personally, I have found it easier to run and exercise vigorously right through radiation, chemotherapy and major abdominal surgery than I ever did whilst pregnant. I wasnt huge, didnt gain excessive weight but it just felt bad bad bad to do anything vigorous and I would suffer from severe dizzy spells, strong braxton hicks contractions, major sciatic pain and a very annoying urge to pee 75 million times in half an hour, lol. I did pretty much jack sh&t and I paid for it, whith gradual declining fitness and increasing weight over my years of childbearing. Maybe the vanilla slices and custard tarts had a bit more to do with it, but not getting any exercise didnt help.

I'd agree, unless childrens' menus are very different in the States than they are in Australia, there's rarely anything on one you would want to eat, let alone should eat. Hot dogs, pizzas, nuggets and chips. Personally, I think its the perfect time for an attituden adjustment - eating out is about sampling, trying something new or having something you wouldnt be able to cook at home, it is NOT about getting value for your money. Eating your money's worth is the old way, the way that made us all fat. Enjoy the experience, enjoy a little of the food and be happy to pay for that, it costs the same whether you stuff yourself or not, so why do it? We're not allowed to take leftovers home here, its against health regulations, but they're rarely good reheated, well I wouldnt bother, anyway.

I cant eat a whole 6 inch subway sandwich and I dont have any Fluid in my band at all! I tried once and it came back up and I was full to bursting at about 3/4 the way through it. Goes to show there might be something in the theory that your stomach shrinks. I think with regard to amount of food, everyone is different and if it doesnt actually hurt - ie. you're feeling stuffed full, and you can feel the pressure, then you're probably not going to stretch your pouch out. But I would always be cautious with bread and other foods that swell with a labpand - even though I do eat them regularly, take it very slowly and allow it time to swell if its going to. There's nothing worse that scarfing it down and THEN it decides to expand and you find out after the fact that you ate way way too much.

I lost about 120lb, have a BMI of 20 at 5ft 10 and I still feel fat many days. I have gained 7 b very needed pounds after having been ill and its driving me crazy, I'm every bit as much obsessed with that as I was with 120lb. I dont think it ever goes away but my problem now is more resisting becoming TOO thin, because no amount is ever enough for me, I could always be a bit thinnner, yet looking at photos of myself three or four months ago I lookedabsolutely awful, like I'd come out of a concentration camp. Yet I still want to go back there, simply to prove I'm in control. Its definitely a complex issue and my challenge now is allowing myself to maintain this healthier weight without trying to lose it again. My problem is I'm so tall, taller than some men too and it still makes me feel big. I think I'm striving to feel petite and that is just simply never going to happen.

