Barbarah

I stopped losing at six months. I was very upset and it took a while to get back on track but I've managed to lose another 10 pounds (yes it took me six months to lose 10 lbs) for a total of 80 lbs the old me would have given up but not the new me. May 14th will be my one year surgerversary
I've been through so many stalls that I've lost track. I just see them as time to recalculate, try a different direction. I walked six miles today . One year ago I could barely walk around the block. I try to focus on that instead of the numbers on the scale. Don't be discouraged , you can do this.

Something similiar happened to me. I started over 300# and got into the 190s and like you was "acceptably fat" especially for my age (late 40s). I could shop in regular stores and everybody complimented me and I could do things I wanted.... my weight loss slowed to a crawl. I was losing maybe 2 pounds a month.
I thought alot about what was holding me back and I realized I had a little fear of being thin. Lots to go with that, but I examined my inner feelings and i decided i wanted to be not overweight anymore and got back on track and pushed through! I got to 158 my goal 14 months post op in Feb 2013. .... that was a loss of 150#
So, I maintained that for awhile and then got down to 150 in Sept 2013. Now I weigh about 140. I think I looked pretty good, normal sized at 158. My friend declared me officially a "skinny chick" (another friend called me skinny bitch...haha) so these last few vanity pounds made a difference in looks but not really noticable by me to be honest.
I think examining your deep down goals is great, because maybe you are "ok" where you are. If you are not okay and want to lose more, you have the tools to do it.

I stopped losing at six months. I was very upset and it took a while to get back on track but I've managed to lose another 10 pounds (yes it took me six months to lose 10 lbs) for a total of 80 lbs the old me would have given up but not the new me. May 14th will be my one year surgerversary
I've been through so many stalls that I've lost track. I just see them as time to recalculate, try a different direction. I walked six miles today . One year ago I could barely walk around the block. I try to focus on that instead of the numbers on the scale. Don't be discouraged , you can do this.

I stopped losing at six months. I was very upset and it took a while to get back on track but I've managed to lose another 10 pounds (yes it took me six months to lose 10 lbs) for a total of 80 lbs the old me would have given up but not the new me. May 14th will be my one year surgerversary
I've been through so many stalls that I've lost track. I just see them as time to recalculate, try a different direction. I walked six miles today . One year ago I could barely walk around the block. I try to focus on that instead of the numbers on the scale. Don't be discouraged , you can do this.

I stopped losing at six months. I was very upset and it took a while to get back on track but I've managed to lose another 10 pounds (yes it took me six months to lose 10 lbs) for a total of 80 lbs the old me would have given up but not the new me. May 14th will be my one year surgerversary
I've been through so many stalls that I've lost track. I just see them as time to recalculate, try a different direction. I walked six miles today . One year ago I could barely walk around the block. I try to focus on that instead of the numbers on the scale. Don't be discouraged , you can do this.

I stopped losing at six months. I was very upset and it took a while to get back on track but I've managed to lose another 10 pounds (yes it took me six months to lose 10 lbs) for a total of 80 lbs the old me would have given up but not the new me. May 14th will be my one year surgerversary
I've been through so many stalls that I've lost track. I just see them as time to recalculate, try a different direction. I walked six miles today . One year ago I could barely walk around the block. I try to focus on that instead of the numbers on the scale. Don't be discouraged , you can do this.

I feel like chopped liver.

Well done!

Ten years, wow! It does encourage me. You are so right about people talking no matter what size you are. I felt like an open wound before surgery. Everything hurt my feelings. Since surgery I've gains so much confidence and so proud that I'm finally taking care of myself.

Ten years, wow! It does encourage me. You are so right about people talking no matter what size you are. I felt like an open wound before surgery. Everything hurt my feelings. Since surgery I've gains so much confidence and so proud that I'm finally taking care of myself.

Ten years, wow! It does encourage me. You are so right about people talking no matter what size you are. I felt like an open wound before surgery. Everything hurt my feelings. Since surgery I've gains so much confidence and so proud that I'm finally taking care of myself.

I am 10 years out.. I've stayed at 150 for 10 years... If I had to do this journey all over again... I'd do it in a minute... I don't push the surgery on anyone... it is a very personal decision. I've only approached 3 women in 10 years to look into it... there complaint: I would rather do it myself... the right way... all had families all had babies... found out a couple of years ago... all three women died... all heart attacks.. this surgery is not a cure for obesity... it is not a cheat either... its a tool.. this surgery saved my life... I promise, I am a very up beat person... but I've been holding this in for such a long time... it feels sooo good just to release it...

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I'm so sorry for your loss.

