Miss Mac

I'll have what she's having!

That explains it then, why women who look like they should wear a 16/18 claim to be a size 6/8. For example talk show host Wendy Williams claims to wear a size six skirt. Really? Really????? I did not wear a six in high school when I weighed 108. (That's 123 pounds ago.)

Happy! Happy! Joy! Joy!

I'll have what she's having.

Way cool. You do you.

So.......why are you still there? That is a question my doctor asked me when I first confided in him about verbal and emotional abuse in a previous relationship. He encouraged me to do whatever I needed to do to find a place of mental, emotional and physical safety. This same ex would chide me about my weight and then bring home donuts. Not just any donut - hot Crispy Crème Donuts..... My life was full of mixed messages. No one needs to live with constant confrontation. Sounds like your kids would benefit from a calmer environment, too. Hopefully you can find a resolution shortly. As for work, it's only eight hours, it's only eight hours, it's only eight hours...........

oh man....you can get shingles more than once? I had them a year ago and was in a very dark place mentally for the worst two weeks of it. I sure don't want to go through that again. All in all, it took three months to completely clear up and quit stinging. I feel for you having to go through all that at the same time with your sleeve. Thank goodness your medical team brought you out and you were able to kick off some weight.

Nutrition guidelines from my NUT at Loyola University Health Systems for my pre-op 12 week program was this: 1) 60 + grams of protein (which is about 45 more grams of protein than I was eating) 2) Only 2 servings of fruit (not endless gobble fruit fest like before) 3) Eat more beans, not so much potatoes and bread 4) Eat the protein first, then veggies, then fruit, then I shouldn't be so hungry for starchy foods.

5) Total daily calories 1100. Log daily on myfitnesspal.com to maintain accountability 6) weigh and measure - a visual "cup" of food is not the same as an actual measured cup of food. Actually this one has been my biggest lesson in portion distortion. So far, five weeks into this part of the program, I am down 15 pounds.....so, it's working. I need this surgery so badly that I am willing to sacrifice whatever it takes to undo an adult lifetime of mis-manageing my diet. Food is not my friend. I have found out in the last five weeks that I do not need NEAR as much food for fuel as I thought I did.

I don't know if this is the right time to suggest this, but there was a psychologist on Oprah years and years ago who was speaking on lopsided relationships. She suggested that instead of thinking "I love him/her - why do they treat me this way?" Start thinking "Why would I love someone who treats me this way?" Well, this change in perspective got me out of a dark way a couple of times. P.S. I don't like confrontation either. Oh man, sorry for the tough love, but here goes..... If this is your normal instead of an isolated incident, why are you still there? I had an ex-husband who isolated me (geographically and emotionally) from my family and friends for ten long years, so I guess I just have a zero tolerance on controlling behaviors now. It took a violent death threat for me to realize that my patient longsuffering endurance was not going to keep me happy or alive. I am sorry that this person is running interference on your desire to communicate with another person. Come on back and talk to us some more. Maybe some one else has a more clinical and less sensitive take on this than I do.

Sounds like you are a modern nomad. My first ex-husband moved the family 14 times in 23 years. We were always looking for a place to live, changing utilities and libraries and churches, out of touch with old friends, getting drivers' license changed, kids were the new ones in school nearly every year, changing doctors, forwarding medical records......what a hot mess. He had a chance to take a permanent position with his employer, but it would have meant less money because he would have been considered unpromotable. I wish you the best in making that decision. My vote is for being happy and stable and having roots.

Michael Pollen has written some books on what real food is and how it is so different from the genetically modified crap that the large conglomerates pass off as food. Basically, if you can catch it or pick it, go ahead and eat it. He has also discussed cultures around the world and how their various cuisines affect their national health. One concept that has helped me resist bad decisions lately is to think of all of this commercially produced food as poison, like McPoison's, Poison King, Poison Donuts, Poison Castle, Poison Bell. Get the picture? - Yes, we see. A couple of weeks ago, I was on a three day road trip with my daughter, who is a vegan. We were in a small Indiana town that only had a McPoison's and a Poison King fot restaurants. We asked during our tour of the local Historical Society's Museum where the locals go for real food. She steered us to a restaurant in an old house. We weren't too sure of how our experience would go, but the place was very charming and we got to dine al fresco on the covered veranda. My daughter had a Portobello mushroom salad, and I had the Portobello mushroom sandwich and pulled off about half of the bread. It was the most awesome lunch I ever had that was not cooked at home. So, just sayin' we had to dig to locate a healthy option, but it was right under our noses. Anyway, once you see that other junk as poison instead of tasty friends that you miss, it will be a little easier to make good choices. I know we get tired of being strong, but those are times when your forum buddies can give you strength. I have eight more weeks of prep before my surgery, and then I am sure I will have questions daily. We can't be Miss Dolly Sunshine all the time. You hang in there, Gamegirl...we've got your back.

Dude.....you look awesome!!! Do not listen to the haters. I had a mean old rotten (now ex) husband who commented (after a successful 50 pound Atkins weight loss) "Every time you lose weight, you get jowls." Once when I had just gotten down to a healthy 135, the husband of a church friend frequently commented on how hungry I looked. Recently, my daughter told me of a t-shirt that said: YOU DO YOU.

Go ahead and take your pain meds if you need them. When my brother had some spinal reconstruction a few years back, I went to see him at the hospital. He just looked like a painful mess and had a morphine drip. I asked him how he was coping with the pain, and said he called his pain relief "better living through chemistry!"

Since I am not eating bananas and potatoes like I was before this pre-op diet, I need a tasty way to get potassium. Coconut water could help satisfy the taste for other fruits I am not getting now. Nutritionist told me two servings of fruit a day when I was eating way more than that. I tried a coconut water with pineapple this morning, and it was pretty good...pretty....good. So, maybe that and sugar free Jello will help.

In February I had a four level disc repair in my neck. Several people on a forum for that procedure suggested a remote lift recliner to sleep in for a while. It was the best $500 I ever spent for a piece of furniture. There was room right next to the regular bed, and it is still there. You betcha I will be using it again after the sleeve. It's not bad for sleeping in, and the chair does all the work for reclining and getting back up. LOVE IT.