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DeLarla

Pre Op
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Everything posted by DeLarla

  1. Alex is right. I'm amending my committment to no booze for 6 months, and no eating after dinner. Yesterday I had one Coke and ate past pain. This is awful. Life shouldn't be so hard. Please remind me that I don't drink alcohol. I have gone 2 full weeks without a drink, then during my 2nd glass of wine I'll whack myself upside the head because I forget I quit. Today is Day 3 of no booze. I have to remind myself not to drink.
  2. Ladies, so far I've sent 5 huge boxes of our clothes to Baton Rouge and Louisiana. Each box contained a few of the toiletries, crayons & other things people brought and things that were sent to me from those who couldn't attend. I'm almost able to see my bedroom floor again! Thanks for everyone kicking in - our plus size sisters will know the stuff came from the Vegas Bash 2005. And Terri, thanks so much for helping with shipping and packing tape. I've gone through tons, so I really appreciated it. By the way, Mekha is my little 15 year old neighbor pal. Last year I taught her how to make my purses. She was inspired by our work, so she made five purses, then filled them with lip gloss, compacts, and other girly things. I'm picking them up tonight and adding them to tomorrow's boxes.
  3. P.S. Thank you, Michelle. I tried to avoid having the Slumber Party as part of the Bash, which is why I started it so late. But even though I drank half a pitcher of Toxic Tea, I'm glad I was able to convey the message that sex isn't dirty or something to be ashamed of. Even our shyest gal (no names) blushed but didn't stomp out of the room in complete disgust. When I do real hostess parties, I bring my own bottled Water. I don't drink whatsoever around, and I won't even accept so much as a carrot stick. Completely professional.
  4. I was already in the market to buy a business, so I purchased my Slumber Parties business specifically to promote plus size sexuality. I've had 3 parties so far, and I start the show by talking about my plus-size lingerie and explain that size doesn't dictate sexuality. Two of the parties gave me a round of applause during my opening demo because even the women that we "think" are thin see themselves as fat. Size 4 women hate their bodies because of stretch marks, cellulite and saggy skin. I originally refused to carry petite sizes, but that's just as discriminatory, so I've been adding small pieces. Before marriage I was one big sexual hang-up and never got nakey in the light. But my hubby changed that. He sees a pair of my big panties or a booby and gets aroused. I can see by the gleam in his eye that he thinks I'm hot, so beauty really is in the eye of the beholder. If your partner wants some nookie or licky licky, it's because they desire you and find you sexually attractive. My hubby has a big belly that his friends poke fun at but I find it extremely sexy. It goes both ways. As far as parties in California and Arizona, make sure to book several weeks in advance because my calendar is full through the beginning of October. And I haven't even had two seconds to devise a marketing strategy! This stuff sells itself. I can't even keep up! I started last month with enough catalogs for a year... NOT. Women fought over them so I had to place an emergency order yesterday. As far as sexual positions for the fluffy, try The Complete Guide to Sexual Positions (yep, I carry it.) It's not specifically for fluffy people, but it covers every position known to date, so you try them all till you find ones comfy for you. Better than books are the Love Ball and/or Love Swing. Both were too embarrassing for me to carry in my line, but I got over that because the demand is enormous, so I'm waiting for my shipment. The Love Swing holds up to 400 pounds and is recommended by chiropractors because it's weightless sex that removes pressure from all joints. Only one person gets in the swing at a time, and you can hide it inside a gutted lamp or fake smoke detector after installing it according to the instructions. The Love Ball is amazing. It's like a mooshy yoga ball and comes with suggestions for positions, which prop up your fun parts in ways for easier access. NOW FOR THE PERSON WHO THINKS THEY'RE FUNNY WHO HAD ME MAIL A CATALOG TO SOMEONE THAT GOT OFFENDED..... Sorry, your plan backfired. The woman was so offended by my catalog that she called me long distance. But after we both figured out that someone was playing a nasty trick, we ended up getting a good laugh. The more controversy and negativity this thread receives, the faster people rush e-mails to me requesting catalogs. Thanks for the extra business.
  5. I'm cross-eyed after all that math, but what exactly did they do to measure your muscle vs. fat? They used a pinchy-caliper thing on my turkey-gobble underarms. You really deserved these awesome NSVs. This was a happy thread!
  6. I wrote them but never received a response. Good luck.
  7. I don't think you need a new avatar. I just think you should post the full page pic with everything you post! Winky wink, Mr. Hottie.
  8. DeLarla replied to Marimaru's topic in The Lounge
    I watched American Sweathearts last night. Julie Roberts wore a fat suit as the shadow of her famous sister. Need I say more?
  9. By the way, Chris knew I was really busy, so Daddy did Sachi's manicure and pedicure this time. You girls should have asked him to do your nails!
  10. DeLarla replied to Marimaru's topic in The Lounge
    Try wearing long, dangly-changly earrings that rub against your neck or shoulders when you shrug. The windchime sound is very sexy. Same thing with beaded handbags, bracelets, etc. Wear V-necks with a long chain that bumps against your bosom, and add pretty scarves & trinkets whenever possible. When I look in the mirror, I certainly don't "see" anything sexy. But I got more attitude than most women, which makes me feel sexy. I don't even like my new blonde hair at all, but it's different and sassy. Be confident and shake it, Baby!
  11. DeLarla replied to a post in a topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
    I'm thinking of having mine removed, too. The band requires a lot of maintenance and constant medical support. I don't have a local doctor, and I feel like I'm putting my life at risk by not seeing my surgeon on a regular basis. Good luck.