Hi guys. I asked my husband to write something for my blog. Like a "WLS from a spouse's point of view" sort of thing. I will preface this by saying, my husband is my rock and I love him to pieces (sure, some days I want to push him off a cliff, but...).
This is what he sent me - I wanted to share with this audience because we all have loved ones that drive us crazy at times. I think sometimes we open up in a different way when we put pen to paper as opposed to speaking to one another. What would your spouse or significant other write if you asked them to? I was surprised by what I read here...
The wife recently asked me to write a little something for her blog. Not much on writing more than witty quips in response to my friends Facebook posts, my first response was a “oh sure” and then to politely ignore the request. It’s a tactic that works I’d say 75% of the time. I was hoping that she would be so excited (or distraught) about weight loss/lack of weight loss/not pooping/pooping/someone else pooping or not pooping, she’d forget that she asked. So a week passed and then I get a, “So I’d really like you to write a post for my blog. You know, from the spouses point of view.” I thought I was home free with her focus on the stall. Guess not.

My wife's weight has never really been an issue for me. We met over the phone and had a 3000-mile long distance relationship before the Internet and unlimited phone service. We worked in the same industry and developed a relationship over months of hours-long, bank-account-crushing phone calls. We have always said that if we had come across each other in a bar or other typical meeting place, we wouldn’t have been each other’s type, physically. Since we fell in love before we ever met, we got what we got. Which by the way, I was pretty happy with upon our first meeting. So when she informed me of her thoughts on surgery I tried hard to keep the slack jawed WTF look off my face as much as I could. I initially thought, “Your going to cut out most of your stomach just to lose a few pounds. What?” What I didn’t realize is that it wasn’t a few pounds. Much like your surprise when someone comments on how much your child has grown because they only see him once a year, I hadn’t noticed she had gained a hundred pounds since we first met. She had always just been my wife, my best friend, the person I would spend a long wonderful life with. My attachment to her has always been so much more than physical, and when I look at her I still see that 25-year-old girl I fell in love with. So when she told me how much she weighed I thought, “Holy shit, when did that happen.”

My blessing of the surgery wasn’t without hesitation. I know what obesity does to a body over time and have witnessed it first hand in my father and mother-in-law. The breaking down of joints, the insulin injections, heart issues and on and on…I know, preaching to the choir. But what if something happens during surgery and I lose the love of my life? What if our boy loses his mother? The mere thoughts made my heart hurt. How would I ever cope if something tragic actually happened? But you can’t live life on the basis that something bad MIGHT happen. Its what kept my mother from fully experiencing life and I always hated that. I wanted to have the healthiest wife possible as we get older. I wanted her to be comfortable in her skin. I wanted her to wear clothes she likes, not just the ones that hide the most. I wanted her to not feel awkward around others. I’ve never really struggled with weight. Sure I could lose more than a few pounds, but it falls off with little effort. I don’t fully understand the angst that the weight causes my wife but I know she isn’t as happy as she could be because of it. Life isn’t a dress rehearsal. You gotta make the most of it. So I agreed, reluctantly.

After coming to grips with the minimal risk involved and nervously waiting for good news from the operating room, it’s been a pretty easy journey for me. I’ve had to do very little except listen. Listen about the surgery, shakes, stalls, pooping, not pooping and then pooping again. My wife is hard-core about obtaining information off the internet. So much so, she once gave her GP a tutorial on thyroid testing and the latest acceptable ranges for each test, which came as news to her doctor. Still not sure why we had to pay for that office visit. So nothing came as a surprise. It made my life easier knowing that if anything came up post op that might freak me out, she had the stats on how many patients experienced the same thing, why it happened, how long it will likely last, and what the next day, week, month has in store. Easy for me, but I know it hasn’t been easy for her and that each day brings a new challenge. I am so grateful for what she is willing to put herself through for a healthier future with our son and me. Recently she’s been in the dreaded stall, but it’s subsided, and she has a little pep in her step. I love the gleam in her eye when the scale tells her what she wants to hear. I love how she gleefully shows off how crappy her clothes fit. Mostly I love that each day she seems to feel more comfortable in her skin and happier with herself. What more can you really ask for?

Viva la revolution!

I do know that if my mother were still alive she would have said "you are getting pretty heavy there don't you think??" And she would have asked me how much I weighed. I'm sure she would have been a true supporter of what I am doing and I am sure as well that she is looking down on me saying "WAY TO GO!!!" My husband supports me and with that and the thought of my mother that is all I need to know I am doing what is best for ME!!!

Short sheet him!

To defuse the tension, how's about winking at him and saying ..
'Yo, Richard Simmons, you can always come over here and help me burn some of this off ;)'

Thank you for this post. I was feeling a little down because of some negative comments from people around me . There is so much judgement out there . Sometimes I feel like I can't win . Before the surgery I was judged because I was too fat. After
the surgery I was judged because I had surgery to lose weight and "Took the easy way out " EASY my butt! Ugh makes me crazy.

Thank you for this post. I was feeling a little down because of some negative comments from people around me . There is so much judgement out there . Sometimes I feel like I can't win . Before the surgery I was judged because I was too fat. After
the surgery I was judged because I had surgery to lose weight and "Took the easy way out " EASY my butt! Ugh makes me crazy.

I learned an important lesson a few weeks ago. On a recent project I was surrounded by skinny women as my weight continued to pile on. I was sure they were judging me, because week by week I was getting visibly fatter. When I got sleeved, I worried about their judging me, feeling certain they were. I was frustrated and angry at these skinny women who had NO idea what I was going through. How dare they judge me when they'd never have to deal with what I did??

