jen_1381

I love that you also feel that you eat to live, not live to eat anymore. I am the same exact way. I started out just telling myself - I only need food for fuel for my body. If it's not lean protein, veggies, or fruiy my body doesn't need it. I've told myself this a thousand times. When I'm grocery shopping or browsing the fridge for dinner, I only look for those three categories. But just two months ago, a hamburger and fries was AMAZING. Now it doesn't even sound appealing. I kind of feel sorry for people I see eating garbage food because they have to work SO hard to burn it off.

Life is so refreshing now. I wake up every day excited and fall asleep satisfied, knowing my day was successful.

I am in love with my FitBit! I got it last night and immediately put it on. I wore it today at work and realized how much work I have to do!! Getting in 10,000 steps a day is no easy task when you're stuck at a desk most of the day.

What type of work do you do that you get the opportunity to travel to Japan?

I just bought a new scale off of Amazon and I am SO excited for it to come! All of the reviews mentioned how accurate and consistant it was. My scale now is good, it does weight, body fat, and hydration percentage, but it's not very consistant. My new scale should be here today. Even though the numbers don't quite say what I want them to, it's still very exciting.

I have those days all the time, especially when I try to start my workout in the morning before work. About 3 minutes in, I give up. Maybe because I'm fresh out of bed, or the impending work day is hanging over me, but whatever it is, I can't talk myself into sticking it out.

I do work out every evening though. I try to get myself excited for it through the day. I'll honestly think at work - man, I can't wait to get home and hit the treadmill. I make working out fun though, I mix up my routine and my husband knows it's my "alone" time, he doesn't bother me, it's just me and my iPod and my goals.

I'm right there off you about the weight loss/re-gain pissed-off-ness In the beginning of 2011 I lost 55 lbs (by May), and from Sept until December I gained back 40. I also learned that I was an emotional eater!

Good luck with your surgery tomorrow. I was banded about 5 weeks ago and so far am SO happy with my decision. I just wake up every day and tell myself that I can be successful and work with this. The first few months are all will-power and discipline. Every night that I lay down to go to sleep and know that I followed the plan for the day feels like an accomplishment.

I struggle on weekends too. This weekend, I kept an eye on the clock and stayed on my work schedule. I had my morning tea, ate a small breakfast about an hour later, then kept busy and drank water like crazy. Ate lunch around the same time as my lunch break at work, then back to drinking water. By the end of the day, I had finished 6 bottles (my bottle is 20 oz). I actually went to bed feeling satisfied instead of dissapointed that I screwed up the day.

I COMPLETELY get being "one of the guys"! I have always gotten along better than men vs women. All of my close friends are males. My husband took a while to get used to it, but since he was friends with them too he didn't stay jealous for too long. The way men carry on...as amazing as it can be sometimes, can get highly inappropriate with a lady in the room. I've reminded them MANY times that I am a girl, and although I don't have virgin ears and talk like a sailor myself sometimes, at least consider that I'm a girl!! I love these guys to the end of the world, but geesh, boys can be grose!

Watch though, I bet they will treat you differently as you progress on your weight loss journey. My friend told me the other day that I was looking really good, and I think it was as uncomfortable for me to hear as it was for him to say, but the thought was nice!

By the way - I love your blogs!

Losing weight is hard in more ways than one. Right now I'm kind of stuck, too. I've lost 33 lbs, but want to lose 50 more. My work pants look like something MC Hammer would wear (bagginess, not color wise ). I don't want to go out and buy a size smaller because I want to lose many more sizes. My jeans all require a belt and scrunch funny. So, I'm right there with you.

I completely agree with you about Medicaid, but Medicare is something that is "earned" per se. Medicare comes of course with age, but also if you have a debility that prevents you from working.

I think there is a LOT wrong with our Medicaid system, and it's horribly abused, but Medicare I see completely different.

I do completely agree with you about how frustrating it is. Even with my husbands awesome Union benefits, my surgery still cost me about $2900 total. Luckily, I hit my out-of-pocket max so everything is free the rest of the year....but knowing how hard he works for those benefits aggravates me to know someone gets them for free from the government when they weren't earned.

I am five weeks post-op. At every surgeon visit after surgery (I've had two so far) they ask on a form if you would do this surgery over again. I always, happily, check "YES".