  12. I should keep my camera at my desk and take pictures of myself to show you how this stuff gets me laughing so hard that I cry. That pic of our little Piglett is more than precious, but Voo & Sachi are my babies! Mine, mine, mine! Oh, and I saw lots of bOObies at the Bash! And yep, mine popped out in the pool, and this time not even on purpose! Gee, thanks Terri for trying to capture it on film! Great shots! More more more!
  13. Awe, trying to make me feel bad, Coyote? I wouldn't have taken the scooter if the other gals didn't have you in the chair yet. And I ride a 700 pound Harley with grace, so there's no way I was scooty was going in the pool. The whole time was fun.
  14. DeLarla replied to a post in a topic in LAP-BAND Surgery Forums
    I had surgery in Mexico but ran into complications. A small percentage of us will, in fact, run into complications. By the time you add up all my additional traveling and surgical expenses, I would have done better to pay $12,500 locally instead of the $8,000 I paid in Mexico. So, grab the dice and roll 'em. It's all a crap shoot. If you know that going in, you'll be prepared for the best or the worst. My best advise is to prepare for the worst but hope for the best. Good luck with your decision.
  15. Butch, you sexy thang... great response!
  16. Okay, here I am! Now that the Bash is behind me, I want to Iron out some problems. Yes, Zoe, I plan a lot of parties, but ask the gals at the bash how much food there was here. Geeze, I don't think anyone ate anything cause I still have a fridge full. I don't only eat obsessive, I shop obsessive, plan obsessive, and cook obsessive. It took a large amount of strength to stick with a 40 item salad bar when I promised a 30, cause once I started shopping I was headed for 50 items. I forced myself to put things back (oh, it was awful!) All these suggestions were great. As far as exercise, that's never been an issue. Remember, I'm an alien and enjoy my sweaty routine. My dogs don't allow me to sit on the couch - they want their leashes... now! Donali, my Slumber Parties aren't a problem, they are a solution. I don't eat or drink when I'm working other than bottled Water, and I bring a truckload of product with me. Carrying all the enormous, heavy bins, setting up, constant standing and movement for several hours (packing orders) then breaking down the display and reloading the car, then loading it back in the house is more than a workout. I have two parties booked this week, and my big goal for the week is to eat dinner before I go, drink my water during, then hit the sack without eating a morsel. If I can make it through one night like that. I'm also on the wagon. No booze for six months starting today. Back to water therapy. We each know our personal strengths and downfalls, and we all know what our own bodies personally need. My big ol' bod craves fresh, raw veggies. My belly burns, my throat is dry and clogged, my entire system feels gross. My morning shakes and big raw salads with lean meats is what my bod needs. That's what I want to give it. So, tomorrow is a new day. No more soda. No more booze, and lots of water & fresh veggies. No eating after 7:00 p.m., and that's about all anyone should have to commit to. Thanks. Wish me luck.
  17. My Band surgeon required me to purchase Picture Perfect Weightloss. It was $30.00 in the store, but I found it at Amazon.com for $6.80 (and that included postage!) It's not about the band, it's about learning portion sizes, so it relates to any weight loss program.
  18. I agree that there are a lot of ways to kick-start weight loss and clean out your system for pennies. Search the internet or ask around your local health food store. Maybe if I see someone else do it, I will, too. I have some great colon cleanse pills from a health food grocery chain that work wonders for under $20.00.
  19. Some docs give a local, others don't. Some girls don't feel much more than a pin prick. I had one normal fill. The sensation is very strange and hard to describe, but I didn't have any pain (then again, I had been sedated the previous hour, so maybe I was numb all over.)
  20. The Bash is behind me so I want to stop making excuses for being so bad, bad, bad to my band. I've been buring he candle from too many ends, and I'm exhausted so I'm not actually up to a "challenge" right now. But I will join this thread to get back on track. I'm not feeling physically well any more... my bod craves raw, fresh veggies and broiled lean meats. That's what I want to give it.
  21. Is your port area red, inflammed, swollen or filled with fluid? If so, see your doc immediately. Watch for signs of infection. I'd call my doc anyway to ask about the pain just to be on the safe side.
  22. Ya'll know I'm not a "white wall" kinda gal. Our 1st home had a textured red hallway that lead to my sunset gold living room with a dark purple hippy den, burnt pumpkin office, and a forest green guest room. When Chris saw me painting my hippy den purple with new green shag carpet he nearly fainted. But when it was done, he moved the master bedroom in there. He's afraid this neighborhood isn't ready for us. We're the riff-raff, now.
  23. Vines, did you fall out of your tree? "Let you?" Did you say, "Let you?" I'll massage your feet with a body mitten and Sensura Almond Oil for hours if you painted my house! And those are the exact colors I've wanted, with Mexican serapes for curtain bolsters. I'm dying for color, but I turned our last house into a kaledescope, and it was beautiful. But now Chris is afraid of color, so next time you're here, we'll give him the boot again and paint on! I miss you already. I have Empty Nest Syndrome - come home, girls! But glad you got home safe.
  24. I, for one, "get it" and wonder where you found him? WILSON! I need you, too!
  25. DeLarla's Toxic Teas Slice up thin - oranges, lemons & limes Add 4 parts Coke (left open all night to flatten out carbonation) Add 4 parts 7-Up (left open all night to flatten out carbonation) Add 2 parts Gin Add 2 parts Vodka Allow to marinate a couple hours. Eat the fruit as you go along. Ka-BOOM! Mind you, my Tea was too strong for most folks, so I added in extra Coke & 7-Up (flattened.) Wimps! Now don't go screwing up a perfecly good recipe by using Pepsi or Sprite, or rum JENNA! If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

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