A few weeks ago I took one of them to lunch. Skinny, eats like a bird, very particular about what she eats, exercises like a fiend, won't eat even half a cookie. I told her about the surgery knowing that she could not understand nor relate.

And she told me that 5 years ago, she lost 80 lbs.

Which incidentally, is how much I have to lose. "I was a big girl" is how she put it. Eats like a bird, is particular about her food, exercises? Because she is determined never to put that weight on again. Won't even eat half a cookie? Because she worries she'll eat the whole plate of them once she starts.

I realized that she was not judging me, rather *I* had judged her, had completely misunderstood her habits and her struggles. It was a very sobering realization. What's that they say about walking a mile in someone else's shoes? It was a wake up call for me to not judge either fat nor skinny.

Beautiful!

(if you can't see this post without a bunch of extra HTML code, go here: http://sleevers.wordpress.com/2013/11/10/you-may-be-doing-better-than-you-think/)



Or math games geeks play.



So I see people posting how they’ve lost a lot less than those who were sleeved the same day as them. “I’m 3 months out and I’ve only lost X but everyone else has lost so much more than me.” Theoretically we all understand that if someone has a lot to lose, they will lose faster than someone who has less to lose.



But here’s an example to make it real. There’s me, with 80 lbs to lose, and there’s my friend Emily who has 180 lbs to lose. Mine are actual results, and I made up the results for Emily.



Wow, I’m doing really badly. I’ve “only” lost 35 lbs in 3 months and Emily has lost 79 lbs! Obviously, I’m failing.





But you want to know a secret? I didn’t entirely make up Emily’s numbers. Look at the picture below. Can you guess what I did?







Yup. I messed around with the numbers until Emily had lost exactly the same as I had in terms of percent excess weight to lose. I have 80 lb. to lose, she has 180 lb. to lose. In order for her to match me for percent of excess weight lost, she has to lose considerably more than I do during the same time period.



Poor Emily is having to work a lot harder to get the same results I am. And what do you know, I'm doing just fine.



This is why I strongly believe that we should move away from total pounds lost, and move to percent excess weight lost to gauge where we are in our journeys.



Here’s how to calculate your %EWL:

[Total weight lost/(Starting weight - Goal Weight)]*100
[35/(230-150)]*100
(35/80)*100
=44%
Who knew Math could make you feel better hunh?



Btw, if you're total math phobic, give me your start weight, your current weight, and your goal weight and I will do this for you.

I hiked in a cave today. For an hour. And then I swam in it. And then I walked 2 miles wearing a wetsuit and the heaviest life jacket ever. And then I walked another mile.
YESSSS!!!
This was not any old flat cave. This was a very uneven cave floor in a very dark cave, with some of it under Water and the rest above and I hiked through it for an hour.
I haven't shared this before but two years ago, I ended up in a wheelchair due to a very incompetent doctor. I was in it and bed-ridden for three months and it took me 3 months to learn how to walk again, by which time I had significant damage to the cartilage in my knees. For all of last year, I wasn't able to do stairs at all, and was reduced to using handicapped elevators if there were a ton of stairs. I couldn't sit on the floor comfortably and couldn't fold my legs in half and it took me months before I could climb in and out of a bath tub.
But today, I did all that. I hiked up and down some very rough terrain, I fell, I scraped my knee, I used a big stick to balance myself. I stepped sideways, forward, back, up, and down big ledges. I had to fold myself in half as I walked, and I had to fold my knees in half. And I enjoyed every freaking minute of it.
I was probably the least well-balanced person of our group. As I said, I had to learn how to walk again, and I don't think I'm as well-balanced as I used to be. I can no longer stand on one foot for any length of time. My husband made me take a walking stick and took me to keep me company (because on my own I'm too damn macho to admit I need help).
I was so worried about today. I was sure I would peter out before everyone. I was worried I wasn't a strong enough swimmer. i was concerned I"d hold everyone up. Well, everyone else there was much younger than us, but I'm happy to see we did not bring up the rear.
Yes I struggled, but I finished it. I love my sleeve, and I love the October Challenge on this forum that got me to the point I could do this today.
And btw, my husband is freaking stud muffin. The very-fit instructor dropped his flashlight under Water. He tried to dive for it, couldn't get it. The younger guys are standing around half-heartedly offering to go get it. My 60-year old man says, here, I'll do it. Off comes his helmet and his life jacket, he dives down and gets it with no fuss.
I almost jumped his bones right there
I also now know beyond a shadow of a doubt what I want in my life. If it's a choice between being skinny and lying by the pool looking gorgeous vs. hiking in a dark, dusty cave, I'm choosing hiking.
VERY LONG post! Thank you for reading. I'm just very excited about all of it

Thank you ladies, the blue pic was a labour day mancation with some friends, so almost 2 months ago. My wife thinks I am losing too much but I am super happy. I feel like I have my youth back. I love saying hi to people I have not seen since before surgery and the look on there faces when they recognise the voice but not the face. Then the laughing and smiles as they realize who I am.