Hmm, there's no lapband lounge anymore, so here seemed as good a place as any. This isnt lapband related, but so many have offered me messages of support in the past few months, I thought I'd let you all know that treatment is finished! I've been in hosptial this week with another suspected bowel obstruction, which cleared without any problems, just a very sore tummy for a day or two. I've had about five of these episodes, and we've never been able to find any physical obstruction such as an adhesion or stricure, nor any food obstruction blocking my stoma so we're fairly sure now that these painful episodes are a side effect of chemo for me. As we all know, chemo does affect your digestive system quite badly and I've had all the nausea etc. If you ever want to SEE what it does to your body, its fascinating to have a stoma, which afterall is simply the inside of your intestines sticking out of your abdominal wall. Mine went purple, grotesquely lumpy and swollen and had ulcers all over it on Sunday and sure enough, by Sunday night, i'm doubled over and heading into emergency to be admitted for bowel rest. As my oncologist pointed out, this was no doubt what the entire inside of my digestive tract looked like at this point in time, so this time, given I have only four chemo sessions to go he decided we'd just finish up early - afterall they got ALL the cancer at surgery, there was no lymph node involvement and this last six months of chemo has been precuationary only. I am beyond thrilled that I can finally end this awful cycle of nausea, depression and heading back every week, just as I'm starting to feel better, to poison myself all over again. Wine and coffee will finally taste good again! I will not have to head out for my run feeling like I'm moving through thigh deep water! I can train for another 10K event. I dont have to baby myself, take it easy, apologise to my DH for not feeling up to helping in the garden, with the painting or even heading out to a movie on a Friday night. So I now have about 10 glorious weeks to myself, my body is mine again for the time being. I intend to pick up the exercise beyond maintenance levels, I've gotten a wonderful casual job (since I wasnt able to teach this year) working with a company that does incursions into primary schools teaching gynastics to the junior grades, and I'll be able to do some casual relief teaching, get of the house and no longer have a trip to the shops for a coffee as the most exciting point of my day! Thankfully I've gotten through this with a headful of healthy hair, I look well and although the doctors have been very concerned at my low weight a few times, its held fairly steady and i'm a little bit too thin but not gaunt or emaciated or sick looking. Its actually been great to have an unfilled band and to learn that I have changed, that I'm not the overeater I was and that my motivation to look after myself is not all coming from that little bit of silicone but that I can actually proudly claim a lot of credit for it. I'll have my ileostomy closed in about 10 weeks time and it will be a bit of a challenge, it can be difficult to get a predictable and manageable bowel function going again and I'm very apprehensive about possible incontinence for a while, dietary issues, whether I'l be able to go out for a run without wearing a damn diaper, all sorts of scary stuff, but its also entirely possible that I'll be right as rain within a month or two and I have resolved to stay OFF the internet searching out horror stories. I'm blessed that financially I can work when I want to and dont have to return until I'm confident that my bowels wont be a worry to me every day. So all in all, I've nearly got my life back, thanks for listening, it felt really good to write that down. Telling others kind of makes it real!

I think youre largely right. I certainly am not/was not hungry all the time. I ate because I wanted to, I fancied something, I had nothing better to do, and I can now recognise also that a big gutload of something sugary and carby is a good stress release for me, I feel it hit my bloodstream like a drug. The band never made that go away and also the foods that provide that feeling were also still edible in large quantities for me. But the portion control was a BIG deal for me, its been the hardest thing since being unfilled - not avoiding the wrong foods becuase I always had to do that since I could always eat them, not avoiding the inappropriate between meals eating because I always had to work on that, simply the larger meal size. I have to stop before I feel "full" and satisfied or I will gain weight, because I think that mechanism is simply inherently absent in my body, I will eat a large meal if I let myself every time. However, due to the mental push the band gave me and the phyisical portion control, I lost the weight. I have been at a BMI of under 23 for over 3 years now and I just no longer think of myself as a fat person, so quite simply, i dont behave like one. I know that eating right and exercising every day is just like cleaning your teeth - something you just do to look after yourself but as an added bonus, if you let yourself, if you approach it right, it brings you feelings of happiness and accomplishment too, so I do it. And I stay thin as a result. It is all in you head, certainly, but some of us need a bit of a push to realise that. And I firmly believe that my commitment to healthy living and exercise and feeling of purpose and competence that gives me, has gotten me through cancer treatment so positively and so well. I have something so precious that I am absolutely and utterly determined to hold onto and that has kept me going through some pretty rough times.

They'll manage you knowing your history - they're so careful nowadays anyway - I had those awful pump up leg things that squeeze your legs, then compression stockings and in November when I had a much larger surgery, I was also given daily blood thinners, and dragged out of bed literally 8 hours after a 5 hour abdo surgery and made to walk! I was constantly reminded to walk around the ward, encouraged to go downstairs etc, they dont let you lie around in bed. Obviously after a lapband you'll be home much sooner, so you need to remember this at home and just stay mobile as much as possible, be aware of it if you have a long trip home from the hospital too. You've suffered it before, you'll know the signs, they'll be watching you, I'd try to just relax.