To be completely honest, it is a challenge. My husband is SO supportive, but even little things like him asking me to grab the Oreo's are a struggle. It's a mindless question for him, but to me it's putting temptation in my hands! You have to have will power. Until you have restriction in your band and get to the allusive "green zone" it is a mind-controlled diet.

I had barely advanced to soft/moist foods and got a fill so I'm back on liquids for a day then mushies for another day. I haven't experimented much with a lot of foods, but I did learn the hard way that when you feel full, you HAVE to stop. I was always a "one last bite" person, and tried that tactic on Saturday after I felt full and I had the WORST indigestion of my life, for about 15 minutes. For me, the full feeling is a pressure-type sensation in my chest.

I have been able to sucessfully drink coffee but I haven't done it very much. I used to be a coffee addict. At least a pot a day. I quit for about 2 months then realized that one cup of coffee would cure a migraine. I've had probably 3 cups since surgery and they've gone down fine.

As a rule, I'm avoiding foods that I know aren't nutritious for me, like the bread and pastas. I'm in the mindframe of protein, veggies, then fruit if I'm still hungry and that's IT. Eventually I'll venture out but for now, it's working to help the weight loss.

Also - exercise is important! You need to do something every day. Sometimes I only have time to hit the elliptical for 10 minutes, but I do it.

But as I said it is a challenge, it is one that I am SO, SO happy I chose to take on. The feeling I get when I go to bed at night knowing that I ate healthy, exercised, and am working towards my goal is amazing. I'm proud of myself for the first time in years.

Happy to hear you're feeling better today! That's the glory of a new day. It's a new chance to start over. I try to wake up every day thinking it's going to be a great one. As for the joint account - my husband and I had one together before we got married. As long as you trust someone on that level, I wouldn't worry about it!

My BMI was 35.6 when I had my pre-op visit and 34.8 when I had surgery. I'm 5'8 and started at 243 lbs. I am now around 212, four weeks post-op. I had hypertension and high cholesterol as my co-morbidities, my insurance required two. Insurance actually denied my surgery the day before I was set for surgery, and my surgeon appealed it. He had put "hypertension" as my co-morbidity instead of "uncontroled hypertension" but he cleared it up and I was approved.

The best thing I can suggest is to work closely with your WLS coordinator. They can be your best friend through the process, mine was. They are so good at working with the insurances.

I hated jean shopping! I used to always go to Old Navy because their jeans seemed to fit best, but I would leave feeling defeated every time. I found one style and size, and that's all I would get!!

I'm one month post-op, and let me tell you, being able to go to any store and pull out a size 16's feels SO good. I still cringe in the dressing room, thinking I'm CRAZY for trying them on, but then when they fit perfect, there's hardly a better feeling!!

You'll get there!!

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I can relate with part of it. I spent the last 15 years of my life doing the busy cleaning, ENDLESSLY, to the point where I felt like I had OCD. Things had to be clean before I went to bed, or went out, or did anything. I always had to be doing something, couldn't relax. My marriage suffered because I felt like I was too busy and had too much to do before I could spend time listening to my husband. It wasn't until I went through the pre-op appointment with the psychologist when she picked up on some childhood trauma that I had been avoiding my whole life. I wasn't OCD, my brain was just insisting on keeping me busy to keep me distracted. I saw a counselor a few times after that to help me remember and accept the trauma, and I can't believe how it changed my life. I forced myself to stop...to breathe, to sit still, to be a better wife (and not by having a sparkling kitchen that he should love, right?!). Since April, my life has been completely different.

It's not always trauma, but stress can cause the same reaction. I never felt stressed but it's because I was so adapted to an extremely high stress level.

Has something changed, something that may be secretly stressing your brain? Also - have you explained to your husband how you feel? I always thought mine just just know because of how I was acting, but most men are not that perceptive. After reading the book "Big White Panties" (funny title, I know, and it's a humerous book) it but gave me great insight to a mans way of thinking.

Sorry you're going through this. I wake up every day now thinking it's going to be a good day, and nothing can set me back. It's amazing what a change of attitude can do for your outlook...but it took me years to get to the point of changing it!