If you manage your band well, meaning you dont overtighten it in the mistaken belief that this will bring incredible weight loss - the side effects are very minor and only occasional. I'd say with a fairly loose band, I've thrown up or been majorly stuck about 15 times in five years, but the little daily "ooh, what's that, better hold off that bite a minute" or the slight "ick, stuck, wonder if this is going to go on through or come up and I hope nobody else has noticed that I've stopped eating/look uncomfortable/cant talk because my voice sounds weird" signs of a slight blockage are an almost daily event for me, and eating is never just easy, comfortable and thoughtless like it used to be. However, bad as that might sound, it becomes your new normal and you truly do get used to it. Its only hindsight that make me able to identify that as my band was unfilled six months ago for another surgery. I have noticed how fast I eat now, and how it just disappears down my cakehole with little consciousness from me! I did not find life with a filled band at all difficult, embarrassing or uncomfortable and even if I did (within reason) I would trade that a million times over for the pain of being obese. Daily pain, vomiting, inablity to eat a variety of foods, inablity to take in enough food to get you through the day, having to rely on liquid calories - THAT is not normal but it is what a lot of people have for a variety of reasons a) they're one of the unfortunate minority in which there's a problem (slippage, erosion, simple intolerance of the band, hernias that cause problems etc), they're too tight or c) they are not able to adjust their eating habits appropriately. The only thing there that is not within your control is a). The other two are totally your domain.

It wont hurt the band. Be prepared for an onlsaught of self righteous abuse from non tanners though.... lol. You're a grown up and no doubt know what it can do to your skin, but it wont hurt the band.

The thing you ahve to remember is that if you're going to have excess skin - you ALREADY have it. That skin is already stretched out, those collagen bonds are already broken, you cant undo it with exercise, creams, slower weight loss, nothing. Its just down to genetics and luck. a good clue is stretch marks, if you have them, that skin isnt really going to snap back. If you're stretch mark free like I was, then you have some hope, but at 43, although I dont have an excess skin "problem", my body would look better and tighter if I'd never become overweight. But I'll take it, it sure beats still being obese. Try not to stress about it, none of us have perfect bodies and I think the key to happiness is learning to love what you have. Exercise WILL give your body a better shape and create nice muscle that will fill out the skin a bit better though, we've all seen those crash diet after pictures where people have lost 500lb in 4 weeks and look like they've walked out of a concentration camp. That's the look you get when you lose the wrong sort of weight - too much muscle, proper diet and exercise, plenty of Protein, enough carbs for energy, some cardio and some strength training will preserve your muscle as much as possible (its unavoidable to lose some muscle with weight loss) and keep you shapely rather than scrawny.

I think other people do get tired of hearing you talk about it, after a while I had to make a very concerted effort not to talk about my weight loss all the time. I mean it was huge to me, and its the same with forever talking about your kids or anything else personal to you in your life. People are interested only to a point, but they're not interested in your banding the way YOU are. Its like some people acting all offended because its christmas or easter or whatever and they go to a family dinner and its the same foods - all the fattening stuff. Some people actually expect that such occasions should be catered around their needs or include options to suit their needs, when really, why the heck should anyone else have to change their ways? That's where this forum is great - you can talk about it all you like here and know that others are just as interested. But I'd make sure to pursue other topics of conversation in the real world or people are going to start avoiding you.

Its like getting blood taken, you get the needle prick, which doesnt really hurt but nothing else, because the saline is being injected into the port, not into your tissues. So its not like an innoculation or penicillin shot where you also get the pain of the fluid being forced into your muscle. I imagine it would be a tad uncomfortable if they were digging around for your port though, luckily mine has always been easily accessed. But sheesh, there's so many things that hurt a lot more!

My port is very obvious, I have a thin mid section too. It sticks out like a beacon if I'm undressed. I never worried about it, still work a bikini however other surgery has scarred my stomach now and at 43, I probably wont show it in public again. To be truthful, at my age and after such a big weight loss and 3 pregnancies, I didnt need plastic surgery for loose skin but there sure are better stomachs on the beach than mine, its probably better covered up now that I've gotten over the thrill of actually being able to wear a bikini in public without attracting horrified stares. Other than wearing a bikini, there's nothing else that the port shows through clothing wise. Well, it does a little in a fitted Tshirt, but you'd have to be looking hard for it, kinda thing, nobody else would notice. Heck, I still wear fitted T's and I have an ilestomy bag for the time being, and nobody notices THAT, so I dont think a port is a huge problem through clothing.

the thing is with slapping and spanking, its often done in a fit of anger. I will admit I have slapped and I've done it thinking superficially that the misdeed justifies the punishment, but if I'm honest, I've done it when I've just flipped it and it makes ME feel better to lash out. That's not right, its not good parenting and its a loss of control, but hey, we're all human and my kids are well adjusted and know that I love them. Its a very rare event. Planning a spanking, like preparing for it and explaining your'e going to do it and why, that's just weird to me, that's seriously planning to physically cause your child pain, not on. Nor is using implements. But on the other hand, i think as a society we're way way too easy on our kids. They have everything that opens and shuts, they are definitely not learning a work ethic, they dont know the meaning of saving for things, doing without, making do, economising. I try to enforce these lessons on my kids and I have to listen to constant whining about why dont they have what other kids have when we also earn good incomes. I hope it pays off as adults becuase its painful to live thorugh now. But I see coming through my classroom every year a generation of spoiled, undicisiplined chidlren. Lovely kids, great personalities, loving, kind, all sorts of good things, but spoiled and undiisciplined all the same. And it coincides with our generation getting squeamish about punishments, and phyiscal punishment in particular. There's somethign to be said for instant, painful retribution for doing the wrong thing. So.... I'm on the fence. I've not felt good about spanking when I've done it becuase I know its been an out of control anger reaction.

Actually, you CAN be like that after banding and be successful too. I love cooking and I am a bit of a foodie, but I always tempered my interest because I would eat it all. With a band, I really enjoy my food MORE than I did when I could stuff my face - its really nice to ahve one of those gourmet morsels on a huge white plate kind of affairs and be satisfied with it! Getting banded doesnnt mean you cant enjoy your food and really good food is often healthy - its the cheap junk that does the damage - the McDonalds, Subway, KFC, white bread, boxed cereals etc.

the most ironic thing about it is I actuall AM sick, lol, recovering from bowel cancer and I got really really skinny for a while there and still only have a BMI of 20. Nobody says a word now! Everyone woudl say "oh, you look great" and be encouraging that I dont look like a cancer patient. But when I was 10kg heavier and still losing people were all worried that I was sick!

My husband and I are both banded but 3 years apart. Its good living with somoene with the same attitude to huge meals and junk food but other than that we're on our own journeys. Our attitude to exercise is poles apart - he will only walk, i'm a fitness freak so we do that separately most of the time and he's happy to be "not obese" anymore, whereas for me, this was always going to be a way to get right down to a low BMI. For DH, the band has worked the way it does for the average person, he lost that 60% of excess weight. So to other people it still looks liek I'm someone who takes care of myself and that my DH is a couch potato, which is pretty much true. He hasnt used his band in any way like the way I've approached mine. That's OK, we're happy enough to be supportive of one another but people are different and be prepared that it might not be some idyllic together journey where you gently complete with each other to lose pounds and excercise together every day. One of you might be wildly more successful than the other!

Not much effect here, my kids are very proud of their "hot' mum (teenage boys). Seriously too, you'll get people telling you to stop losing weight, that you'll look sick or too thin when you're still obese! Its nuts. People on this forum even say it about themselves, some people have a strange fear of a truly normal weight approaching that when the general population is fat even if not weight loss surgery obese will alarm people.