Take it from an girl with experience in this field, life is much easier when you surround yourself with people who support you and "get" you. I had to cut a few ties with high school friends when I moved away. They seemed more than willing to offer criticism for whatever I was doing but getting support or understanding was like pulling teeth. If she's a source of stress for you, do the hard thing and cut her out of your life. You can easily explain that your life is headed in a good direction, and you're sorry she can't be supportive of you but right now, support is all you need from her.

Keep in mind, you're never too busy for a good friend.

At two weeks post-op you really can't eat whatever you want. Your stomach is still healing and putting solid food in it right now....well, I'm about 13 days post-op and the thought of it sends panic through me. This is the "white-knuckle" phase where you have to work through it. Exercise. Read a book. Drink water. Find something to block those thoughts. Most people take multiple fills to feel restriction. At this stage it really is "mind over matter" and you are putting yourself at risk by eating whatever you want.

Sorry I don't have better advice for you Just tell yourself you ARE strong and you CAN do this. Keep your goal in mind....

Okay Kristy, it's mind over matter time. YOU CAN DO THIS! Sometimes drinking water will help me overcome the hunger feeling. Can you go for a jog or get active somehow? That may help take your mind off of it. Think of your goal....and remember that everything you put in your body directly impacts your weight, positive or negative.

If you feel that you have a true food addiction, I highly recommend seeing a psychologist or counselor. It was a pre-op requirement for me, and I ended up seeing a counselor for a few more visits after my initial consult. My overeating was directly related to how I was (or actually, wasn't) dealing with a childhood trauma. I always felt like I had to be busy, so if I wasn't fidgiting with something I was eating. Really, I was just super stressed 24/7 and had to learn how to relax.

Since you still have the band, if you want to lose weight I would start over. See a psychologist, get back in touch with your surgeon and nutritionist, and try again.

Diane, you are amazing. Thank you for the positive note. I was just banded on May 18th and I know I have a long road ahead, but I've fully embraced the accountability and responsibility that goes with the band. You have such a great attitude, and I wish you all the best!

I had my freak-out moment, but it didn't involve food. My insurance denied my surgery the day before it was scheduled to take place, and add in my nerves, I thought for SURE that it wasn't meant to be. The surgeon assured me he would talk to them and get it overturned, which he did right in the nick of time, but I was ready to bail. I thought - I've lost 14 lbs on the liquid diet - I can be successful on my own! But then reality hits and I realized that I wouldn't stick to the diet plan for good because why? I would be HUNGRY. I needed this tool to help control my hunger. I'm three days post op, down over 20 lbs since seeing the surgeon May 7th, and for the first time in YEARS, I felt full yesterday. I'm still on full liquids for two weeks, but about 4 ounces of Greek Yogurt and my body said "enough". I was elated! Just keep your goal in mind. Good luck to you!

Good luck! Sleep well.

My motivation is mixed. Part of me is getting banded to be healthy. My whole family is diabetic with high blood pressure, and coincidentally, obese. I don't want that to be me. But another part of me wants to finally be comfortable in my own skin. To, like smilinginside, be able to walk past a mirror and actually stop and think "I look alright today!" instead of grimicing. I have an amazing, supportive husband who I know loves me no matter what size I am, but I know I can be a better person if I was happier with myself. To achieve that I have to be comfortable with myself. This process so far has proven to me that I can do things I never thought I could, and I'm just starting.

Can I just say THANK YOU for the reality of the post! I'm seeing my surgeon in two days to schedule surgery, and I'm thinking just a day or two off work will do. I wasn't anticipating the possibility of explosive diarrhea...that may put a damper in my work day!

It sounds like today you're doing a little better...compared to the first few days anyways. Have you stepped on the scale yet to see where you're at from pre-op?

Hope things keep going on the up-and-up!

Congratulations all around - on the baby girl, the dedication to the first 6 months of dieting, and the re-dedication to the new 6 months!! I was fortunate to be able to skip the supervised diet, but from what I've heard from everyone it goes by really fast. Keep us posted!

The dietician was actually the one that told me I could have one cup (one measured cup, not coffee cup) of regular coffee a day. For me, that's not going to cut it. I would drink a pot of coffee a day (honestly) so I quit. I do have tea, one cup of earl grey tea in the morning which has no caffiene. I feel SO much better since quitting! I used to drag in the afternoons and feel like I HAVE to have a cup to make it through. Now I don't even crave it.